I will Stand
by kitachu
Summary: Rewrite of an AU story. She holds a secret close to her heart. A secret of pain, a secret of hurt. She cries and can't say why. He knows part of it, but could never guess the rest.
1. Chapter 1

**Alright listen friends. You're going to hate me for this.**

 **I like the idea behind With this Life. I came up with it so of course I like it. However, it wasn't my best writing so I kind of got bored with it. I'm sorry. A lot of people liked it and I know that. So I'm rewriting it here instead of ignoring it and hoping it disappears. So this here is my legitimate writing style and I hope it doesn't fucking SUCK like before. I know it sucked. You know it sucked. It's okay to admit it.**

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She was walking down the hallway when she heard the sound of her best friend's voice. She sighed inwardly and put on a happy face when she turned around to face him. All she wanted to do was get home and get her homework done, but her friends wouldn't let her do that without bugging the hell out of her.

"Sakura," he was huffing when he finally caught up with her and she simply stared at his blond hair, feeling quite disinterested in whatever he had to say. "Sakura," he said again, "You should come with me and Sasuke to a party tonight." Sakura could see the black haired man walking slowly up the hallway, not interested in rushing as quickly as he could, like Naruto had.

"Uh, no." She tilted her head to the side, watching her two friends. Naruto looked quite let down, but Sasuke didn't. He had known what her answer would be and so didn't get his hopes up. For whatever reason, Naruto always did.

"Why not?" he whined, pouting. Sakura wanted to punch him. She hated it when he pouted and he knew it. He still never failed to do it whenever she said no. She sighed.

"Because, Naruto," she sounded tired, "You know my father will never leave my house after I get home today. He never lets me go anywhere and you know it." Sakura thought he should expect this by now, but he never failed to forget every time. He seemed to think her answer would change every time he tried asking her to go out.

"Idiot, you know that she can't go anywhere unless her father investigates it thoroughly," Sasuke said, annoyed. He became annoyed with Naruto faster than Sakura ever did, but it was still a tough tie on the matter.

"Can't you ask your brother to cover for her?" Naruto asked, slightly exasperated.

"I don't like parties anyways," Sakura reminded him. She checked her watch. She really had to get home so she could complete her homework before her father came home. She was held to strict guidelines and if she were to miss even a minute of the schedule, it wouldn't bode well for her. Naruto seemed to give up at that point, looking extremely let down. Sakura didn't care much. She had more harrowing things to worry about other than a distressed Naruto. He'd get over it.

"Wait, Sakura, we'll talk to Itachi and see if he'll come and get you," Naruto said, beginning to walk with her. At this point he knew she wasn't going to stand around any longer and knew he'd have to follow her if he wanted to keep talking to her.

"Don't even," Sakura sighed. "Itachi's always busy with work; he doesn't have time to cover for a teenage girl." Though the words were dejecting, she didn't sound much like it. She was just stating the facts. She didn't want to put Itachi out even though Naruto had no problem doing it. Sasuke finally spoke up after minutes of being quiet.

"Sakura, my mother would love to see you. You don't have to come with us to the party, it's enough to get you away for a little while," he said quietly. Though he wouldn't be happy that she wouldn't be around at the party, they would be a little happier knowing she wasn't being oppressed in that terrible house. They didn't know the extent of what she had to put up with, but they knew, so very well, how very strict her father was and did everything they could to give her a break every now and then. Her father's strictness often made her irritable and more prone to emotional breaks and when they saw it happening, like now, they did everything they could to get her away for a while.

"That's great, Sasuke," she sighed. "Look," she stopped by the door of her car. "If you're really going to go on and on about it, you can go ahead and ask him. Don't even think that I'll go to a party with you. I'm not too into drunk college frat boys trying to hit on you and I know both of you are going to try if you get too drunk. I'll stay with your mother if that's what you want." She wasn't trying to be too much of an asshole. She just had put up with a lot of shit lately and didn't want to deal with more. She knew they wouldn't stop bugging her if she didn't give in and therefore did at one point or another.

"That's great!" Naruto looked very happy. Though she wouldn't be tagging along with them to a party, he didn't really mind. As long as her mood was better in the morning, he'd be more than happy. She needed a little emotional rest.

"Whatever," she finally made it into the seat of her car. She sped out of the parking lot, not even looking behind her. She had to get home. Her house wasn't far from the college, at least, and she got there at record time. She knew she had to be more careful with her time. If she got a traffic ticket, she'd never hear the end of it.

She parked her car carefully and sped up the stoop into the modest two bedroom home she shared with her father. She stopped just inside of the doorway and slipped off her shoes, pulling on her plain brown slippers. She placed her street shoes on the mat, making sure they were perfectly aligned with the edge of the mat. She hung up her coat and made sure nothing was out of place in the downstairs before drifting up the stairs and into her room. She pulled out her laptop and began her homework. Thankfully, today she only had an essay for an English class and finished it rather quickly, sliding her laptop back into her bag.

Before going to the kitchen, she checked her phone. Her father didn't know she had it and she couldn't possibly have it out when he was around. She had a text from Sasuke saying that Itachi had agreed to pick her up and would be there at six, which gave her the perfect amount of time to make dinner and wait for her father to finish. She wasn't allowed to talk to him until he finished his meals. She tucked her phone back into the zippered pocket of her bag after answering Sasuke with a short, simple 'k,' and went downstairs.

She made a simple dinner of baked ziti, knowing it was one of her father's favorites. It would put him into a better mood, though he would know she wanted to ask him permission for something. It didn't matter. If he was in a good mood, the chance to go out somewhere went up by ninety percent. She usually pulled out all the stops when she had to ask for something.

He arrived home just as she was placing their plates on the table, at either end. She had already placed the wrapped silverware and the glasses of water on the table. She had to make sure everything was put perfectly on the placemats and that the water was perfectly half a glass. Though she always took care to make sure it wouldn't ruffle his feathers, she took extra care just to make sure he would be happy with her. The dishes she'd use to make dinner were already washed and put back where they belonged, just as he wanted. She sat quickly and made sure her eyes were on the table when he walked in.

He didn't speak as he walked in and she waited for him to take the first bite before she even picked up her fork. She ate slowly, making sure she finished at the same time he did, just as he wanted. She knew exactly what he wanted and knew he would become irritated if she didn't adhere exactly to what he wanted. She couldn't afford to irritate him tonight and therefore watched herself as much as she possibly could.

"So," he finally said after she had taken their plates and cleaned them. She had sat back down and was staring at the table, waiting for him to speak. She gave no indication of surprise at his sudden speech. "What is it that you want permission for, daughter?" he never called her by name. It was always 'daughter' and nothing else. She didn't know why, but didn't really care.

"Mrs. Uchiha has asked for my presence at her home. She says she has missed my presence and would like to see me," she said softly, just loud enough for him to hear her. He rested his chin on the tips of his fingers and surveyed the quiet girl. He thought for a long while, though she couldn't think what about.

"Alright. I assume Itachi is coming to pick you up?" he assumed it was Itachi. He liked Itachi. She knew he did. Itachi was quiet and stoic and didn't put up with much bullshit. Her father likened them in the same group of people, though he was wrong. Itachi was slightly harsh and cold when you didn't know him, but he was generally nice after a while.

"Yes, father," she affirmed. She wasn't allowed to call him 'dad.' It was either 'father' or 'sir,' though she didn't know why, again. She didn't understand why he wanted everything to be so formal all the damn time. It certainly wore her down after a while.

"Do they expect you to spend the night?" Sakura thought quickly. They usually did.

"Yes, sir," she said, almost immediately. Her voice did not falter in her guesswork. She couldn't allow it to. He would know she didn't know what she was talking about if she paused or if her voice faltered. She didn't want that. She had learned, long ago, how to make it seemed she knew exactly what she was talking about all the time. It usually worked.

"I expect a call from one of the Uchiha's."

"Of course, father," she said softly. He nodded. He pulled himself out of his seat and climbed heavily up the stairs. That was his tired walk, but Sakura couldn't find it within herself to care. She didn't care much for her father that much was true. She checked her watch. She only had ten minutes until Itachi was to arrive and she got up quickly. All she needed was her bag. Mikoto would give her something to wear for bed.

She was waiting at the bottom of the stairs when the doorbell rang. She stood quietly, hands folded and eyes on the floor. She wasn't allowed to answer the door and had to wait for her father to walk heavily down the stairs and slowly open the door to Itachi's unmoving face. He didn't try to look past her father or anything and she didn't look up at him lest her father turn around. She didn't want to get caught and therefore kept her eyes trained on the floor.

"Good evening, Itachi," he greeted the young man warmly. Well, as warmly as her father could. Itachi didn't smile or anything of the like. His black eyes held the older man's and he didn't back down. That was part of the reason her father liked him. He seemed and held himself like a powerful young man and he liked that type of personality.

"Good evening, Mr. Haruno," Itachi always showed him the respect he didn't seem to have for anyone else. Perhaps it was because he was younger than him, but he didn't care. He was just there for Sakura and that was all.

"So why are you picking up Sakura tonight?" Her father was testing him to make sure the stories matched up and he knew it. He had known, after years of picking up Sakura, that he did this every single time and he never faltered in his answer, no matter how very untrue it was.

"My mother has requested her presence at home. She quite misses her and there is a family party tomorrow and would like her help cooking," the young man answered smoothly. The reason his mother wanted her around varied every time Itachi came to get her, but it was usually along the same lines. His mother wanted her around to help her with some kind of 'womanly' duty. It fit her father's sexist expectations and made him happy his daughter was doing work of that sort. It was never true, but that didn't stop him from telling the man what he wanted to hear.

"Very good. I know Sakura is expected to stay the night. I expect a call at some point." Her father was watching him with hard eyes.

"Yes, sir." Itachi knew either he or Sasuke would have to call and pretend to be Fugaku. Honestly, it was usually Itachi who did it. He could impersonate his father perfectly, though Sasuke could do so in a pinch as well. Fugaku would never give into the whims of such an awful man, though he did seem to like having Sakura around. Mikoto liked her so he couldn't say much, but he wasn't about to do things like that. Itachi didn't mind, not really, the phone calls didn't usually last for more than a couple minutes.

"Sakura," her father finally turned to her and held out his hand. She stepped forwards quickly and grasped his hand. It was so cold, like always. He seemed to be a cold man, inside and out. He waited while she switched her shoes and folded her coat over her arm before he presented her hand to Itachi, who took it lightly. When Sakura left the house it was always a dramatic production. Itachi pulled her lightly out the door and her father shut it behind them. They knew he was watching from the window, like he always did, and so Itachi led her by the hand to his car. He opened the door and let her step into the car, only letting go of her hand when she was firmly seated. He shut the door after her before walking to his side.

"So obnoxious," Itachi breathed as he pulled out of the driveway. He looked over at Sakura. She was looking down at her hands, biting her lip.

"I'm sorry. I know it's always a hassle to come and get me and I feel terrible about it," she said softly. She didn't often look at him, didn't often look at anyone as far as he knew. She seemed like a perfectly normal person around her best friends, but around anyone else, even him or his mother, she was a quiet and shy little thing.

"It's quite alright," he said, trying to soften his tone as much as he could. Sakura needed a tone of gentleness and he often adopted one he used with no one else. Though she was quite shy around him, she was closest to him after Naruto and Sasuke. She had told him once, a few years ago; it was because he was always so nice to her, although stoic. Perhaps that was why she was so shy around him. He didn't joke and play around with her like the other two did.

They drove for a good fifteen minutes to the other side of town, the rest of their ride spent in comfortable silence. His family was quite wealthy and had a good amount of land and plenty of privacy at the edge of town. The house was huge. Sakura couldn't count all the bedrooms and bathrooms in the house and those were on the second and third floors. She'd seen the inside of at least three studies and knew there was a library floating around somewhere. The kitchen was huge and could entertain at least two crews of professional cooks and cater at least three hundred people. The lower level also held a parlor, a family room, a living room, and the biggest dining room she'd ever seen, almost like a banquet hall. It was certainly glamorous and she always found herself out of place when she entered it.

Itachi pulled up the long, winding driveway and parked in a garage that held more cars than people that lived in the mansion. Sakura had never had enough care to count them all and didn't decide now to try. Itachi was out of the car first and opened her door, offering his hand to help her out. She waved him off.

"We aren't in the line of vision of my father, there's no need," she huffed, hoisting herself up. Her long skirt got caught in the door, though, and he had to catch her anyways. A glint of amusement shown in his eyes while he watched her untangle her skirt and close the door a little more forcefully than necessary. He wondered why she wore such long skirts, but it was not a new thought. He often wondered why she wore what she did. She also sported long sleeves, no matter the weather. He wondered how she wasn't too hot or too cold depending on the weather.

She followed him up the stairs and he let her into the house first. She took off her shoes and her coat, donning the slippers they'd gotten especially for her. She had certain idiosyncrasies she had from living so long with her father and they couldn't hope to break her of the habits when she stepped foot in the house. They merely went along with it at one point and made her as comfortable as they could.

"Sakura!" Mikoto was in the living room, watching something with a cup of tea in her hands when they walked through. She pulled herself up, setting her tea on a coaster, and hugged the small girl tightly. Sakura was surprised and didn't quite know how to react, but she never did. She didn't receive or give hugs very often, hell she hardly ever initiated any touch, and never hugged back. Mikoto never seemed to mind, though, and she pulled away from her with a warm smile on her face. "Come, sit with me and tell me what's been going on."

Sakura could only nod as she was pulled to the comfortable couch and sat down. "Itachi, dear, would you get her a cup of tea?" Mikoto asked, smiling. Itachi would stick around when Sakura was in the room, though he would pull out work he took home from the office. She didn't really know why he liked to stick around and be in the same room, but she wouldn't try to stop him either. "So, Sakura, what's up?" Mikoto always put her off slightly. She was so open and warm, unlike her own mother that had left long ago. She didn't know how to feel when the older woman did this and found it quite disconcerting.

"Nothing, really," Sakura said softly, looking at the floor. Yet again, she hardly ever looked at whomever she was talking to unless it was Sasuke or Naruto. It was one of those idiosyncrasies she had embedded in her personality from a very young age. "There's just been a lot of school and housework," she elaborated slightly.

"Oh, well, how's school going?" Mikoto never seemed to miss a beat. She could talk about anything and everything and would always find some sort of question to ask. It was an easy conversation when Sakura had to have it and she didn't really mind at all.

"It's easy," Sakura shrugged. She'd always been a very smart girl, had to be. Her father would settle for no less than a hundred percent on anything. She had graduated as valedictorian of her high school class and already had many college credits taken care of. So many, in fact, that she was able to skip two semesters of her major.

"How about boys? Any that you're interested in?" Mikoto asked, waggling her eyebrows. Sakura turned red, almost unable to thank Itachi for the tea he placed in her hands. Instead of answering Mikoto right away, she sipped at her tea and looked anywhere but at the black haired woman. She didn't want to talk about boys, but she knew she had to answer eventually.

"No one's really been standing out," she said finally, after a few long moments. "Anyways, it's not like I could do anything even if I were interested in a boy," she knew she was getting far too personal and part of her was rebelling against that fact, but she owed something to the older woman. "My father will choose my husband eventually, after I finish my schooling. That is how it is in my church," she had resigned herself to this fate long ago and had given up on any longing of finding love. There was no love in her church, just following orders and strictly adhering to her gender role.

"That's horrible!" Mikoto gasped. Sakura had never dropped this before, but she had never really asked before. She had never tried to gossip with the girl and was now feeling terrible that she'd tried now. She felt like she had made the younger woman remember something she was trying hard to forget.

"It doesn't matter," Sakura shrugged. She had bought herself a little time by talking her father into letting her take college classes. She had had to choose a degree in the education field, as the church had a short list of professions women could do. When she was to bear a child, though, her career would become a far off dream, something she'd resigned herself to as well. "Many of my friends have been married, so it's only a matter of time." The silly girls she'd been going to church with and taking Sunday classes with were all married with at least two children by now and they all jovially asked her when she would be wed and would bear children. She'd been doing a good job of deflecting them, but her father wouldn't dodge the pastor forever. Her father was so far up the pastor's ass, she didn't understand why _they_ weren't wed by now.

"My goodness," Mikoto was surprised. Sakura was a little eighteen year old girl, barely an adult and just out of childhood. She couldn't believe that she was already being pressured into marrying and bearing children. "How young were your friends when they were married?" she asked, not really sure she wanted to hear the answer.

"Most of them were sixteen or so," Sakura shrugged. It didn't seem odd to her. Her mother had married at sixteen and had her by seventeen. It was normal in her church. Women were expected to drop out of highschool the moment they turned sixteen and become married, have a child within a year. That's just how it was. Sakura was one of the lucky ones. Because she was so smart, she had been able to talk her father and the pastor out of most things. "A few others were seventeen because they entered school early and were able to graduate before starting a family," she said, trying to make it seem less awful. From the look on Mikoto's face, she hadn't made it so.

"I'm glad you're not married with children," Mikoto said, sighing. "How did you manage that, by the way?" she asked, narrowing her eyes. Sakura shrugged.

"I'm very smart," she said simply. Mikoto couldn't help but laugh. Sakura wasn't inherently funny, but some of the things she said in complete innocence caught others off guard and they couldn't help but to laugh their disconcertedness off. Sakura never really seemed to realize why they were laughing. She was such a naive and innocent girl.

"Well, that's good," she finally said after her laughing fit passed. Sakura just nodded. She yawned into her hand. It was only about seven or so, but she was always tired. She often went to bed late after cleaning the entire house and she woke early so she could make breakfast for herself and her father before leaving for school. "Would you like to go upstairs?" the older woman asked gently, her hand on her knee. Sakura finished her tea before answering.

"Just slightly," she said softly. That was her usual way of saying yes. Though an odd way, it usually got her point across.

"Alright, I'll see you in the morning," Mikoto smiled and looked to Itachi, "Will you show her upstairs, please?" Itachi was her usual guardian in the house, unless Sasuke and Naruto were there to steal her away. They'd gone to a party shortly before Itachi had come back from Sakura's, though, so Itachi had her all to himself.

"Of course." He offered Sakura his hand and pulled her up. Mikoto smiled. Her son was so sweet to the girl and he usually was a cold mask of apathy. It was certainly warming to see him being so sweet. He'd known her for a long while and Mikoto thought he acted in this way because he thought of her as his sister. It warmed her to know Sakura had her family to care for her although her own really didn't. She watched them go up the stairs before turning back to her program.

"Did you want to go to bed?" he asked, stopping outside the guest room they often gave to her. She rarely slept in it, though. She shook her head and nodded down the hallway in an attempt to tell him she'd like to spend a little time with him. Of course, because he knew her so well, he understood it and he made his way down the twisting hallways.

She knew these hallways of course. She knew them well enough to find the rooms she wanted at least. She had become lost once or twice, but someone found her eventually and that was all that mattered. He pulled her into his room and left the door opening, just as she liked. He supposed it was because she had to keep her own door open at home and she felt immensely more comfortable if she was able to do what she did at home.

"Come," he said gently, pulling her to his bed. She sat easily enough, back against the wall, and he joined her shortly after. He grabbed the remote and turned the television on, hoping she'd like what he put on. She didn't say a word on the forensic analysis show he put on, though it was a more informative show than anything else. She liked shows where she could learn something. She leaned into his side and he wrapped an arm around her. This was the way she would act when they were alone and he adored it.

She had confided in him once that she held feelings for him. He thought the same way of her, but both knew it would never come about. She was deeply faithful to her church and she was only buying time until she had to fulfill her duties to that church. He had accepted it, putting his father off on the topic of marriage as well. She pushed herself to buy time so she could be with him as long as possible, but he knew he would have to say goodbye to her at some point. That day was not today, however.

"How are you feeling today?" he asked quietly, not sparing a look at her. She became more shy when she had eyes on her and he didn't want her to crawl back into her shell and hide. He liked it when she was out in the open and it didn't happen often, but judging from her words with his mother, she was feeling that way today.

"I'm tired," she sighed, staring at the bed. She was always tired, he knew. Whenever he managed to see her, she was always yawning and would go to bed early, earlier than anyone else in the house, but she would also sleep much longer. She always had dark, dark bags underneath her eyes and she often rested when visiting with someone.

"Anything else?" he asked. She used him, he admitted it. She would often become frustrated and upset and use him as a surrogate for her father, speaking her feelings and getting out all of the confusing emotions whirling inside her. She used him, but he allowed her to because she needed some kind of output for all the things she felt but could not say. Sakura sighed and he pulled her closer, attempting to offer her comfort for something he knew nothing about.

"It's always been hard, but you know that," she said softly, "Lately, though it's been getting worse. I came home with a ninety-eight on a test instead of a perfect score. I only got one question wrong and he kept me there for forty-five minutes, talking about how I should be grateful that I'm being allowed to continue school and how I shall be married within the next three months if I do that again." He passed his hand over her shoulder, trying to calm her. She held the burden of an entire world on her shoulders and she never breathed a word to anyone save for him.

"Why does he want a perfect score on every test? Surely he doesn't really expect that of you," this was his script. She said this so often, he simply answered immediately the same thing every time. She really didn't care what he said, she knew he was listening. He was always listening and watching, knowing, but wouldn't interject unless it was completely pertinent.

"It's because the pastor is always on him about me I suppose. That's what he says anyways," she said dejectedly, leaning into his body. Her head was planted on his chest now and he didn't mind at all. He brushed his fingers down her neck, soothing her, wondering what he could possibly say to make her feel better.

"You should leave," he said suddenly. Sakura looked at him out of surprise, one of the few times she would look at him. She didn't often look at him for any other reason than surprise or a different strong emotion. She turned red and stared at him for a long while before she could think of something to say.

"I can't. You know I can't," she said softly, finally. He sighed. He knew. This wasn't the first time they'd had this talk. He would tell her that she should just leave and she would come up with a million and one reasons that she couldn't. He didn't understand, but he supposed he never would. She existed on a different plane parallel to his. It existed with only mild differences between the two, but he could never hope to understand. He only hoped to say the right words.

"I know," he finally said, quietly. He felt bad that he'd brought it up again, but felt even worse that he had been shot down again. She didn't seem to realize that she'd said anything wrong, though, and so looked back to the program, intent on leaving this conversation behind. They were quiet for a long while, Sakura not needing to talk and Itachi not knowing what to say. "Do you want to lay down?" he finally asked after a long while.

"Sure," she said softly, looking blearily around her, as if she hadn't quite noticed how late it had gotten. He gestured to the pillows and waited for her to lay down first. She didn't seem to want to sleep yet, but she climbed to the top of the bed and settled comfortably. His bed was soft and there was a seemingly endless supply of blankets. "Wait!" she pushed his shoulder before he could lay down beside her.

"What?" he asked confused. She had never stopped him from laying next to her before and thought he did something wrong. She flushed, realizing she made him second guess his actions.

"You have to call my father, remember?" she asked softly, the flush still evident. Itachi wanted to laugh. Of course it was something trivial like that. He couldn't believe that he had thought he'd done something wrong. He shook his head and pulled away from her. Exchanging no words, he pulled his phone off the desk and left the room to call her father in the hallway.

Sakura watched the door until he came back and she breathed a sigh of relief when she saw he wasn't irritated in the least. Sometimes her father would piss him off and he would have an irritated twitch in his brow. She let him climb in beside her this time and she watched the television, waiting endlessly until he found himself comfortable. It took several minutes until he could lie comfortably and she always got impatient waiting for him.

He finally settled behind her and draped an arm across her waist. She was so tired and her eyes were already closed, her hand resting gently on his. He liked being with her like this. It wasn't often he managed to pull her away from that terrible house, but he felt like he was on top of the world when he managed it. He felt generally warm and his heart felt lightened when he got her into his arms.

"Itachi?" he heard her tiny voice and was instantly awake though he'd just been about to fall into a light doze. He turned her over so he could see her face and brushed his fingers along her cheek. She blushed and closed her eyes, enjoying the gentle affection. "Why does life have to be so hard?" she finally continued. There was a slight pout in her voice, a tone of hopelessness underneath. He hugged her closer, trying to make that feeling go away for her.

"I can't tell you why, Sakura," he said softly. "It's up to you to change it, though." He didn't tell her that it would be tougher than just going along with what her life was like now. He didn't want to tell her that. He knew she could do it, but he had never met anyone with lower self esteem, so he knew it would never happen without his pushing.

"There's nothing to change," she said softly, resting her cheek on his chest and staring at his face. Staring, but not seeing. Her eyes were void, hazy green depths and there was not even a thought passing through them. He didn't like when she had that look in her eyes and she had it often. He saw it almost every time he saw her. It was disheartening and he felt like anything and everything he had tried to make happen flew away like a breath of wind.

"There's everything to change and everything to manage," he said, staring at the feeling. He couldn't bring himself to keep looking in her eyes when she had that look. "It will only change when you decide it's time to," he brushed his long fingers along her neck and she shivered, pressing her body close to his. She was quite ticklish on her neck.

"I don't have such power over my own life." She sounded quite defeated. He didn't know what to say anymore. His words were lost to him and he couldn't think of anything to let her know she did. This always happened. She would wear him down with her sadness and the hopeless words she used until he could no longer think of anything to say to carry on the conversation. He only sighed at the end and pressed a kiss to the top of her head. He had yet to actually kiss her. She had never shown any interest in it and therefore he had not overstepped his boundaries.

"Let's go to sleep," he finally said. "It's late." Sakura could only nod slowly before letting her cheek fall to his chest. She felt his arms tighten around her and press her close, though she knew he was upset with her in some way or another. He was never happy with her by the time they went to sleep. Though her thoughts were harrowing and keeping her up slightly like they always were, she managed to calm her head enough to sleep.

When she woke the next morning, she was still wrapped comfortably in Itachi's arms. She checked her watch and saw it was still early enough that she wouldn't be expected home for hours. Her father didn't wake until noon or so and expected her home before then. It was only nine and she had a couple hours to enjoy time away from that house.

"Good morning," she heard his soft voice. She raised herself slightly, looking down at him for a quick moment. She looked away immediately after, at the world outside his window. The leaves seemed to be falling off the trees quicker than ever and winter was beginning to fall over the town. She didn't like winter. The distaste she held for it was due to the cold penetrating her mood as well as her body. She was never happy when the snow came.

"Good morning," she finally said, still staring out the window. There was a starling on the branch of a tree near his window. She wondered why it hadn't gone south by now. It was surely too cold for it to be around right now. It flew away and she finally allowed herself to fall back onto Itachi's chest. He didn't make a sound as she connected with his chest.

"Did you want to get breakfast?" he asked, trying to sit up. The weight of her body wasn't helping him, but he managed to struggle up. She seemed annoyed by his jostling, but didn't say a word. She seemed thoughtful for a moment.

"Wait, wouldn't your mother have breakfast ready?" they didn't usually skip breakfast with Mikoto and Sakura had heard the woman would become irate when they did. She didn't want to piss Mikoto off in any way, even if she would enjoy a few extra moments alone with Itachi. Itahchi only shrugged and shook his head.

"It seems the two idiots came home late last night completely smashed out of their minds," he said lazily. Sakura giggled softly at his words. It wasn't often he would say words like that and she couldn't help but laugh. He let her have it. "She's currently yelling at them about poor life choices and how they shouldn't have come home drunk like that."

"That's only going to teach them to stay out," Sakura said, pulling herself away from Itachi. She stretched her arms over her head and Itachi missed her warmth immediately. He knew this meant they were going to go and so he pulled himself out of bed as well. He heard her shoulder pop and he looked to her, wondering why that happened. She didn't seem to care, though, so he looked away.

"Perhaps, but I don't believe they'll be going anywhere anytime soon," Itachi sighed while he changed. "Both of them are quite terrified of my mother's wrath and so won't want to try and cross the line again anytime soon." Sakura only nodded. She looked around for her bag, finding it at the foot of the bed, and strung it over her shoulder.

"So where will we be going for breakfast?" she asked as she trailed behind him in the hallway. He shrugged. Hell if he knew. He usually just drove around and stopped at the first diner they came across. Sakura knew that and he wondered why she was asking. He only shrugged the thought off. He reached behind him and she automatically latched onto his hand, gripping tightly. She didn't often hold his hand, but when he reached for her, she caught him.

They bypassed the kitchen by taking the back stairs, though they could still hear Mikoto's raised voice. Sakura couldn't discern separate words, but she knew the older woman was angry, immensely so. She could only imagine that Sasuke and Naruto were sitting at the island in the kitchen, heads in their hands and eyes closed. They definitely weren't enjoying themselves by any means.

Itachi opened the door for her and made sure her long skirt was completely inside the car before closing it. He began driving through town, trying to find a diner that was open for breakfast. Sakura's hand was on his arm and she gestured to the one coming up. They'd been there before and he remembered the food was pretty good for what it was. He nodded and pulled in to the small parking lot. He went to open the door for her, but she was already out, shutting the door. She almost got her skirt caught again, but she managed to pull it away just in time.

"Why do you wear those skirts?" he asked her when they had sat down and were waiting for their food. He had never asked before though he had always wondered. She looked surprised that he asked and looked down at her body.

"Because that's what I'm expected to wear," she said, as though she thought he was dumb. He narrowed his eyes at her in annoyance. She sighed. "I've been wearing skirts and dresses like this for as long as I can remember. I'm not allowed to own shorts or pants and my father had me excused from gym class and the like so I wouldn't wear them," she explained.

"What about the long sleeved shirts, then?" he asked next.

"Why all the interest in my clothing choices?" she asked, guarded. She was always guarded when asked about why she had to do this or that or why she did things others didn't. She replied defensively and wouldn't often talk a long while after. Itachi knew he treaded a dangerous path, but he really did want to know. He had never seen her in anything short sleeved and almost everything was covered by clothing.

"I never asked before," he answered simply. "I just want to know." Sakura seemed to calm minimally, but she didn't answer for a long moment.

"I come from a conservative background, Itachi, you know that. There are things I'm not allowed to do and things I cannot wear. My life is watched by everyone in it and I am scheduled and regulated every moment of the day. That is why I wear the things I do, because if I do not adhere to the strict guidelines given to me," she paused, thinking she didn't want to get so personal that she put him off forever, "You don't want to know what will happen and I don't want to remember," she finished strongly. She wouldn't tell him. She didn't want to. There would be a difference in the affectionate looks he gave her and he would no longer wish to hold her on the nights he could or reach for her hand when they were alone. It wasn't something she wished to happen.

Itachi thought it better to not try and wheedle her more and so swallowed what he was going to say. He reached across the table and offered her his hand. She smiled faintly and gently laid her hand in his. It was their usual signal that she was still okay to talk and wasn't too angry with him. If she returned his touch, she was still okay.

"Am I to take you home after breakfast?" he asked, watching her face for any little change in emotion. She only shrugged.

"That would be best. It is poker night for my father and there is no way he'll miss my presence," she sighed heavily. "I have to clean the house from top to bottom and make dinner before they show up." She wasn't looking forward to it, he knew. She never did. She hated when her father's friends came by, but she wouldn't tell him why. He simply accepted it and didn't like dropping her off at home when the time came.

Their food came and for that Sakura was glad. She couldn't think of any more words to say to him and it was a welcome relief. He observed her relief, of course, but said nothing about it. She slowly slid her hand from his to pick up her fork and start on the eggs and toast she'd gotten. He started when she did. They didn't talk while they ate. She had explained to him that, at the table, there was nothing to be said until the dishes were cleaned and put away. It was just another of her idiosyncrasies. He hated that these things had been drilled into her since early childhood.

The waitress took their plates and left the bill, but they stuck around for a little while longer. Itachi knew she had to be home by noon, as always, and didn't like taking her home a moment sooner. He enjoyed her company though they didn't have much to talk about sometimes. It was as though the sun shone on him when she was in his presence. They talked about trivial things this time, though Sakura was still having trouble coming up with things to say.

"Will you be coming to the Thanksgiving party this year?" he asked, right before it was time to go. The question caught her off guard and she stared at the empty place in front of her for a long moment before she could come up with the words to answer.

"I'm going to try, but you never know what's going to happen with my father around," she said slowly, softly. Her father didn't celebrate holidays, not since her mother left, but that didn't mean he would allow his daughter to enjoy them. He had let her attend last year, though that was the first year she'd been allowed to go.

"Well, I'll ask him," Itachi said, beginning to pull himself up. Sakura followed suit, latching onto his hand as they left the diner. She wouldn't be able to touch him for a while and the knowledge of that weighed heavily on her mind. She closed her eyes when she was seated in the car, trying to block the ride home out of her mind.

All too soon, he was parking in the driveway and opening the door. She allowed herself to look up at his face for a quick moment before she got out of the car. What he saw in her eyes made him want to shrug her hand off his arm, get back in the car, and drive far, far away. She looked about to cry. She looked like she didn't want to go and as though she would never see him again. Within the next moment, she was out of the car, her eyes on the ground, and the perfect daughter façade back on her face. A feeling Itachi couldn't quite comprehend filled him and he slowly led her up the steps, knocking at the door.

"Good morning, Itachi," her father said when he opened the door. There was a smile on his stern face and Itachi wondered what that could possibly mean.

"Good morning, Mr. Haruno," Itachi said smoothly. "I have brought Sakura back to you, safe and sound," the words he usually used when bringing Sakura back sprang from his lips. The older man nodded and Itachi had to offer Sakura's hand to him. She had to hold back a wince when his cold, rough hand touched hers, so different from Itachi's. Her heart was hollow as she stepped into the house and she felt as though she was in a dream as she thanked Itachi and her father shut the door. He dropped her hand as though burned the second they were alone and he walked quickly away from her, up the stairs. She switched her shoes and hung up her coat, putting her bag into her room before going to the kitchen to make her father lunch. Though she wasn't hungry, she knew she was going to have to eat.

She made a light lunch of avocado and tomato sandwiches. She set it on the table with the customary half glass of water and sat down, waiting for him to come down. They ate in silence as they usually did and she sat back down after the dishes were cleaned.

"Did Mikoto enjoy your company?" he asked when he was ready. Sakura didn't look at him. She didn't tighten her hands in her lap, though she wanted to. She didn't wince at his voice, though she wanted to. It was easy to lie when he didn't allow her eyes to catch his.

"Yes, very much," she said softly. "She complemented my cooking and understood I had to leave so I could not stay and help her clean up after the party." It was a lie she had told a million times a million different ways. The words came easy to her and she knew Mikoto would back her up on anything and everything she said.

"Splendid." He stood. "I expect your duties to be accomplished today," he said before leaving the table. Sakura only nodded slowly, even though she knew he could not see her. She waited until his door was slammed shut and then she was up, in the kitchen. She had to get to work now, or else she would never have everything done. She had to start with the kitchen so she could leave a stew on the stove afterwards.

She worked mindlessly, making her way through the house. She knew the house was already spotless, but went through everything anyways. Woe be to her if her father came down and thought she hadn't done anything. He would find an imaginary speck of dust and would berate her about it for hours and hours. He would force her to stand in front of his friends and tell them how much of a useless girl she is. She had had that humiliation enough times to know she never wanted it again.

The stew was just finishing just as she completed vacuuming the rooms. She still had to dust the furniture and pull the laundry out of the dryer, and then she was done. She put those on hold to get the stew off the heat and pour it into a nice serving bowl her father insisted she use for things such as these. It would stay warm long enough for them to eat it. She did the last two things quickly before returning to the kitchen.

She prepared a simple salad and washed the stew pot, then pulled out a smaller pot and set it to boil, pulling the things she would need out. Her father required that she serve a main dish and at least two side dishes at each of these gatherings and she would pick easy dishes that seemed rather difficult to make. She had had years of thinking to know how to fool him into thinking she'd spent a lot of time and effort on things such as these.

A short while later, she had made pasta salad and everything was set out on the table. She set the entire six places at the table and put a half glass of water and silverware folded into napkins at each. She padded up the stairs and had her door closed just as the doorbell rang, just in the nick of time. She sat at her desk, breathing deeply and staring at the wall. She heard her father walk down the stairs and heard the loud voices of her friends.

She stayed in her room and finally allowed herself to cry, like she always did when her time with Itachi ended. Remembering how his warmth felt next to her and the way he reached for her when he wanted to know she was there hurt her chest and she hated herself a little for it. She had resigned herself to a life with a loveless marriage, in a church that she hated with every ounce of her being, but she wouldn't leave, she never could.

Her mother had left and she couldn't do the same to her father. The church had already shamed him once and without her, he had nothing. He had nothing to be proud of and nothing to marry off to a prominent member. He had nothing to show off to his friends and nothing to really fight for, as she knew it took quite a bit to sway the pastor in allowing her to go to college. Her father had raised her and gave her everything she needed. She couldn't betray him like that.

She knew that she held feelings for Itachi and she never wanted it to end even though she cried every time she had to leave him. She knew it would hurt like nothing else when she had to say goodbye for the last time with the knowledge she would never feel the warmth and safety of his arms again or the small things he did to show he held great favor for her. She knew she was setting herself up for the worst pain in her life, but she couldn't make herself stop.

She heard her father call her from downstairs and she wiped her eyes, pulling herself away from the desk. She didn't have it inside of her to lie to everyone downstairs about why she'd been crying or why she didn't look the best. She didn't have any more lies in her today. She pushed her remorse and despairs down deep inside her body and opened her door.

 _May my hell begin now,_ She thought at the top of the stairs.


	2. Chapter 2

**So I got a splendid review that definitely made me giggle about how I should kill myself. Well, Guest, I tried that years ago and it didn't work so I guess you're stuck with me. Sorry?**

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She woke feeling more tired than when she went to sleep. She stared listlessly at the ceiling, unable to make her body move. She was so tired and her body felt like lead. It didn't want to listen to her and she just wanted to close her eyes and go back to sleep. She always just wanted to sleep. Sighing and pulling herself up, she had lain in bed for an additional fifteen minutes and she had things she had to do before she could leave. She stretched her arms above her head and popped her shoulder back into place. Her shoulder always seemed to be mildly dislocated after sleeping.

She changed. She didn't have time to take a shower after lying in bed for so long. She left her room and went to the kitchen, making the usual eggs and toast for breakfast that she always did. She left her father's plate on the table and ate her own quickly. He was never up with her and she had told him he would make her late for school and so this was the only meal they didn't eat together. She ran back upstairs and grabbed her bag, heading out the door as quick as she could.

Sasuke and Naruto weren't around this early in the morning. She had about seven college courses she took only this semester. She was being pushed to finish this as quickly as possible and so took on much more than anyone else. She sighed as she got out of her car and shouldered her heavy bag. She walked slowly to her first class. It was a wonder how she even managed to find classes that took place at seven in the morning, but she managed it and was regretting having to get up so early every day.

She made it through her first couple of classes, boring as always, until she was bombarded with Sasuke and Naruto again. They always seem to have a sixth sense pertaining to her relative location to where they were. She waited patiently for them, Naruto running down the hallway and all but mowing people down and Sasuke following slowly behind, looking vaguely annoyed. Sasuke always looked vaguely annoyed.

"What's up, Sakura?" Naruto smiled, leaning against a wall. Sakura waited until Sasuke caught up and was standing in front of her, waiting for her answer. Naruto was a loud piece of shit and he had heard what he'd said. He wanted to know how she was doing as well, but he knew she wouldn't answer truthfully. She rarely ever did.

"Nothing really, just waiting to go home," she answered loftily. Sasuke thought she looked tired, more so than usual that is. She always looked tired. She was moving slowly and he knew her mind would never be as slow as her movement, but her words were lagging as well. It was a common sign that she was getting worn down at home.

"How long has it been since you last came over?" Sasuke asked, beginning to walk with her to her next class. She only had two more today and then she could go home. She couldn't wait to go home even though she knew she wouldn't get any more sleep than last night. She hardly ever did.

"I don't know, three weeks?" she didn't sound confident. She knew the Uchiha's Thanksgiving party was coming up very soon, that was for sure, but she didn't even want to try and talk her father into letting her attend. She was too tired for it and wasn't too sure she had in her to lie and finagle her way around her father.

"That's not good," Naruto looked worried as well. He had finally noticed she wasn't feeling herself when Sasuke had said something. Naruto wasn't known for his powers of observation and therefore missed a lot of things before Sasuke would point it out. It was a good thing his best friend saw and thought of everything.

"Shit happens," she deadpanned. She didn't really know what else to say. Would she like time away from her father? Yes. Did she have it in her to talk him into letting her stay away for a night? Nope. She just wanted to sleep for an eternity, but that was never happening. That's all she wanted lately, even before she had finally managed to get out that night.

"Are you going to the thanksgiving party?" Naruto asked loudly as they stood outside her classroom, waiting for it to start. She shrugged.

"Probably not, Naruto. Why would I even want to go anyways? There are way too many people I don't know and I can't tell any of them apart. Your entire family looks the same, Sasuke," she shrugged. Naruto laughed and Sasuke cracked a smile. They knew what she meant. Sasuke's entire family had black eyes and black hair and if you didn't know them, they all looked the same. Hell, Sasuke would get a couple of them confused every now and then.

"You should come," Sasuke said quietly. Sakura shrugged. She just didn't have it in her. Sasuke narrowed his eyes. Was she becoming depressed? She would usually get a little despondent when the colder seasons came along, but nothing like this. She certainly seemed a little hopeless and he couldn't help but feel that she didn't want them to try and do anything about it.

"I'll talk to you after class," she said, pulling herself into the classroom. Naruto looked at his phone.

"Shit!" he began running in the other direction. Sasuke watched him go, knowing he was about to be late for his own class. Naruto was terrible when it came to time management. Sasuke walked down the hallway slowly; his class didn't start for another hour or so. He decided it would be nice to sit outside for a while. It wasn't too cold today and he hadn't just chilled outside for a while. He sat at a picnic table just outside the doors and leaned his head into his hands, thinking.

He didn't want to just leave Sakura alone, not when she was acting like this. It was a recipe for disaster and he wasn't about to let that disaster happen. He had known her far too long and had become far too invested in her as a friend. He wasn't even as close to Naruto as he was to her and it all revolved around the fact she understood his dark feelings when they came about. She validated them and made him feel less insane and he did it for her, too. It was a friendship built on mutual understanding and comfort on the matter.

"Hey." He was shoved from his thoughts at the sound of the female's voice. He glared up at the blonde he didn't quite know the name of, telling her that her presence was not welcome. She didn't seem to notice, or maybe she didn't even care, because she sat next to him and smiled at him with the force of the sun. His glare dropped, but the perpetual glower he wore around others did not. She, yet again, didn't seem to notice or care.

"What do you want?" he finally asked barely restrained annoyance in his voice.

"You're Sasuke Uchiha, right? I'm Ino. You're friends with the loud blonde guy with the whisker marks on his cheeks and the girl with pink hair?" she looked at him, expecting an answer and he sighed, nodding. What did she want with him? Did she just want to know something about his two friends? He wasn't in the mood to talk about himself or his friends.

"What of it?" he asked finally.

"Are they dating?" she didn't stop to think about her words. She was a lot like Naruto, huh? She just came right out with it and didn't beat around the bush. Certainly off putting, but he was more than used to it. He sighed and shook his head. "How do you know?" she narrowed his eyes at him. Sasuke rolled his own eyes.

"Sakura doesn't date people," he answered flatly. "That's just not how she is. Wouldn't you think I would have noticed if my friends had romantic feelings to each other?" he really just wanted her to go away. He didn't understand why she was asking these things. Did she like Naruto? If so he would have to find some way to murder her before she got to him. He would definitely murder her if she began dating him.

"Don't worry," she answered his glower, "My friend, Hinata, likes him. You know Hinata, don't you? She's also from one of the prominent families here." Sasuke vaguely conjured up an image of a dark haired pale eyed young woman. He had met her at one of his mother's various parties, he knew that much, but he didn't try to talk to her or get to know her. He had stood against a wall with one of her family members for a long while. He thought his name was Neji.

"Why doesn't she just talk to him and ask?" Sasuke asked, tone still flat. "We are far from middle school at this point." He didn't think he had needed to point it out, but obviously some people were stuck in a time that had long since passed.

"She's really shy," Ino shrugged. "Anyways, I told her I would ask for her, but I can't seem to find the kid anywhere." She certainly seemed annoyed with that fact, but he couldn't bring himself to care.

"It's a school, where do you think he is?" Sasuke could not get over the idiocy of this woman. Surely, since they were in a school and she couldn't find the kid, he'd be in class, right? Ino scoffed.

"I meant I couldn't find him anywhere the past couple of days. I've been looking between classes and shit, dumbass." Sasuke narrowed his eyes at her words. He didn't like being called that when, clearly, he wasn't the one being a dumbass in this situation. Before he could find himself more irritated, he pulled himself up. "Hey, where are you going?" she called at his retreating back.

"To class, where else would I go?" he shot back at her. He would be at least ten minutes early, but he couldn't care less. As long as he was away from the blonde, he couldn't care less. She was a hundred times more annoying than Naruto could ever be and he simply didn't have the patience within him to deal with her.

He found Sakura waiting outside the door to his classroom and he raised a brow in question. She only held up a slip of paper in response. He wordlessly took it from her, scanning it before handing it back to her. It was a message from her father. She wasn't allowed to have a cell phone; he didn't know about the one she kept secretly, and would instead call the administration building and they'd send her a note.

"So you're not allowed home until seven tonight?" he asked. She rolled her eyes at him and nodded.

"You know what that means," she said tonelessly. Indeed, he did. It meant her father was having company of the paid entertainment type during the afternoon and she wasn't allowed to be around for it. Not that she wanted to be, anyways, but it was a welcome reprieve from having to do her usual afternoon routine. "Oh well, it means I can go out with you and Naruto instead of having to go home," she shrugged. Both he and Naruto had a couple more classes after this and she didn't. She would just go to the library and complete her homework.

"You should tell Itachi, too," he said, knowing his brother would want to spend a little time with her. Sakura nodded.

"I'll ask if he wants to get dinner with me," she said simply. She wasn't about to try and invite him out with her and the other two. It would only put a damper on their conversation and the shenanigans they managed to get themselves into. It was easier and more enjoyable to spend time with him alone.

"Alright," Sasuke nodded. "I'll see you later," his class was about to start. She raised her hand in farewell and broke into a jog to get to her last class on time. She was excited, that was for sure. She still felt extremely tired and just a little hopeless, but with the free time she was allowed today, her mood was lightened considerably. She was smiling for the first time that day and didn't mind the boring math class she had to sit through.

Sasuke and Naruto found her in the library after their last class let out at noon. She nodded in response to their quiet hellos and finished the last few words on her English essay. She closed her computer and tucked it into her bag. She stood and strung it over her shoulder, following them out the door. The librarians were very aggressive about the silence here and would yell at them, mostly because of Naruto. He didn't really have an 'inside' voice and his whisper was just a toned down version of yelling.

"So, Sasuke tells me that you don't have to go home until late today," Naruto started the second they were out the door. Sakura only nodded in response. "So, what were you thinking of doing with us?" he asked, a huge smile on his face. He was excited he got to spend some time with Sakura, but was much more enthusiastic about it compared to Sasuke. That was usual, though. Sasuke wasn't much to show emotion.

"I don't know," she shrugged. She really didn't. She didn't know of anywhere to go or what to do in town. She wasn't allowed out of the house much and when she was it was usually under the guise of helping Mikoto. The Uchiha house was basically the only place she _would_ go. It wouldn't get them anywhere asking her what she wanted to do.

"Let's go to the park and walk around the trails!" Naruto was yelling. Sakura wanted to hit him over the head, but stopped herself. It was quite cold out today and she didn't have the clothes to walk around in the woods. She was wearing her usual long skirt and small heels. She didn't even have a thick enough coat to stay outside for more than ten minutes or so. It was a little chilly today, so she didn't like the idea of staying out for hours.

"I don't have a warm coat, dumbass. How do you expect me to walk in mud and shit with this on?" she gestured to her skirt. Naruto looked sheepish and he scratched the back of his head, smiling stupidly. He had forgotten about her clothing choices and didn't think it would hinder her from doing whatever he and Sasuke decided on doing.

"Why don't we just go to the mall?" Sasuke asked, shrugging. He knew Sakura didn't have money for anything, but that wouldn't stop her from enjoying herself with them. He would probably get her a smoothie or something from the food court. He always tried to get her something that she liked on the odd day she actually got time to hang out.

"That's such a good idea!" Naruto was saying while they were walking to Sasuke's car. Naruto had totaled his car a couple weeks prior, even though it wasn't really his fault. "I need to get new shoes and I have to get a present for—" he stopped, flushing. "For someone I like," he finished lamely. He didn't want to let them know he was interested in a girl and wanted to flatter her with something. Even in Naruto's tiny brain, he knew he would never hear the end of it from his friends.

Sakura took the passenger's seat, mostly at Naruto's insistence. Sasuke drove a little more carefully than either of them and she and Naruto would often tease him about it, but he didn't care much about it. He drove the way he wanted to and that was the end of it. Before long, they were pulling into the parking lot of the small mall in town and Naruto was out of the car almost before it stopped moving, but he didn't seem to care much. He was far too excited. Sasuke and Sakura walked slowly behind him, laughing to themselves. Naruto was always so excited for anything and everything.

They let him pull them across the mall in search for shoes and he finally decided on a pair after six different stores and an hour of looking for something he liked and wanted. Sasuke, at this point, was getting tired and annoyed with him and so went in search of something to drink with the promise of coming back. Sakura only smiled at him and nodded, intent on staying with Naruto. If one of them didn't, he'd become lost for the next three hours.

She was trailing behind him in a little store that didn't seem like anything he would ever use. It was full of things that more pertained to girls and was definitely not something he would buy for himself. She stopped him, a curious look in her eyes. "What are you here for?" she asked and he instantly became nervous, laughing and scratching the back of his head, a common sign that he didn't really want to tell her. "No lies, Naruto," she sighed. "I can help you if you're telling me what you're looking for exactly."

"Oh," he laughed nervously again. "Well…there's this girl," was all he could get out before flushing. "I can't think of anything to get her to make her think I like her though," he finished. He knew the entire thing was stupid and that's why he didn't want to tell his friends, but Sakura was far more understanding than Sasuke ever was. He would have made fun of him for a couple hours before bunkering down and helping him. Sakura would think of teasing him, but never would. She would just help him and never say anything else about the matter.

"Here," Sakura picked up a small statue of a mermaid. It was certainly sparkly and looked pretty. "Don't get her any jewelry, that'll just throw her off. If she likes knick knacks like this, you can tell her that you saw it and thought of her." Naruto broke out in a huge smile and couldn't help but to hug Sakura excitedly, lifting her up for a second. She laughed and let him have the moment. She wouldn't allow his hugs on a regular day, but sometimes he just got way too excited.

"Thanks, Sakura," he was grinning at her and looked so happy she'd helped him. She didn't quite understand why. It was a simple thing; really, it wasn't like she was giving him words to ask her out or anything. It was a welcome thing to be appreciated, though, so she just smiled back at him and put the little statue in his hands. He went to go pay for it while she looked at the other things around the store. It was just full of knick knacks, really, and she could see why Naruto had chosen this store to walk into.

"You just have to tell me how it went," she said while they walked out of the store. Sasuke was waiting at a bench on the lower level of the mall and so she began leading the blond in that general direction. Naruto didn't seem to notice, he was just so happy and excited about the gift he managed to get for the unknown girl.

"Of course I'm going to tell you, Sakura!" he laughed. "I probably wouldn't be able to keep my mouth shut even if you didn't tell me!" It was true, at least. Naruto had an issue keeping his mouth shut about anything good that befell him, like a girl enjoying his present or saying yes to a date. She and Sasuke were privy to a lot of things in his life only because he couldn't resist telling them about anything and everything.

Sakura only shook her head and spotted Sasuke across the room. She began walking faster; leading Naruto and they were standing in front of the black haired boy sooner rather than later. He handed her a smoothie, a bottled soda in his own. Her eyes lit up at the drink and immediately began drinking it.

"Have you texted Itachi?" he asked while they walked around. There wasn't anything they really needed to do anymore; they were just enjoying themselves at this point. Sakura nodded, pulling out her phone to see if he answered. Because she had to keep it hidden a lot, she frequently forgot about it. She remembered it eventually and answered her friends, even if it was a couple hours late.

"He says he'll come get me from the school at four thirty," she said, sending him a simple 'k' in response. Sasuke nodded and checked his own phone for the time. They had about another hour together before Itachi came to steal her away. There wasn't really much to do, though, other than homework, and Sakura had already completed hers. They just walked around the mall for the last hour, trading small talk back and forth. Sakura was quite surprised Naruto managed to keep his mouth shut about the girl he liked. He was really trying to keep this secret, huh?

The time seemed to go by in the blink of an eye and she was standing with Itachi beside his car before she knew it, saying goodbye to her best friends. Itachi's hand was on the small of her back, wanting to touch her in some way after being away for so long. She liked that he wanted to touch her. His touch made her feel warm on the inside even though it was cold as all hell on the outside.

"I'll see you guys tomorrow," she smiled at them. Naruto gathered her up into another hug which she allowed. He was still just happy that she'd helped him and she put up with his affection. Sometimes, she just had to swallow her pride and allow it. Sasuke just nodded at her before climbing back into his car. Naruto stayed for a few moments longer.

"Remember to call us if you need us," he smiled at her before resting his hand on the top of her head briefly. She smiled under the usual goodbye he gave her. "I'll see you tomorrow, Sakura," he grinned and went to sit in the car. Sasuke sped out of the parking lot, already in a bickering battle with the blond. Sakura knew they never stopped bickering when she wasn't around to mediate the conversation. She looked up at Itachi.

"So, where are we going for dinner?" she asked, resting her cheek on his shoulder for a brief second, his arms around her in that moment as well. Itachi was really the only one she would touch and didn't have a problem when he initiated it, either. It was a nice feeling having someone around that she didn't mind showing the smallest amount of affection to.

"There's a restaurant near here that has pretty good food," he said, opening the door for her. She had gotten annoyed with him once upon a time when he wouldn't stop doing this, but she had realized that he did this because he was a gentleman and had been taught to, not because of her father. She just grit her teeth and bore it at this point, knowing he wouldn't change even though she didn't like being reminded of her father's strictness when she was out of the house.

She didn't say a word while he drove, but she wasn't expected to and was quite happy about it. He reached silently for her hand she caught it, squeezing tightly. His brother had clued him in to how she was feeling today and it worried him slightly. He knew she always battled with depression, much like his brother did, but she wouldn't admit when she was feeling bad and wouldn't ask for help when everyone, including herself, knew it. He could only offer her his hand in place of the words he didn't have.

"Here," he pulled into a small parking lot of a neat little restaurant that was shoved between a gas station and an inn that had seen better days. She pulled herself out of her seat and was halfway out of the car by the time he was grabbing her hand and helping her steady herself. He led her inside and the hostess seated them with little wait. She didn't say much until the order was placed and then he decided to ask.

"How are you feeling?" this was the question she hated from him the most and he knew it, but he wouldn't stop asking. He needed to know. He wanted to make sure she was doing okay because he had an inherent need to make her feel better. It was a feeling he knew often because he often felt the same way around Sasuke when he was plagued by dark thoughts too. Though Itachi rarely showed much emotion, he still cared and wanted those closest to him to know that in so many words.

"Tired," she answered, staring at the table. "So tired. I couldn't get out of bed for a few minutes this morning." This is what he was worried about. When Sakura was feeling bad, she would have a lot of trouble getting out of bed in the morning and the exhaustion showed plainly on her face. She was always tired, but the word brought on a new meaning when she couldn't get out of bed.

"Can I do anything?" he asked, only slightly hopeful. She rarely asked for help and would hardly ever take it even when it was offered to her. She only shook her head and he narrowed his eyes. There must be something he can do. "Have you spoken to your father about the thanksgiving party?" She became very still, staring at the table. He knew he said something wrong.

"I don't have the energy to lie to him about it this time," she said softly, voice tiny. She simply didn't and she couldn't find the motivation within herself to do it. She really couldn't. He caught her with a deep stare.

"You don't have to," he said quietly, reaching across the table for her hand. She allowed him to grab her own and he squeezed, rubbing his thumb along the back of her hand. "You know I'll talk to him if you need it." Sakura hid her face from him. She didn't want to ask him to. He already did a lot for her and she hated when she felt like she was putting him out.

"I don't want to ask that of you," she said quietly. He shook his head and squeezed her hand again, waiting until her eyes lifted to his face. She looked tired. She looked worried about a lot of things and there was not even a spark of life in her dull eyes. She was feeling worse than she let on and he would have never known if he hadn't gotten her to look at him.

"It isn't much to ask," he said softly. It really wasn't. Giving her a break and a chance to strengthen her mental walls to weather through her life wasn't much to ask for. He knew from watching Sasuke from a young age that it was important to give that person a break from what causes those feelings. For Sasuke, he needed things to do and be stimulated so he didn't feel like he was doing nothing with his life. It wasn't good for him to spend more than a couple days doing nothing. For Sakura, it was taking her away from her father. He caused her dark feelings, it wasn't exactly hidden. She wouldn't leave him forever, they had all tried it at one point or another, but they did manage to get her away for a few days at a time.

"Fine. If you want to talk to him yourself, far be it from me to stop you," she gave in. He knew she did when wheedled enough. His brother and Naruto were much better at making her give up quite quickly, but he didn't have as much practice as they did. She would give into him eventually though, which was pleasant. He would have to call her father and ask to come over to talk to him about it, which was a lot of work honestly. If he wanted Sakura to go anywhere without her asking permission first, he had to get a written statement from his mother, stating what she needed Sakura's help for. Then, he would have to call her father and set up an appointment to talk to him about the matter, usually the night he would be taking her away for a little while. It wasn't usually hard to get her father's permission, at least for him. He was all smooth words and polite tone to the man, so he never had any problems.

"You could never stop me," he finally said after all those thoughts were chased out of his head. He caught the smallest smile just as it left her face and he sported a small one as well. She would smile around him every now and then, but not as much as he would like. The food finally came and she was glad. She wouldn't need to talk for a while and it was a welcome relief from the opinionated man.

Yet again, she didn't talk until they were finished eating and the plates were taken away. Itachi watched her for a long moment, wondering what he should say now. Her hand was in his again and she was looking at them. He couldn't begin to guess what she was thinking and he wished she spoke her mind more so he wasn't always guessing.

"Would you like to go back now?" he asked. She still had a little while, about an hour or so, but he didn't know what to do with her right now. He often came across this problem. Sakura shook her head vehemently. If she went back now, it would just make her mood worse. She would miss him more if he left early rather than leaving when she did. He didn't know what to say.

"Naruto has some girl that she likes," she finally said. He was glad she thought the mood awkward enough to warrant some kind of small talk. He was surprised though. He had heard nothing of Naruto being interested in a girl so he was slightly off put by her sudden words.

"That's interesting. Do you know who it is?" he finally asked after the surprise passed. He thought it was good Naruto was interested in a girl; it would keep him away from the house for a little while. He was a loud person and Itachi often sported a headache from him. Even though the house was huge, you could still catch bits of Naruto's voice at pretty much any hour of the day.

"No clue," she laughed at the blank expression on his face. Though she was laughing at him, he was still glad to hear it from her. "He wanted to get a present for her, though. I guess he wanted to let her know he liked her without having to say it or something," she shrugged. "I helped him pick something out because I didn't feel like following him to a dozen stores trying to make his bizarre brain happy." She didn't really understand the reasoning behind his wanting to give a girl a present when she wasn't even dating him yet, but she just accepted his way of thinking.

"Interesting," was all Itachi could say. He checked his phone. He didn't like that there was only forty-five minutes left of his time with her, but he accepted it. Time seemed to fly by when he was able to be around her.

"Sasuke seems worried about something," Sakura said quietly. She never knew why Sasuke was worried, but Itachi knew a lot more about his brother. He was worried about her. He could see the warning signs and knew when to be worried when the rest of them didn't.

"I wouldn't worry about it," was all he said. "Sasuke'll be fine when this semester's over. He's been working himself hard to get his grades up." Sasuke had never been the best at school and Sakura was very aware of that fact. She took his explanation wholeheartedly because of that fact, thinking that nothing was really off.

"Do you want to go for a little walk?" she asked, bored. They were never great conversationalists that much was true, and she would rather be walking in the chilly weather outside than try and find more stuff to talk about.

"Sure," he said, pulling himself up. He grabbed the check and went to the hostess to pay, Sakura waiting behind him. They left and he pulled her hand close to his side. He didn't want to stop touching her and she need to understand that and accept it every time she saw him. She held his hand tightly and huffed in the cold air.

"Are you cold?" he asked, looking down at her. She only wore a thin coat and he had caught the shiver that had started from her chest and made its way down her arm. She shook her head, not wanting to go back inside and struggle through a conversation with him again. She felt a heavy sweatshirt fall over her shoulders and she looked up at him, surprised.

"Won't you be cold?" she asked while she pushed her arms into the sweatshirt. It was warm from his body and she enjoyed it, holding it closed while she returned her hand to his. He only shook his head.

"It's more important that you're warm," was all he said. It caught her by surprise, like it always did, that he was really just a gentleman. He let her hand go and wrapped his arm around her waist instead, pulling her to his side. It wasn't often he would do this, but he did it under the pretense that she was cold. "Are you warming up bit?" he asked, hoping she was.

"Of course I am," there was a trace amount of amusement in her voice, "I'm wearing your sweatshirt and you have your arm around me. How could I be cold?" It was one of those very rare moments that would come out every now and again. He couldn't help the smile on his face. They had walked for about fifteen minutes, so he turned them back around, in the direction of her car. It was a short five minute ride back to the school and her car, but he knew she would want a few extra minutes to say goodbye to him there.

Sakura didn't feel so cold on the way back, but she still held her hands gratefully to the heater when they were back in the car. He noticed, but didn't say a word, and merely turned back to the college. She watched the scenery pass, his hand finding hers yet again, but that didn't help the hollow feeling that was growing slowly in her chest. She was going to cry again when she got herself alone, she knew it. She loved seeing him but hated when the time for goodbye came. She was always so silent.

He parked and they were standing next to the driver's side door of her car. He leaned against her car and she just stood there, staring blankly at the ground. She couldn't make the words come out of her mouth. She didn't want to goodbye and so those words wouldn't form on her tongue, she couldn't make the sound come out of her throat. Itachi seemed to know this and he only pulled her in for a hug. She planted her face firmly in his chest and stared at it. She didn't want to look at his face, she would only cry.

"Sakura," he said softly. It was almost time to go. He waited as she slowly lifted her head to look him in the eyes. "I'll see you soon," he promised, tightening his arms around her. Without warning, tears began falling rampantly down her face. Worry exploded inside of him, but he didn't know what to do. He wasn't usually faced with crying woman. "What's wrong?" he asked quietly, hoping she'd answer.

"I don't want to go home," she muttered, pressing her face into his chest. He wrapped his arms tightly around her and held her close, trying to offer her comfort to stop her tears. "It isn't a place I want to be right now and I don't want to go!" she couldn't think of any other words to say other than she didn't want to go. She knew Itachi was holding her close, but it offered her little comfort knowing she would have to leave him in a couple minutes.

"Why not?" he finally asked. He didn't know why she didn't want to go home when half the time that's all she would talk about. She wouldn't answer for a long moment, her hiccups and sobs stopping her from being able to form words.

"It's a terrible place and it never felt like home," she answered honestly and the honesty was what pierced his heart. He didn't know what to do, though. Sasuke was much better dealing with these situations because he'd been there and would be infinitely more in the future. He didn't have the words to say to make her feel better, so he did what he could and hugged her close to him. It only made her sob and clench his shirt in her hands, press her face harder into his chest.

"It'll be okay," he finally answered. "I'll get you away for a little while," he promised. He didn't have anything else to say and usually these words would work if she was feeling sad. She took a few deep breaths and wiped her eyes, praying that she would stop sniffling before she had to go home. He brushed his fingers through her hair briefly before finally letting go.

"Thanks, Itachi," she said as she pulled away from him. She still didn't look good, still didn't look happy, but she had dried her eyes and put on her brave face. He had seen that face so many times, he knew what it meant. She was trying to fight her way through the bad thoughts and dark feelings, and that was all that mattered. As long as she still had some fight left in her, it would be okay.

"I'll see you soon," he promised again, brushing his thumb along her cheek. She closed her eyes, enjoying the intimate touch. He thought this would be a good time to kiss her, but pulled away without doing so. She had never said she wanted him to, so he wasn't going to. He opened the door for her and watched her get into it. She pulled out of the parking lot, knowing he stood there until she turned the corner out of sight.

She drove herself the few short miles home and stayed in the car a few extra minutes before she had to go inside. She felt like crying again, but she couldn't have a crying spell here. Her father would come outside eventually and check on her. She steeled herself and slowly got out of her car, stringing her back over her shoulder. She walked slowly up the stairs and changed her shoes just inside the door. Her father would have already had dinner without her and so she padded up the stairs, sitting heavily in her chair.

She didn't have any more work to do, but she didn't know what to do as she stared blankly at the wall. It was too quiet here and she hated it. She missed her friends immensely and finally realized that she still wore Itachi's sweatshirt. She hurriedly pulled it off her body and stuffed it beneath her pillows. Her father usually checked in on her before eight, and she would be dead if he caught her in a sweatshirt, especially one that smelled like a man. He would assume the worst.

She had just sat back in her seat when her father knocked twice on the open door before moving completely inside the room. His stern eyes watched her and she didn't look at him, merely stood and kept her eyes on the floor.

"Good evening, daughter how was your day?" he asked. Though his words were pleasant, his tone was not and she resisted the urge to flinch at his hard tone. It was always hard. There had never been an ounce of gentleness in this man, even when she was young. It bothered her immensely, but she didn't let him know that.

"It was good, father. I stayed in the library and studied," she answered evenly. She couldn't falter because then he would know she wasn't where she said she was. He noticed every change of body language and questioned her about it, every time.

"Very good, I hope you enjoy your night," he left and closed the door behind him, signaling that it was time for bed. He always did this. It was usually later at night, but he was in a good mood tonight. He always was after an afternoon with a prostitute. She only felt gratuitous for her luck today and fell into her bed. She pushed her hand underneath the pillow and made contact with the sweatshirt. It calmed her mind enough to put her to sleep hoping she wouldn't have as much trouble getting out of bed the next morning.

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 **I'm not taking it down. It makes me laugh too much.**


	3. Chapter 3

**So, half the time I write these one after the other if I have the day off. You want to know how long it takes me? I can write 1,000 words in about 15 minutes and this is about 12,000 words. YOU DO THE MATH.**

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"Do you remember when we met Sakura?" Naruto was asking while they were decorating for the party. Sasuke shrugged. Of course he remembered. It wasn't easy to forget. It had happened the first few days of fifth grade and he and Naruto had taken an instant liking to her. "Remember how she wouldn't talk to us for the longest time?" Naruto wasn't remembering this right.

"She didn't talk to you, idiot," Sasuke wanted to smack him, but he had decorations in his hand and he was on a ladder. There was no way to smack him without taking quite a tumble. "She talked to me from the beginning because I'm not an annoying piece of shit," he grumbled. It was true. Sakura took an instant liking to Sasuke and strayed away from Naruto for a good year and a half.

"Why do you say that?" the blond whined, shoving his hands on his hips. Sasuke swayed on the ladder and shot him a murderous look. He looked sheepish and grabbed the ladder again, keeping it steady. He felt even more foolish now.

"Because she didn't talk to you for a year and a half when we met her," he said flatly. "She was scared of you. You wouldn't shut up and she didn't like that about you. I was a quiet around her and didn't try and make her talk. She only warmed up to you over the years because you're my best friend and you were always around. It was either she get used to you and start liking you or she stop being my friend. She chose to get used to you."

"That doesn't make me sound good," the blond sounded sheepish. Sasuke only rolled his eyes at the wall and began getting down the ladder.

"Well, don't let that girl know about it." Oh, yes. Naruto had finally let slip that he liked a girl and Sasuke hadn't stopped teasing him about it. He had known this was going to happen and had tried his hardest to keep his mouth shut, but after a while it just got too hard and he let it slip. Naruto only shrugged Sasuke off.

"She isn't like Sakura, Sasuke. She's got an easier life." He didn't sound like he was making a jab at the pink haired girl, but Sasuke couldn't help but bristle. It bothered him that Naruto would even say something like that.

"Shut up, idiot," he said, picking up more decorations and moving the ladder along the wall. Naruto glared, not knowing what he did but knowing better than to ask, and grabbed the ladder for Sasuke again. He didn't want him to die, and he could shove his annoyance aside to make sure his friend wouldn't die. Well, seriously injured.

"Hey, Itachi, why aren't you helping us?" Naruto asked when he caught sight of the older man. Itachi was wearing a nice suit and his hair was pulled back into a low ponytail. He wondered why Itachi was already dressed up. It was only noon and the party started at seven. Itachi was putting a small envelope into his jacket and he finished that before turning to Naruto to answer him.

"I'm going to pick up Sakura now, or would you rather she not be in attendance tonight?" he blatantly asked. Naruto flushed and sputtered, taking so long to come up with a response that Itachi had already left. He looked at the empty space left behind and narrowed his eyes. Why did Itachi have to be such an ass all the time? He couldn't get past it sometimes.

"Don't think about it," Sasuke said from the top of the ladder. "It's just Itachi being himself." That didn't help Naruto and his irritation grew. Itachi could be a little nicer, though. He'd known Naruto since he was a little kid. He didn't even think the man liked having him around in any way, not even as a brother. "I told you to stop thinking about it," Sasuke said again.

"I can't. He just pisses me off sometimes," Naruto said, glaring up at Sasuke. Sasuke only shrugged and began climbing down the ladder. He set his hand heavily on Naruto's shoulder.

"He's like that to me too, idiot. There's nothing you can do," he let his hand fall and went to put more decorations up. His mother was a decoration queen and he hated it half the time. Where the hell did she put all these decorations anyway? She also had more for Christmas and Easter. Hell, she had like two full boxes of stuff for New Years, too! They always had to go out every year and buy more shit for her and he still didn't know where she kept it all. She never threw any of it out. Naruto could see him getting annoyed.

"You want me to go up a few times now?" he asked, trying to dissipate the situation. Sasuke only nodded silently and handed him the decorations in his hands. He went to hold the ladder for him and he climbed up, leaning against the wall for more balance. Naruto needed Sasuke's help more than Sasuke needed his. He was a clumsy person and would definitely fall if left on his own for more than half a second.

"Just be excited that Sakura's going to be here tonight," Sasuke said, staring at the wall. He was glad Sakura would be there. She made everything more exciting. There weren't many cousins around that were his and Naruto's age and Sasuke didn't like them much either. There would be a lot of prominent families here tonight as well, but they weren't good to hang around either. Sasuke just had a lot of problems liking people. He liked Naruto and the blond was more than enough for him.

"I am excited. I won't have to deal with Ino for too long," Naruto was happy about that fact. The name caught Sasuke off guard and he looked up at the blond, his mind racing to connect the dots.

"How do you know Ino?" he asked.

"Ino's been coming to these parties for years, Sasuke. I'm surprised you don't know her. She likes you, a lot, and always kind of has. She went to high school with us too. How do you not know her?" Naruto was staring down at him with an incredulous look on his face and Sasuke just shook his head. He didn't want to answer that question. He was thinking. "Seriously, Sasuke," Naruto hopped off the ladder and picked up more decorations, "How the hell do you not know her?"

"I never wanted to. Do you know Hinata likes you then?" he asked. Naruto flushed and only blinked at Sasuke. So Hinata was the girl Naruto liked. He didn't want to do anything with this information, really, but he thought it was interesting. Naruto still hadn't spoken, so Sasuke guessed what he wanted to say. "Ino told me. Apparently one day she'd been looking for you to ask if you and Sakura were dating, but couldn't find you. She decided to piss me off instead when I was trying to be alone before class."

"Oh," Naruto seemed relieved. So he hadn't made it obvious who he was interested in, it was just Ino being dumb. "Honestly I think she was just trying to make up a reason to talk to you. I and Hinata have been talking for a couple months now." He had never given Hinata any indication that he had a thing with Sakura and she would have asked if she was worried. Therefore, Ino had just made something up to talk to Sasuke.

"If I ever dated her I'd have to punch myself," Sasuke deadpanned. Naruto couldn't help but laugh and he shook his head.

"Listen, if you ever dated her I'd punch you too," he couldn't help but continue laughing and had to wait for himself to calm down before he could make the precarious journey back up the ladder. Sasuke just rolled his eyes at Naruto. Of course he'd made himself laugh, he always did. It was a wonder how he didn't piss himself off every now and then.

"Shut up, idiot," Sasuke muttered, returning to hold the ladder for him. Naruto just stuck his tongue out. It wasn't long before they finally finished the room and moved on to the next. Mikoto liked to have every room downstairs decorated, even the bathroom. It was certainly tedious work, but it didn't look tacky. It was just a lot of fake autumn leaves they had to string up and some other more tasteful decorations that were added to it. She didn't do gaudy turkeys or anything of the like. It was nice, at least, just annoying.

They were halfway through the next room when Itachi returned, Sakura in tow. She was wearing a sweater over her usual long sleeved black shirt and her customary long skirt was several different hues of gold, red and orange. It was a flowy skirt that definitely had a lot of layers, but she looked pretty. Even though Naruto couldn't see any of her curves, she still managed to pull her frumpy clothes off. Perhaps that was her superpower. She could make anything look good that wouldn't on anyone else.

"Sakura!" Naruto almost let go of the ladder in his excitement, but he remembered just in time and steadied it before Sasuke could go tumbling down. He climbed down shortly after, allowing Naruto to run to Sakura and envelope her in a bear hug. She was surprised and didn't quite know how to respond, but she didn't need to. It was Naruto. He never realized that she didn't really reciprocate.

"Hi Naruto," she said quietly, prying him off her slowly. "How are you?" he finally broke away from her and fixed her with a million watt smile. She only stared at him, waiting for his answer. He was sometimes slow on the uptake.

"Oh, I'm great!" he finally said, "I just didn't think you'd be able to come today, so I was a little sad. Sasuke and I have been decorating all day. Do you like it?" she had to wade through all of his words before she could come up with an answer to his question. Naruto liked to talk a hundred words a minute and she wasn't the only one that had to play catch up when he finished a statement.

"It's pretty," she said when her brain caught up to his words. He nodded enthusiastically and pulled at her hand, tugging her to see the living room that was already finished. "Like I said," she spoke, trying to hold in a laugh at his actions, "It's pretty." He nodded and tugged her back to the family room. Itachi seemed a little irate; he hadn't wanted Sakura torn away from him but Naruto was a force to be reckoned with.

"What are you going to do now?" Naruto asked, hoping she would stick around with him and Sasuke. Sakura shrugged and looked up at Itachi.

"I'm probably just going to go upstairs with him and hide for a little while," she said, shrugging. Sasuke understood. She needed to get some motivation going so she could actually talk to whoever came to the party. She didn't have much social motivation for things such as this and he understood why she needed it. Sometimes, he needed it too.

"But why?" Naruto whined. Obviously, unlike Sasuke, he didn't understand in the least. Sasuke wanted to hit him over the head, but stopped himself. Sakura often scolded him when he did that and he'd rather just let her explain it to him. He went to find more decorations. They still had another two rooms to decorate.

"Naruto," Sakura sighed, laying her hands on his shoulders. "I am not like you, honey. I cannot do the social things without a bit of peace and quiet first. I must prepare myself. Do you understand that?" she knew he didn't, but hoped talking like that would help him get it.

"Fine. Sakura needs peace and quiet so she can talk to people when they come here," he said. He didn't understand why she needed to do that, but understood that this is Sakura and if she needed to be alone, she needed to be alone. That's how he thought it was and it was good enough for her. She nodded.

"I'll see you later, don't worry," she said sweetly, dropping her hands from his shoulders. He nodded, giving her another bright smile. He bounded off to find Sasuke and Sakura let out a sigh, leaning back into Itachi's body. They wouldn't be bothered at this point and she couldn't help but be glad. Itachi wordlessly led her up the stairs and to his room, allowing her to sit on the bed while he changed. He didn't need to wear this until later and he didn't want to wrinkle it.

"I like your skirt," he said when he sat down beside her. He turned the television on and found something he thought she would like. It was just a thanksgiving special, but she didn't say a word so he thought it was good enough.

"I like it too," she answered, staring down at it. It was just a well blended mix of colors, but it was one of her favorites. She was only allowed to wear it during the fall and hadn't gotten a chance to wear it yet. She didn't like wearing it around her father; he always gave her a weird look when she did. She leaned into Itachi's side and smiled when she felt him wrap his arm around her.

"You look tired," he said quietly.

"I always look tired," she shot back. She wasn't blind to how she looked. There were always dark bags underneath her eyes and there was a look about her that perpetually pointed to fatigue and sleepiness. She couldn't deny it and wondered why he was bringing it up now. The Uchihas had great powers of observation, so she knew he noticed by the way he always brought it up.

"I mean more tired than usual, he elaborated slightly. "If I were to lay you down right now, would you fall asleep?" he asked, wondering. Sakura didn't want to answer his question because she knew, without a doubt, that she would fall asleep within moments. She hadn't been getting much sleep lately. After the night her father had bought sex, he had kept her up all hours of the night and she still had to get up early for school. "Sakura?"

"I would," she said softly. "But I don't want to sleep right now. I want to enjoy my time with you." Itachi was taken by slight surprise. She didn't usually speak her mind like that and he couldn't quite comprehend what she'd just said. It took him a moment of playing catch-up before he could actually answer her.

"Won't you enjoy your time with me if I had my arms around you?" he asked pointedly. She flushed a bright crimson and she wordlessly nodded. She didn't quite know what to say when he said things like that and so did the only thing she could: agree. He gently pushed her down until her head hit the pillow and tried to make himself comfortable as quickly as possible. Once he was, he wrapped an arm around her and brought her close, sharing his heat with her.

"I don't want to sleep," she said softly, watching the program. He only chuckled under his breath and pulled her to lay on her other side to face him. He pressed a kiss to her forehead, the only one he'd really ever tried. She shut her eyes at the small display of affection and pressed closer to him. He was warm and she was always cold. It was nice when he held her.

"Take a nap," he said softly, brushing her hair with his fingers. This usually put her to sleep, whether she wanted it or not. Her eyes still closed, she nodded slowly and was asleep only a few minutes later. Sometimes it was this hard to get her to sleep, but she always took a nap eventually, even if he had to do her favorite things to make it so.

He laid there with her for hours, not wanting to wake her while they still had time. She seemed to really need sleep and he wasn't about to cut it short. He watched her peaceful, sleeping face and enjoyed how calm she looked. When her eyes were open there was so much turmoil and despair hiding within the depths and he couldn't bring himself to look at her sometimes. Sometimes, it was a godsend that she wouldn't look at him. He knew it sounded bad, but he didn't know what to do when she had those looks in her eyes and didn't want to say anything wrong.

She slept just until they had to get ready for the party and that was only because he had to wake her. There was regret in his movements as he quietly called her name and shook her gently around the waist. She woke almost instantaneously, as she was a light sleeper, and she smiled at him, pressing her body to his in an almost hug. This was the only real affection she would outwardly show to others and it made him feel as though the sun shone on him when she did it.

"The party is starting soon, we have to get up," he said, voice slightly muffled by her hair. He didn't mind. It wasn't like he wanted to get out of bed. He was comfortable here. However, they couldn't hide in his room all night. Someone would come looking for them eventually and they had managed to keep their relationship quiet up until now. He wasn't about to jeopardize that.

"Fine," she sighed. She pulled herself up slowly, every bone in her body telling her not to. It wasn't that she couldn't get out of the bed this time; it was who was in it that made her not want to get up. She stretched, her arm not popping back into place. It hadn't been pulled last night and she was thankful for that at least. She wasn't in pain today and any day that happened she thought herself lucky.

Itachi was up with her and changing back into the suit he wore before they took a nap. She watched him, thinking that she liked his body. She had never seen him fully naked, had never really wanted to, but she had seen him without his shirt plenty of times. It made her feel guilty at one point, but she'd gotten past it and just openly watched him now.

"Ready?" he asked, holding his hand out to her. She shook her head, but grabbed his hand anyways and let him pull her up. She followed closely behind him down the hallway and stairs to the living room where there already a whole bunch of family members. She didn't like looking at the sea of black hair; they all looked the same to her. It was enough to catch her off guard and make her question who exactly she was talking to.

"Hey there, little cousin!" Sakura jumped out of her skin at the sudden voice behind them and she turned quickly to see one of Itachi's family members standing there, grinning from ear to ear. He looked excited to see them. "Who's this? I haven't ever seen her before. Is she your girlfriend, little cousin?" he asked. Sakura likened him to Naruto. He talked a mile a minute, but there was certain intelligence in his eyes that Naruto didn't have. Not that Naruto was dumb; this person just seemed too smart for his own good.

"Sakura," Itachi said, narrowing his eyes at his cousin. "No, she isn't my girlfriend, Shisui, just a close friend." Shisui seemed to get even more excited with the knowledge of her name and he began all but bouncing around the room.

"She's so cute! She's so little! How did you manage to come across Itachi, little Sakura?" Shisui was saying. She couldn't help but think his exuberance was a little forced and she instantaneously decided that she didn't like him too much. She hid behind Itachi and wouldn't open her mouth. Shisui looked concerned when he finally calmed down. "Did I do something wrong, cousin?" he asked.

"You're acting like Naruto," Itachi deadpanned. "It put her off. Try acting a little more like yourself. Did you have a red bull or something?" Shisui was extremely hyper. He was naturally exuberant about life, but there were just some times when he took it just a little too far. This was not a time to take it a little too far, not around Sakura. The older man seemed to calm down immediately.

"Sorry, I did have some caffeine." In Shisui language, that meant a lot. "I'm Shisui, how are you?" he stuck out his hand, smiling charmingly at her. She didn't smile back, but she did grasp his hand and shake it. He already knew her name; she didn't need to repeat it. "I love your hair."

"I don't," she muttered, fingering a lock. It was down to her waist and she thought it too long. She wasn't allowed to cut it though. "It's natural," she answered the unasked question. Most people asked if it was natural, they just didn't think it was possible that it could be. She just got the best of both worlds. Her mother had had bright blonde hair and her father deep red. It had merely combined and she wasn't held in high esteem in her church because of it. That's just how it was.

"Well, I think it's pretty," Shisui was walking beside them now, seemingly keeping her company while Itachi talked to family members. He thought her far more interesting in the family members he'd been around for years. It was nice to talk to someone new. "How long have you known Itachi?" he asked, interested.

"I've known Itachi and his family for seven years," she said, shrugging. "I'm not around much, so I'm not surprised you never met me." It was true; she hadn't ever met Shisui in all the times she'd been to the house. He only shrugged it off.

"I was pretty holed up when I was younger, no harm," he said easily, smiling. "I'm glad I met you tonight, though. You are far more interesting to talk to than these old bags." She couldn't help the smile that graced her lips and he beamed at her. He hadn't thought he'd be able to make her smile after putting her off like he did. It made him happy that he could.

"I don't think I'm interesting," she said quietly. He wondered why she wouldn't look at him, but shoved it out of his mind. He reached for her hand, but she winced away from him. He wondered why she would do that. Was it because he was essentially a stranger? He narrowed his eyes at the small girl, but decided saying something would be better than continuing the awkward silence.

"You're far more interesting than anyone else in this room because I have no idea who you are," he said brightly. "I always think its more fun to get to know someone rather than speak to people I already know." Shisui was definitely a people person, she could see that. Since he calmed down, though, she didn't really mind his company all that much.

Itachi was only slightly paying attention to Sakura's and Shisui's conversation, he was too busy talking to an ancient looking woman. He thought it good that Sakura was enjoying herself talking to his cousin. She hadn't tightened her grip on his hand or done anything that would hint that she was uncomfortable, so he was at ease.

"Am I interesting?" Shisui was saying. He was teasing her, trying to get her to say something now. She seemed to have retreated into her shell and wasn't much of a talker when she managed that. She blinked at the floor.

"I think once you calm down you're pretty fun to talk to," she answered honestly. Shisui smiled. He knew that was probably what was going on. She was comfortable around him now when he had toned down his energy and made a mental note of that for the next time he got to spend time with her. "I just wonder how long it will be until you get bored of me," she said flippantly. He was stunned for a moment before understanding. She was teasing him!

"Well, I might get bored of talking to you, but your hair is more than enough to keep me around," he couldn't really see her face, so was distracted completely by her hair. He'd never seen anything like it and couldn't help staring at it. She flushed, hoping he wouldn't see with all her fair in her face and indeed he didn't.

"Well, that's good," she said, "If I'm left alone I tend to get lost, so I'll feel better knowing you'll be following my hair around." He couldn't help but laugh at her quiet wit. She certainly was a snarky one when she wanted to be and it lightened his chest considerably. He no longer worried she didn't like him or that he was saying the wrong thing.

"That's not good. Say, you want to dance?" In her surprise, she looked up at him, speechless. He held his hand out to her and her other hand tightened in Itachi's. Itachi was paying attention immediately, though he didn't quite know why Sakura had tipped him off. He looked at her in worry, but she was still speechless.

"What'd you say to her?" he asked Shisui, watching him like a hawk. Shisui only grinned sheepishly.

"I asked her if I could have a dance with her. I guess she got a little surprised," Shisui laughed. He wasn't nervous and wouldn't take it to heart if she rejected him, but he was bored and wanted to get some of the abundant energy out of his body. Itachi wanted to laugh. Of course Sakura would seize up because someone asked to dance with her.

"Go on, Sakura," he said, pulling her to place her hand in Shisui's. She flushed and could only nod through her speechlessness. She was just completely and totally surprised that anyone would want to dance with her save for Naruto. Naruto was the type to take any chance he could get to embarrass the hell out of her and this would be a great opportunity.

"Come on, I'll see you later, little cousin," Shisui smiled at Itachi, who nodded in response, and he led Sakura into one of the family rooms. This one was dimly lit with soft classical music playing. Most couples present at Mikoto's parties would come here to be by themselves and be romantic, but Shisui wasn't interested in any of that. He just wanted to dance and have something to do with his body.

Sakura was awkward at first. She had obviously never danced with anyone and he found himself smiling and stopping for a moment to arrange her in the way he wanted. She fell in step with him easily after that and he enjoyed her small hands on him. She was a gentle little thing and wasn't overly talkative. It made it easy to enjoy the moment.

"So, Sakura," he started, smiling down at her, "Tell me about yourself." She was silent for a long moment.

"There's not much to tell," she said finally, softly. She dropped her head onto his shoulder, hiding. He wouldn't like talking to her after this. She wasn't an exciting person. Her life was drab and boring and full of so much stress she was in constant fear of exploding, but that wasn't something to tell a new friend. That was something to keep to yourself and shove deep, deep down inside.

"There's got to be something," he said easily, not trying to move her head from his shoulder. It was nice. He didn't try anything, didn't want to, but could enjoy the simple gesture. "Do you go to college? Where do you live? Are you well off? How are your grades if you are in college?" she stopped him after the last question, a small smile on her lips.

"Stop, or I'll never be able to keep all your questions straight," she said softly, a tone of amusement apparent underneath her words. He only kept his mouth shut and waited for her to answer. "I do go to college, though it was hell to get there. I finished a lot of college courses when I graduated high school as valedictorian and so I skipped an entire year with all the credits. I live close to the college with my father and we are pretty well off, anything I've ever needed is there. My grades are still excellent," as they always must be. She almost added the last part, but caught herself. She wasn't about to get too deep unless he asked. He seemed to think before opening his mouth again.

"Why was it difficult to go to college?" he asked, focusing on that. Sakura had to remind herself that he knew nothing about her and she would have to explain it to him.

"I belong to a very conservative and controlling church," she made sure to say the words evenly so he couldn't try and read into her words. "At sixteen I was supposed to marry and have children, but because I am so smart, I applied to the pastor to be allowed to go to college. I had to hold an appointment with him and my principal and my father had to talk him into it. It took six months to get his approval." Shisui nodded. That certainly made getting into college hard.

"That's got to be tough," he said softly, drawing her slightly closer. If her church was conservative and controlling, she must have a lot of grievances to air. He wondered why she didn't leave such a church, but didn't ask her. He knew, from experience, that she would probably defend it to the last breath and he wasn't in the mood to have a fight with her. He was enjoying this time way too much.

"What about this?" he asked, looking down at her clothes. All of her was covered, save for her head and her hands. No one else he knew dressed as such and could point out several girls in this room alone that was showing more than enough skin. He wondered why she wore such things when she was so young. She seemed to draw back into herself slightly and he figured the question was a hot topic she was asked about quite a lot.

"Well, I'm not allowed to wear anything else," she muttered, though he barely caught it. "I have to wear long skirts and my arms have to be covered. That's just how it is." So her church was extremely sexist, was it? He wondered if her father was the same, but didn't ask about it. Perhaps she had daddy issues and he didn't really want to get into that with her right now.

"Your home life doesn't sound like fun," he commented. "It kind of makes me sad," he added. It did. He didn't like the fact that she seemed so meek and shy even though she definitely had a brain in her head. She was smart, had shown that when she teased him earlier and when she told him about her college and high school history. She was too smart to be oppressed and controlled like that and he wondered why she hadn't left yet when she had friends like Itachi.

"It kind of makes me sad sometimes too," she said, staring at his chest. It made her sadder than she liked to admit and he could see it in her body language. He felt terrible that he brought it up and so he spun her in a circle quickly. She laughed and he thought the sudden movement a success. He spun her around again and heard the soft sound of her laugh again.

"How'd you get out tonight if your life is full of rules and etiquette?" he asked as he slowed back down. She rested her head on his shoulder again. She was feeling a little dizzy but wasn't upset that he'd spun her around. She did have a lot of fun. She was hyperaware of his hand on her lower back, but that was just her brain. She couldn't really help it.

"There's a way with Itachi around," she said, cheer showing in her voice for the first time. "My father likes him more than anyone else in his life because he thinks Itachi is like his long lost son. Itachi is very polite and uses the right words when speaking to him, so bending my father to his will isn't hard at all. Itachi can always get me out of the house if he wants to." He could. The way he spoke and showed an almost reverence to her father helped immensely. Her father liked him so much he would give her permission a hundred percent of the time if he was involved.

"Ah, yes, my little cousin is very good at things like that," Shisui said, wanting to laugh. "I'm glad though, or else I wouldn't have gotten to talk to you tonight." He was sincerely glad. He liked anyone Itachi liked and therefore latched onto her immediately.

"You probably made him happy because you gave him a break," she laughed. She meant it in now ill will. "He's usually stuck with me, so you're doing him a favor." Shisui laughed this time and he shrugged.

"Honestly, Itachi did me a favor," he said easily. "I would have been completely bored walking around talking to ancient aunts and uncles. Itachi wouldn't hang out with me; he just wants to talk to them all night. It's nice that he let me borrow his close friend for the night. Though there are the other prominent families coming. They'll be here soon, but I don't like them much, either," he pouted while thinking about it.

"Why not?" Sakura hadn't met any of the other prominent families the year before, but she hadn't exactly been trying to make new friends either. Last year, she'd covered her hair and spent most of the time out on the deck with Sasuke. This was the first time she actually spent a lot of her time inside at one of Mikoto's parties.

"They're all trying to outrich each other," Shisui laughed. "Even to me, and we all know my family is the most powerful and the richest in town, but that wouldn't stop them from trying. That and they like to sit there and make fun of poorer people even if that person is just a little bit less well off than they are. Last year there were a couple girls making fun of a girl out on the deck that looked like she just crawled out of the garbage on the street," Shisui pulled a face. He didn't like that kind of talk. He would rather have nice small talk that didn't insult anyone else.

"That was me," Sakura said softly, flushing and staring at the floor. Shisui felt terrible at this point. He hadn't meant to make her feel bad and wanted to make it better now.

"Well, if it makes you feel any better, I snuck a peek at you and I didn't think you looked homeless," he laughed nervously. "You don't now, either. I think you're a smart young lady held to high expectations that stress you the hell out." He knew he hit the nail on the head when she winced at his words. Obviously she didn't like being reminded of her home life.

"Thanks, Shisui," she said, voice strong. She was glad for his compliment, but not glad for his scary accuracy about her home life. "That makes me feel better," she smiled up at him. At least he liked the way she looked. She didn't really care about what other girls said about her, she never did. She wasn't in a competition with them, even if they didn't know it. She had a life set out for her and it was being thrust upon her. She didn't let anyone else's words bother her.

"I'm glad," he smiled down at her. "Want to sit down?" he wasn't going to sit here with her, knowing she would become quickly uncomfortable with him in the dimly lit room. She nodded and he led her to the other family room that was a little more brightly lit. He sat her down on a couch and left for a moment. "I didn't worry you, did I?" he asked as he handed her a drink.

"No, and thank you," she said, settling back into her seat. He sat beside her and they silently drank their drinks for a long while. He didn't mind the silence at this point. She was good company, talking or not. "So will you tell me something about you?" she asked, looking at him curiously. She was looking at him more and more throughout their time together and he was glad. He thought it meant he was growing on her and didn't mind it if she was.

"I'm working on a doctorate in psychology while I'm working with my Uncle at the family company in the city," Shisui said, open to sharing. Sakura was a little scared that he was trying psychology tactics on her, but put the thought out of her mind. He wouldn't try; he didn't seem to be at least. "I lived here for a little while, but I had to move out. I love Mikoto, but she can be a little overbearing," he grinned.

"Why'd you live here? Why have I never seen you before if you lived here at some point?" she asked, extremely interested now. She had turned her body to him, expressing that she was interested in what he had to say and he was surprised. When she was interested in something, she got a lot more animate and comfortable.

"That's a little private," he laughed, trying to think of a way to say it without giving himself away. "There was just some stuff going on in my house that wasn't good for a kid, so Mikoto and Fugaku took me in. I probably never met you because I mostly kept to myself in my room. Whenever I heard there was someone coming over, I never came out. That was probably you a couple times, but I never heard that you had pink hair. If I had, I assure you that I would have introduced myself earlier." He really did like looking at her hair; it was such a lovely shade of pink and couldn't quite get over it.

"I guess that's a relief," she laughed. She really didn't know what to say. "Why did you get into psychology?" Wow she was really asking the questions he had difficulties answering. Why did she have to be so smart? He wanted to laugh. Of course she would ask the things he had to think about. There was always a certain way to say things so he wouldn't put himself completely out in the open.

"You know how Sasuke has bouts of depression?" he asked, taking the safe route. She nodded. "I wanted to know how to help him and hopefully make those feelings go away for him in the future. I've been using what I've learned on him and it's helped, but I don't have my certification just yet. I have to finish my doctorate before I get it, but that's okay. It was worth it to help Sasuke."

"That's so nice of you," she said, a large smile on her face. "I haven't ever heard of anyone doing something like that for their cousin." She was impressed by the character he possessed and he felt warm knowing he impressed her just slightly. What he'd said wasn't exactly a lie, it was just part of the reason he'd gone into this field.

"He's more like my brother," he said, a smile on his own face. "I've been around Itachi and Sasuke since I was young so it's like they're the brothers I've never had. Itachi is also my best friend, as it happens. We're too different though and I piss him off a lot," he laughed. There had been many a time where he'd pissed Itachi off to the point of no return.

"That's okay. Sasuke has Naruto and Itachi has you. Everyone needs an exuberant friend," she said. He felt better at her words. He had never thought of it like that and it felt just a little better about his friendship with his cousin. It made him feel like it was okay that he pissed him off from time to time. Sakura smiled at the change in his mood. His moods seemed to come and go like the changing of the wind, but she didn't mind. Hers did too.

"How do you make me feel better like that?" he asked, laughing, "I'm the psychiatrist, I'm the one that's supposed to do that," he made her laugh too and she just shrugged.

"I'm smart," she said. He couldn't help the laughter again. The doorbell rang and he groaned. "What's going on?" she seemed very alert and slightly on edge now, whipping her head around the room to stare at the door in alarm.

"Calm down, calm down," he laughed, placing a hand on her shoulder. "It's just the other families. I just hate it when they get here." She nodded in understanding. "Come on, we have to go to the living room. It's a thing." She laughed at his words and pulled herself up. She grabbed his hand on the way out the door, not wanting to be separated from him in the crowd of people. He only smiled at her over his shoulder and led her on.

They found Itachi fairly easily, though Sakura couldn't figure out why. He blended into the sea of black hair and black eyes and wouldn't have been able to find him by herself. Shisui let her hand go and Itachi reached for her. She wasted no time grabbing his hand instead and stood close to him, hiding and peering over his shoulder at the door.

"See, little cousin, I brought her back safe and sound," Shisui was saying, beaming at the small girl. She flushed and Itachi only smiled dryly.

"I didn't think you would harm her, Shisui," was all he said. The music was cut off as Fugaku opened the door and allowed the rest of the guests in. Sakura didn't know who any of them were, but Shisui was whispering into her ear as they came into the door.

"That's the Hyuuga family, the small girl is Hinabi and the older one is Hinata," the one that had a thing for Naruto, she knew, "And their father Hiashi, and his nephew, Neji." The family went off to the side. "That's the Yamanaka family. The girl is Ino, watch out for her and try to run if she tries to talk to you," Sakura couldn't help but laugh at his words. "There's the Nara family. Their son, Shikamaru, he's there," Shisui pointed out the son, "Is a pretty lazy guy, but he's really smart," Sakura nodded. "There's the Inuzuka family, Tsume, their mother, Hana's her daughter, and Kiba is her son." Jesus, how did Shisui remember all these names? She would never be able to even if she was subjected to this several times a year like he was. "There's the Akimichi family, Choza and Choji. That's the last of them, but there's Tsunade, Jiraiya, and Kakashi, old friends of the family." Sakura nodded, but didn't know how she was going to keep all these names straight.

"It's time for dinner now," Itachi said, beginning to pull her to the dining room. Shisui followed closely behind. Itachi sat her at a table and Shisui sat next to her, but he didn't just yet. It was a banquet style dinner and he had to get their plates. "I'm not getting one for you," he said, narrowing his eyes at Shisui.

"I wasn't planning on asking, I just didn't want to leave Sakura to fend for herself," Shisui grinned at the younger man. "Just be happy I'm being a gentleman, like you," he laughed. Itachi only vaguely glared at him before wordlessly turning away.

"I think you made him angry," Sakura said lowly, giggling. Shisui just shrugged.

"That's my job, so he has to get used to it," Shisui shrugged. He liked to annoy the hell out of Itachi. He was showing a lot of emotion tonight and vaguely wondered why, but didn't dwell on it. It was more than enough fun to tease the younger man and piss him off a little. It seemed that Sakura was a hot button for his little cousin, so he didn't mind exploiting it. Someone tried to sit on Sakura's other side, but Shisui waved them off. "That's Itachi's seat, unless you want to piss him off." The person moved away quickly. Apparently Itachi was a force to be reckoned with here.

Itachi was back not even a minute later and placed a plate in front of her, laden with mostly vegetables. She didn't like turkey too much and she felt warm knowing he remembered. He sat down next to her, but Shisui didn't get up yet. Sakura casted a curious glance at him, but he shrugged.

"There are too many people up there for me to get something now," he said. "I'd rather wait a couple more minutes than spend that time in a line." Sakura nodded. She understood his logic.

Shisui finally got up a few minutes later and returned rather quickly with his own plate, sitting next to Sakura again. He looked at her plate and made a face. "How can you eat all those vegetables? Ew." He waited for her to answer, but she didn't. She stared at the table and slowly, daintily ate her food. He was confused and looked to Itachi for an answer.

"She doesn't talk while she eats. You can ask her yourself after dinner," he answered his questioning look without looking up himself. He knew what his cousin was going to ask, he wasn't stupid. Sakura did things differently and she was questioned about it a lot so he inherently knew the answer to things about her.

Shisui looked at his plate and began eating, all but ignoring Sakura at this point. If she wasn't in the mood to talk, then he wasn't going to try either. It was certainly boring, not having her to talk to, but he would get through it. Dinner lasted a while though, and he was quickly bored by the entire thing. He almost wished he could get up, but there wasn't anyone else in the other parts of the house for him to talk to, so his efforts would definitely be proven fruitless.

"Here," Itachi rose and pulled Sakura's plate into his hands, leaving to put them into the dishwasher. Sakura looked at the table still and didn't talk. Shisui wondered if he could ask her a question yet, but didn't want to offend her if he did. He waited until Itachi was back and had sat down, but still didn't say anything. It was up to Itachi to make the first move.

"How was your dinner?" he asked Sakura softly, laying a hand over hers.

"It was good," she answered immediately. So she was talking now? Shisui felt slighted. She would talk to Itachi, but couldn't even utter a word to him. Itachi leaned close to Sakura and whispered something into her ear. At that, Shisui stood and walked away. He had had Sakura's attention most of the night and now she and his cousin were trading secrets back and forth. It was certainly annoying to him. He had made it almost to the outside deck when he felt a little hand close around his. He whirled around to see the pink head of hair, Sakura staring at the ground.

"Itachi told me you didn't understand why I didn't say anything to you," she said softly, afraid to look at him, thinking him mad. She didn't want to anger him, but it was hard not to do when she did things like this out of habit. Shisui was surprised. Was that what he whispered to her? He felt kind of bad now. He thought they were making fun of him or something, playing a cruel joke.

"Is there a reason?" he asked, pulling her out the door into the cool night. He really just wanted to be out of that stuffy house for a minute. He brought her to the railing and leaned back against it while she looked out at the dark garden beyond. He waited for her to talk.

"I told you how my church is very conservative and very controlling. There are strict gender roles I must adhere to and that includes not speaking at the table. I am not allowed to answer unless the head of the house directly speaks to me. I have to clear the dishes and wait at the table until the head asks me about my day. It isn't the same here, I know that, and I can deal with Itachi talking to me first, but everything else is hard," she was crying now, staring at her hands. She was so angry, so upset that she'd been born into this life that meant nothing to her. She wanted to die. She wanted to save herself from any more of this pain and just end it herself, but she couldn't. She didn't even have control over her own life and it killed her on the inside.

"Please don't cry," Shisui's hand was on hers. Her voice had gotten rougher and rougher with each statement she'd spat out and she wasn't calming down any time soon. She was just too upset about all the guidelines and expectations she had to remember and hold herself to. The stress had boiled over and it was being let out now, in this very moment.

"Why? Why can't I cry? Because I'm supposed to be a pretty porcelain doll that feels no pain?" she threw his hand away and turned to him, staring into his eyes and crying so, so much. The tears wouldn't stop at this point and she couldn't calm down. She wanted to explode and make someone else feel the pain and the stress she always had to endure. "I can't cry because I'm not supposed to feel anything that's done to me? None of the shit my father does to me because something wasn't perfect? I'm not allowed to be angry with the hand that life dealt me? Why?" Her anger was broken when she felt his arms around her as he pulled her into his chest.

"You're not allowed to cry because I'll break if you do," he said softly, a smile in his voice. "I hate it when anyone cries and you're no exception, little Sakura." She was surprised at his words. He hardly knew her, only knew the guarded responses she'd given him, but he was trying to quell her tears and her rage, make it okay. She had really only gotten this sort of treatment from Itachi, for he didn't have the words to make it okay, but Shisui did. He was saying the things that were calming her down and making her feel less insane like Sasuke often did.

"I want to die," her voice was so thin and riddled with tears and despair. He hugged her tighter.

"I wanted to at one point too, you know," he said quietly. "It was the easy way out, so don't try it. I don't want the next time I see you to be in a casket," he was trying to make her tears go away and was seemingly saying the right words. "I'm sorry I asked you not to cry," he said sheepishly when her tears stopped altogether; "It was out of selfishness I asked."

"I overreacted," she smiled, the tears making her seem a little broken and forcing toughness out to her outer shell. He shook his head.

"Nah, you're okay. You want to go back inside now?" Itachi was surely missing her presence by now and dinner was over and done with at this point. Sakura nodded slowly and he led her back into the house by placing his hand on the small of her back. Her hair was so smooth and soft and he liked the feel of it just as much as he liked looking at it.

He couldn't spot Itachi through the sea of people at this point, so he just kept Sakura close to his side as he weaved through people. He was stopped by several and he had to go through minutes upon minutes of strained small talk and forced smiles before he could move on, only to be stopped by someone else. Sakura didn't seem to mind too much. No one was talking to her and Shisui was keeping her close behind him, allowing her to hide. It was a comfortable place for her, so she wasn't really worrying. She wondered, for a moment, where Sasuke and Naruto could possibly be, but put it out of her mind for now. They would find her at some point in the night.

Just as she'd put it out of her mind, a shock of blond hair was moving towards her rapidly. She stayed close to Shisui's side and smiled when Naruto emerged from the crowd in front of her, a huge smile on his own face. He wrapped her up in a hug, though she didn't let go of Shisui. He just wrapped up talking to another family member when he finally turned around to see Naruto and Sasuke. Naruto was hugging Sakura and he grinned. Good to know people other than he hugged her from time to time.

"How are you, Sakura?" Naruto asked, that million watt smile on his face. He had finally let her go and she could breathe again. "Oh, Shisui! I thought you were Itachi. Sakura doesn't usually let go of him you know."

"We're looking for him," Shisui laughed. "Sakura just didn't want to get separated from me," he held up their joined hands. "I probably wouldn't be able to find her for a hot minute if we did." Sakura didn't like to think of being separated from her guardian and so moved just a little bit closer to him, showing her nervousness. He ignored it, letting her do what she wanted.

"Well, we haven't seen him either. Maybe he's helping Mikoto clean up!" Itachi usually did that. He liked helping his mother clean up. He didn't like letting women do all the work. Unlike Sakura, the men and women in this family weren't held to strict gender roles and Itachi did everything and anything he could do to help.

"I saw him a while earlier while dodging Ino," Sasuke finally spoke. "He was talking to father and some of the other guys from the company about some deal. I didn't understand it," Sasuke informed them, looking rather bored.

"I wouldn't expect you to," Shisui laughed. "Well, Itachi is henceforth busy for the next hour or so because I know Fugaku won't shut up once you get him rolling about company matters." Sasuke looked annoyed which attested to how true that statement was. Shisui only laughed again. Sakura seemed rather wary and nervous, but he chalked it up to all the unknown people milling around her. That would make him nervous too if he had pink hair.

"So, Sakura, how are you enjoying the party?" Naruto asked, all but bouncing off the walls. "Can I dance with you? I like dancing with you." Sakura flushed and went to smack Naruto on the arm but missed. Sasuke did it for her and she smiled in thanks at him. "OW!"

"Every time you dance with me, Naruto, you always try to embarrass me," Sakura said, only slightly irritated. "Anyways, I already danced with Shisui, so my time allotment for that has been fulfilled." She was using Shisui to get out of Naruto's clumsy ass dancing, but, from a sneaky look to his eyes, he didn't seem to mind it at all, he was even laughing.

"Sorry I stole that from you, little cousin," he said, placing his hand on top of Naruto's head. Naruto batted him away, looking at him reproachfully.

"I'm not even your cousin, Shisui!" he said, looking rather annoyed. Sakura laughed. She had never seen Naruto look as annoyed as he did now and it certainly was a sight to see. Shisui grinned at the younger man and just shrugged.

"I grew up with you as well as Itachi and Sasuke. From that standpoint, it does make you my cousin," Shisui said triumphantly, earning another giggle from Sakura. She certainly was enjoying herself, even if she wasn't really talking. Hearing Naruto bicker it out with someone was always funny, but Shisui was bickering back and doing it wittily, unlike Sasuke would have. Sasuke never tried to use wit against Naruto, but he didn't find the amusement and fun in bickering with him like Shisui did.

"I don't think that means anything," Naruto pouted, looking away from Shisui. Shisui only rolled his eyes and ruffled Naruto's hair again.

"So, Naruto, have you managed to talk to your crush yet today?" Sakura asked. She was teasing him and everyone but Naruto saw it. His face fell and he looked at the floor, slightly dejected, and sighed.

"Her cousin and her father won't let her and her sister out of their sight, so I can't get anywhere close. I want to talk to her, but she can't get away from them." If he had a chance to talk to her, he wouldn't be here fighting with Shisui and feeling bad about his love life, now would he? Sasuke nudged his shoulder.

"Come on, I'll help you distract them so she can get away," Sasuke said, already melting into the crowd. Naruto gave off a whoop of excitement and followed his best friend through the crowd. Sakura watched them go, shaking her head.

"This is definitely going to be hilarious, but I don't even want to watch," she sighed. She didn't think it was going to work and they would tell her all about it even if she saw the entire thing, so she thought it better to stay back. Shisui shrugged, still staring after them as they made their way to the family.

Suddenly, Itachi had appeared out of nowhere and had her hand in his. She looked up at him, flashing him a bright smile, but didn't let go of Shisui just yet. She had really enjoyed his company up until now and didn't want him to leave just yet.

"How have you been without me?" Itachi asked, bending low so she could hear him.

"It's been fine," she said, the smile still on her face. "Shisui hasn't left me alone and Naruto and Sasuke came to say hello to me. Shisui got me out of a dance with Naruto," she laughed. Itachi was thankful to Shisui. It wasn't often Sakura would speak so carefree and smile and laugh so often, but somehow his cousin had managed to make it come about.

The doorbell rang and Sakura flinched at the sound. It kept ringing, causing other people to look up from their conversations to the door. Sakura hid herself behind Itachi, her hands tight on both their hands and she pressed her face into Itachi's shoulder. He let her do it and Shisui only looked at her, mildly concerned. Fugaku finally opened the door and Itachi wished he hadn't.

"Where's my daughter?!" the voice of her father caused fear to spear her through and she let out a whimper, hands clenching the two so tightly they both looked to her. "I want my daughter! I know she's here!" her father was obviously drunk and Sakura obviously didn't want to go to him while he was. She was scared and couldn't move.

"Take her upstairs," Itachi whispered to Shisui. He pried her fingers away from his and he whispered in her ear that Shisui would take care of her before moving quickly to the door. Shisui sprang into action and began pulling her towards the back stairs, trying his best to keep her out of the door's line of vision. Her father's drunken yells followed them up the stairs and they could hear him outside the house.

"Dear god, little Sakura, who the hell was that?" he asked as he led her away from the scene, only to realize she was limping heavily. How had he never noticed that before? He stopped pulling her. "Are you alright? You're limping."

"I just stepped wrong," she said roughly, knowing she had to answer him. He stooped and pulled her into his arms. "I'll take you to my little cousin's room." Sakura only nodded.

"Why do you call your cousins little?" she asked, staring at the passing wall. "Why do you call me that?" she was trying to distract herself by asking him questions and he seemed to understand that. He smiled and answered her questions easily.

"They're all younger than me and it pisses them off," he answered cheerily. "I call you little because you're all tiny and stuff." He smiled down at her, but she wasn't looking at him. Apparently trying to cheer her up was not going to go well today. He made it to Itachi's room and put her on the bed.

"Are you going to leave?" she sounded fearful. She didn't want to be alone, not right now. He shook his head, sitting next to her and picking up the remote. He found a Charlie Brown special and hoped she'd like it. She didn't seem to have any qualms about it, just staring blankly at the screen.

"So, little Sakura, how long has your father been abusing you?" he asked, not sparing a glance at her. She spluttered and flushed, becoming too tense and too still within a moment. He knew he was correct because this was her reaction the last time he'd gotten something very correct. "Mine abused me," he said nonchalantly, as if she had answered him, "I ran away from home at sixteen. You want to know why?" He didn't get an answer. "He was a mean drunk. He beat me up a lot and didn't care about it."

"Since I was five," he barely heard her soft answer to his original question. Sakura didn't know why he was doing this. Her world was crashing down around her and she asked herself why he had to ask her these things. She didn't understand his thought process behind it all.

"Sakura, come on. I'm just trying to be nice. From one abused kid to another," he matched her tone and placed a hand over hers. She winced and looked down at it before opening her mouth to say something else.

"You had the strength to run away," she murmured. He was surprised by her words. He wouldn't use the word strength to describe what he did.

"It wasn't strength," he said lowly, "I thought it was cowardly, on my part. I thought it was my fault, that he beat the shit out of me I mean. I still have the scars," he pulled up his shirt and showed her a long thin scar from his neck to his stomach. "He almost killed me that time and I made it worse so I wouldn't have to wake up."

"Oh." She didn't have words to say like he did. She couldn't think of anything else but that and she thought herself a terrible person to talk to about this. Shisui was much better. He knew what to say and when to say it, so unlike her.

"How bad did yours hurt you?" He fixed her with a stare she recognized. She saw pity and worry and, for once, understanding. The understanding look in his eyes is what made her turn her back to him and lift her sweater and shirt up, allowing him to see the marred skin of her lower back. "Damn," he reached out, pressing his fingertips gently to her back, tracing scars, unhealed cuts, and bruises. She jumped, but didn't pull her clothing back down. "Does Itachi know?"

"Don't tell him," her voice was far braver than how she actually felt. "I don't know what he'll do if he finds out," she didn't want to think about it either. She had spent the better part of seven years keeping this from him and she wasn't about to stop now.

"He'll kill your father, silly Sakura. I have half a mind to do exactly that." He reached for a bandage across her side and pulled it back. This one had to have happened within the last day or so. It was a burn, at least second degree if he'd had to guess. The skin had been stripped away and the wound was red and angry. "Come on, we have to redress these," he said, pulling himself up and offering his hand. He led her to one of the many hidden bathrooms in the huge house and redressed her wounds with practiced ease. She felt a little uncomfortable taking her shirt off around him, but got over it quickly. He was doing her a favor.

"Thank you," she said after she pulled her shirt back on.

"Don't wait for him to put you in the hospital, cream puff," he said affectionately, petting her head, "Get away from him before that happens." He would definitely go after the man if he hear he'd put Sakura in the hospital. He felt bad thinking about it like that, but knew he wouldn't regret it if it came down to it.

"He needs me, it's just when he drinks too much," she said dejectedly, pulling herself up. She wanted to go back to Itachi's room, where she felt safe. Shisui took her back gladly and sat back on the bed with her.

"You should tell Itachi about it, though," he said thoughtfully. "This isn't something you can keep from him, especially if it's getting worse. Itachi notices everything and he's probably already pretty curious about what you're hiding under your skirts and long sleeves." Sakura flushed and shook her head.

"It's been seven years, I'm quite sure I don't have to tell him," especially when she was going to be married off eventually and would never see him or her best friends again.

"You haven't known him your entire life, dearest," he grinned at her. Sakura only shook her head. "Anyways, I think Itachi's coming," he could hear footsteps on the stairs. "If you need me, I'll be around." He smiled at her and she smiled back at him. He didn't like that smile. It looked as though she was trying to hold herself together.

"Bye, Shisui," she said, holding his hand for a brief moment.

"Bye, cream puff." He walked out of the room and went for the stairs, passing Itachi on the way, who nodded at him. His cousin looked a tiny bit pissed, but he didn't think it was at Sakura, so he wasn't really worried about it.

Sakura was lying on the bed when he walked in and he went straight to his close to pull out pajamas and get out of the stuffy suit. "Your father punched me. My father called the cops and he was booked on charges of assault," Itachi said gruffly. Sakura didn't know what to say and waited for him to turn around. When he did, she didn't like it. His left eye was quickly turning black and blue and it sickened her to the bone. It was okay when her father beat her, she could deal with it, but this was Itachi.

"Alright," she finally said. She didn't know what was going to happen next.

"He'll be in a holding cell for a couple days until a judge can see him. He'll probably post bail after that," Itachi said, crawling into bed beside her. She settled into the curve of his body and rested her cheek on his chest watching him. "So you don't have to go back for a few days, though I wish you never would." She was speechless for a moment. He never spoke like that.

"I can't leave him, Itachi, he needs me," she said softly. Without her he couldn't feed himself and the house would be a mess. Without him she had no life and no one to protect her. No one would want her if she ran away, that had been drilled into her head from the time she was born. Itachi only narrowed his eyes at the ceiling and brought her closer.

"If he does anything, let me know," he said darkly. She thought he knew for a moment, thought Shisui said something, but calmed down when she realized he hadn't. Itachi wouldn't be lying in bed with her, arms around her, if he had found out. He would have gone out to the police station and added to her father's charges. "Promise me."

"I promise," she said softly, laying her head back down on his chest. She knew she couldn't keep this promise, but Itachi seemed to have calmed at this point and for that she was glad. If she could just put him off until her destiny came to take her away, she would be happy. She didn't want to worry him with things he couldn't change and felt slightly terrible that she was keeping such things from him, but didn't really mind either. There was enough weighing on his mind without this.

Although her mind was once again plagued by harrowing thoughts, she managed to close her eyes and sleep while in the calming embrace of Itachi's. She didn't want to. She wanted to keep talking to him, but knew now wasn't the time. She only let herself drop into a rather restless sleep, filling with nightmares she didn't think about in the waking world.


	4. Chapter 4

**Guys, guys, there was another one. It made me laugh more. Who hurt you child? Why must you leave comments on fanfics when there's much better things to do, like leave horrible comments on youtube videos? That's more fun.  
**

 **Who hurt you, child? lol.**

 **I felt bad for taking the original down so I be WORKING to get this shit out.**

* * *

She was stuck in her head and couldn't wake up, nightmares of her past playing on a constant reel, a movie she didn't buy the tickets to. It started with the time her mother left and the days surrounding it. It was the blackest memory that hid in the darkest corners of her mind. It was the memory that she tried her hardest to forget, the best fuel for the raging fire that was her nightmares.

Her mother had never been a loving and caring mother that was for sure. She was a cold, hard young woman, at least from what she remembered, and never showed her any amount of gentleness in the years leading up to her departure. Sakura remembered, so very vividly the night before the woman had left.

Her father had been beating her mother again. Extremely drunk and without any control over his emotions, he attacked the woman like he would do almost every night. He smacked her to the floor and kept hitting her and punching her over and over as Sakura was made to watch in the doorway. She wasn't allowed to leave and if she made a sound, her father would go after her too. Her father tore her mother's clothes apart and began raping her, the woman screaming all the while.

"No! Stop! Do it to her instead!" the words got her a smack to the mouth and Sakura was scared. She hadn't understood what the words meant when she'd been a young girl, but the meaning became clearer when she grew. Her mother had been trying to offer her up to the man to be raped and hatred formed deep within her heart for the woman, even more than what she already felt.

Her mother had lain on the floor after, covered in her own blood and Sakura had been tasked with cleaning her up. She did so quietly when the angry woman turned her face to the young girl, uttering words she would never forget, the words that haunted her sleeping world so many years later.

"He should go after you. You're the reason for all this," she glared at Sakura with all the hatred she could muster and Sakura hadn't reacted, only finished cleaning her off. She wasn't allowed to react at the biting words. She had been taught to respect those older than her and therefore didn't try to retaliate. She finished cleaning up her mother and helped her into bed before going to her own.

The next night her mother was gathering things from around the house. Anything with value was in a backpack. Sakura watched her take jewelry, wads of money from behind drawers and from underneath her bed, fine silverware and china, any expensive paintings from around the house. She loaded her car up with as much as she could, anything that she could sell.

Sakura was crying when her mother was about to leave. "Don't cry," she'd said bitterly, "You'll be beaten if you do. There's no one here to protect you anymore, so it's time to start being brave." She didn't say she loved her. Sakura knew she hated her. She watched her mother peel out of the driveway and hated her for it. Even at that young age, she knew her mother should have taken her with her.

Sakura was bloody and broken that night, her father's rage unable to be contained after he came home to no wife. He blamed her for not stopping the woman, called her the problems in the marriage, told her he wished she'd never been born. She only silently picked herself up and cleaned herself off like she'd done so many times for her mother and made her way to bed where she fell asleep for the longest in her life.

Sakura couldn't contain her sorrow at the nightmare that had pushed her way into her head. She held her head in her hands, pushing herself into a dark corner of her mind. She tried to wake up, she tried so hard, but she couldn't. Something was stopping her and she couldn't get herself to move past all the memories that presented themselves as nightmares. They beat her head and made her pay attention to them and the feeling of despair was quickly falling over her.

* * *

He knew she had nightmares. She'd had several in the week she stayed with him while her father had been in jail. She would scream and throw everything about in her sleep and would wake him easily. He had called her name and shook her gently; she would wake eventually and burrow herself into his chest, crying uncontrollably.

There were a couple times she just wouldn't stop crying. The one night, she'd been crying for an hour before he went looking for help, and he had taken her to Sasuke in an attempt to help. He didn't have the words to say to her to make it better and he knew Sasuke did. Sasuke had these own problems, but a hug was often enough for him.

"What's wrong with her?" the younger man had asked when he took her into his arms. He brought her to the bed and cradled her, brushing her hair out of her face and pressing her into his chest. Itachi felt slightly jealous watching his brother cradle the young woman, but he pushed it down. He sighed.

"I believe it was a nightmare," was all he said. Sasuke nodded. Itachi went back to the hallway, waiting. It wasn't even ten minutes later when Sasuke called him back in. Sakura was staring blankly at his neck while he still cradled her to his chest.

"She'll be okay now," Sasuke said, letting his brother pull her easily back into his arms. Itachi could only nod in thanks and pulled her tightly to his chest and walked back to his room. She slept soundly for the rest of the night and for that he was glad.

The second time, he hadn't even been in the room when it started and was slightly late in waking her up. He'd been talking with Shisui downstairs when they heard a little commotion from above. He had almost run upstairs, Shisui hot on his heels and found Sakura on the floor, still asleep, crying and screaming and writhing in her sleep. Itachi set about waking her up and she, yet again, shoved herself tightly into his embrace, tears falling immediately. She cried and cried and he didn't know what to do, but then Shisui came to his aid. He knelt beside them and pulled her into his chest instead. Itachi didn't want to let her go, but his cousin seemed to know what to do. He cradled her, keeping her secure.

"Itachi, please," Shisui had said, giving him a look. Itachi knew what that meant. Shisui would give him that look when Sasuke was freaking out and he couldn't calm him down. It meant please leave so I can do my psychiatry shit. Itachi only nodded, resting a hand briefly on her head, and left the room, closing the door. Though he was unhappy he couldn't help her himself, he was glad Sasuke and Shisui were around to say the words he couldn't come up with.

Shisui poked his head out the door when everything was calm, Sakura behind him. She had run straight into his arms when she had the opening and pressed herself firmly to his body, hugging him tightly. He could only wrap his arms around her and give Shisui a questioning look. He only shrugged, gave him a smile, and left down the hallway.

Sakura hadn't left him leave that night. She was pressed to his body every second and her hand was in his, squeezing tightly until she fell asleep. She wanted him around. She knew he didn't have the words to say, but he comforted her best with his physical attention. She had kissed his cheek that night, the first time ever. He had only pulled her closer and molded his body to hers, arms tight around her. She had slept better with his arms around her and didn't have another nightmare that night.

These memories were clear in his mind the couple weeks later, just before Christmas. He hadn't seen or heard from her and it was wreaking havoc with his mental health. Was she okay? Did something happen to her? He couldn't think of what could have possibly happened. He had even given up his pride and asked Sasuke and Naruto if she was looking well. They said she looked tired, as always, but was fine other than that. He took little comfort in this and so just stared at his phone, waiting and praying that she would text him, call him, something.

Sighing, he grabbed the folders he'd taken home with him the night before and headed down the stairs to his car. He'd been working quite a lot over the past couple of weeks. Without Sakura around, that's all he could really do. He passed Naruto and Sasuke in the kitchen without so much as a hello.

"Where's he off to?" Naruto asked Mikoto, who was bustling around the kitchen.

"Work. That's all he's been doing lately," she looked after her eldest son wistfully.

"Have you told him yet?" Sasuke asked, raising a brow. He thought she would have by now and instead of heading to work, he would be, very angrily, heading to the hospital.

"It's a very delicate thing to tell someone, especially Itachi," she said softly, bracing herself on the countertop. Remember when Shisui was in the hospital and he found out? He couldn't deal with it and exploded in anger. I have to make sure Shisui is here and you're around in case that happens again. You two are very able in the way of talking him down from anger," she was trying to be gentle and delicate, but the two boys didn't seem to understand that very well.

"Fine," Sasuke said. He understood better than Naruto, who didn't understand body language or most social cues. It didn't matter. "We're going to the hospital right now. I have no doubt Shisui's there already, so we'll bring him back with us." Mikoto nodded, thinking that was good. Itachi would probably be home about that time, too.

"Let's get going then!" Naruto was already out of his seat, wanting to go right this second. Sasuke followed slowly behind and watched Naruto hop into the car. He sat heavily behind the steering wheel and started driving off towards the hospital. It was a little bit of a drive, but he didn't mind. It was for her.

They walked into Sakura's room to find Shisui sitting beside her, hand on hers and singing to her. Sasuke scoffed. "Why are you singing, Shisui? She's in a coma, she can't hear you." Shisui didn't answer, merely finished his song. Sasuke was upset with the world having problems accepting that this was life right now. Shisui couldn't hold it against him. He was sad and upset and didn't explode as much Itachi would, so he couldn't really be upset.

"She wasn't resting easily," Shisui responded. Sasuke didn't ask how he knew that, but didn't really want to know. Shisui was still watching her. Sasuke wondered if his cousin was in love with her, but didn't ask, again. He only narrowed his eyes at him, watching him. Naruto moved into the room and walked to her bed, touching her other hand. It was completely silent now, the only noise the hiss of the ventilator helping her breathe.

"She looks so small," he said sadly. His voice was so very quiet and it scared Sasuke. He had never heard Naruto talk so soft and low and it bothered him. "Why would she do this to herself?" he asked no one in particular.

"The wounds are self inflicted," Sasuke said, moving to stand beside Shisui. He brushed his fingers along her wrist, hating all the tubes coming out of her. He wanted to rip them out and wake her up forcefully, but knew that would never work. "They said that she hit her head when she passed out from the bloodloss and that's what put her into the coma." Shisui brushed a few strands of hair out of her face and didn't say a word.

"But why?" Naruto's voice and eyes were tortured. He slumped in his chair and thrust his hands in his hair, staring at the floor in frustration. She'd been hurting for so long, especially if she ended up here. Could they have stopped it? Done something to help her? Probably, but they'd been blind to the warning signs or ignored them so they could believe she was just fine.

"Who knows, Naruto?" Sasuke couldn't come up with any other words and Shisui was just being too silent. His hand held a deathly grip over Sakura's and he just wouldn't look away from her face. Sasuke looked at his cousin in worry. "What's wrong, cousin?"

"Is this what I looked like?" he asked, voice strained. "Is this what it felt like to be you and Itachi, staring down at me and hoping I would wake up? It feels so hopeless and I can't stop thinking of things I could do to keep her from ending up here. I feel so regretful. I wish there was a way that I could take everything back and save her from this," he sounded tortured too.

"Yes," he answered, "but you woke up and she will too. It's Sakura. She's strong. She fooled us into thinking she was doing fine when she was falling apart. She'll be okay, Shisui, don't give up." Shisui wanted to smile, but couldn't make his lips move. It wasn't often the roles in his and Sasuke's relationship were switched, but it was one of those rare times. He always seemed to forget that Sasuke always had these dark feelings at the back of his mind and so knew the words to say to calm other's minds.

"Are you going to keep her away from her father after all this?" Naruto asked after a few long moments of silence. Shisui's eyes turned dark and his grip tightened on her hand.

"If Itachi doesn't after this, there's no way in hell I'll allow her to go back there," he said darkly. Naruto was surprised by Shisui's changing mood. He thought, now, that Shisui might have feelings for Sakura, just as Sasuke did. He didn't put it out of his mind and reason through it like Sasuke did, though. He held fast to the idea. Before he could say anything, a nurse came in to do her usual hourly checks.

"How is she?" he couldn't help but ask. He always did. He couldn't stop himself. He wanted to know how her condition was and if she was going to wake up soon. He couldn't wait to see her green eyes open after so long of seeing her pale, little form in the hospital bed. Shisui didn't turn, but Sasuke did, eager to hear the nurse's response.

The nurse was writing things down when she answered. "Well, the brain scans are fine, there's still a little less function than normal, hence the ventilator, but we're pretty much waiting for her to wake up. She might not want to just yet, though, so please be patient," she punctuated her statement with a smile to Naruto.

"What do you mean by she might not want to wake up?" he was visibly upset, but it didn't seem to bother the nurse much. She probably got stuff like this all the time and it just didn't surprise her anymore. She didn't answer; however, it was Shisui who said something.

"She went through a horrible trauma, Naruto," Shisui said quietly, just watching Sakura in the bed. "Her mind doesn't want to let her wake up because it's playing catch up. It's trying to cope before throwing her into a world she won't understand. Sometimes people like Sakura have already given up and they won't ever wake up because they don't want to be here." The nurse was nodding, putting all her little tools away. She didn't say anything as she walked out of the room.

"Why wouldn't she want to wake up, though?" Naruto was really having problems coming to terms with all of this, even with Shisui's calm words. Shisui didn't answer at first, having to think through his words before telling him what he thought. He didn't want to tell him anything that Sakura wouldn't want him to say, coma or not.

"You don't know what happens behind closed doors," was all he said. He meant that when she went home, they didn't know what happened and what would happen when left alone with her terrible father. Sasuke seemed to inherently understand his cousin's words, but then again he was an Uchiha and didn't need to ask really. Naruto, however, was a different story.

"What does that mean, though?" he asked, his frustration causing his voice to be louder than it meant to be.

"Calm down, moron," Sasuke narrowed his eyes at Naruto, who looked sheepish. "It means her father finally snapped and beat her so badly she went into a coma and her brain is trying to make sense of it all before letting her wake up," Sasuke tried to explain it to Naruto in the simplest words he could think of. He stared at him and the idiot seemed to understand, finally.

"So when do you think she'll wake up?" he asked sadly. Shisui and Sasuke were about to hit him upside the head. They'd been having the same conversation with him, over and over. Sasuke took a deep, deep breath before answering.

"No clue, Naruto," he finally said. "Could be days, could be weeks, the doctors couldn't even tell you," Naruto picked up Sakura's chart and began reading through it. Sasuke and Shisui just let him do it. It seemed to take the idiot a little longer than usual, but Naruto had never been good with reading in the first place and there were a lot of big words he didn't really understand.

"Hey, Sasuke, look at this," Sasuke walked to stand beside him and looked at Sakura's chart. "This says she was sexually active not long before she was brought in. Do you know who Sakura could possibly have sex with? I thought she was a virgin." Naruto was confused. He had never heard Sakura talk about anyone she was remotely interested in let alone would want to get down and dirty with. "What's a rape kit?" he pointed to the words, confused again.

"It means what it says," Shisui said, voice dark. "She was raped and they checked her over and took DNA from her to try and match to someone so they can be charged for sexually assaulting her." Naruto just stared at Shisui and Sasuke just shook his head. Sasuke had known what it was, of course, and he couldn't help the anger that rose inside him. Whatever he was feeling, though, was nothing in comparison to Shisui, only judged by the raged look on his face.

Naruto didn't seem to notice the angry atmosphere and flipped the page up. He almost gagged at what he saw. "What the hell?" He wanted to throw the chart across the room. Shisui didn't react to Naruto's outburst. He already saw it, the night he found out. He had seen the chart, seen the diagrams, and the rage was still in him.

Sasuke grabbed the chart from him and flipped through the last pages, feeling quite sickened. "Fuck," he placed the chart back where it belonged. He didn't want to look anymore. He stared at the small girl in the too-big bed for several long minutes, wondering and thinking again. He was back to wondering if she would ever wake up. He checked his phone before putting it back in his pocket and he sighed.

"Should we go home?" Naruto asked, eyes still fixed on Sakura. The hiss of the ventilator was starting to grate on his nerves, but he didn't want to leave want to leave just yet. Sasuke shrugged and Shisui didn't react.

"There isn't much we can do here. We have to tell Itachi anyways and that's a whole other issue," Sasuke looked down at his phone, thinking for a few long minutes. Itachi would be home soon, there wasn't much to take care of at the office lately because he'd been working so much. He sighed and looked the door. "We should go." He looked to Shisui. "You should come with us, or Itachi will blow up the entire block," he said. Shisui didn't seem to react. Now that Sasuke looked at him, he wondered if he ever looked this tired. He stood without a word and led them out of the door.

Sasuke didn't think Shisui would be much help in this situation as he drove behind his cousin back home. Shisui was obviously feeling responsible for something and Sasuke couldn't think what. He was tortured and having problems seeing her like that. He didn't explode and yell at the world, but he was imploding and blaming himself for everything. It bothered Sasuke. Shisui was the one that could talk through anything and make it seem like everything will be okay. Seeing him like this made him think he wouldn't be much help when dealing with Itachi.

They could hear Mikoto talking just as they walked in the door. Sasuke nudged Naruto towards the stars. "Go. You'll never survive if you don't." Naruto only nodded and quietly walked up the stairs. Naruto had never been a good mediator and probably would never be. Sasuke and Shisui walked slowly and quietly into the kitchen. His mother saw him and instantly shut her mouth, Itachi sitting at the island. The two men stood behind him on either side.

"What's going on," Itachi was suspicious. His mother had said she needed to talk to him, but wouldn't just come out with it. She was just making silly small talk and dancing around the issue. He realized she'd probably been waiting for Sasuke and Shisui to show up because she had stopped talking the moment they came in. He was more suspicious now because there was an aura around them. It was dark and there was a slight feeling of sadness around them. He couldn't think why.

"Sakura's in the hospital, Itachi," Mikoto said after several long moments. The world seemed to stop for him and he couldn't quite wrap his head around it. In the hospital? How did she end up there? How long had she been there? Why had no one told him? Did Sasuke and Shisui just come back from the hospital? Why didn't they tell him? "She's been in a coma for the better part of a week now," her voice was so soft, so quiet, trying to be comforting, but he was quickly becoming angry.

"Why didn't you tell me when it happened?" His hands were clenched, knuckles white with the strength he exuded. His voice was quiet but barely constrained, eyes so dark they were bottomless pits of anger and burning questions. "You should have told me." Both men standing behind him could clearly hear the frustration and barely contained rage.

"Nothing will help her," Sasuke spoke up. "She's in a coma, Itachi, we were hoping she'd wake up before we told you," he placed a hand on his brother's shoulder and the older man tensed minutely. Sasuke berated himself. This conversation should have been held days ago, but here they were. Shisui wasn't even being much help. He was staring at the floor, clenched hands shaking, and Sasuke thought he was about to cry.

"It doesn't matter, Sasuke," Itachi's voice was venomous. "I should have been told." Mikoto could tell her son was angry by this point too and she thought of anything she could say to calm him the absolute hell down.

"Hush, Itachi," her voice was soft and smooth, "They were just following my instructions. It was my fault no one told you and I'm sorry for that."

"I want to see her," he stood, but Sasuke and Shisui stopped him. They couldn't let him go. He would never leave her bedside if he did and they worried about him if that happened. Shisui didn't seem to want to say anything, but he swallowed his guilt and his anger and forced something out.

"I have been beside her every single day, cousin. You don't want to see her. She doesn't look like Sakura," these words were killing him and the feelings that came along with it were threatening to unhinge him. He hadn't felt so much guilt and rage for years, had forgotten how so very bad it felt. Itachi tried to shoulder past them, but Sasuke caught him and shoved him back, using most of his strength.

"Will you stop, Itachi? Think logically, there's nothing you can possibly do that Shisui, Naruto, and I haven't already done. It took Naruto the last few days to understand there's nothing to be done. Are you as dumb as Naruto?" he raised a skeptical brow to his brother. He shrugged him off and stood there, glowering at the two. Sasuke was right, he supposed. Mikoto sighed, slightly relieved, and forced a smile at them.

"Why don't you boys go get Christmas trees for the party?" The party was four days away and she had pretty much forgotten all about them. She was just trying to distract them from the ailing girl first and foremost and they knew it. They didn't have a problem with it, though. Sighing, all three of them silently walked out the door.

* * *

She was still stuck in that dark world, reliving her worst nightmares, the one that rarely even bothered her when she slept. She was trying to cry, scream, something to make someone notice her and force her to wake up, but she couldn't utter a sound and no one came to wake her. She felt stuck, floating somewhere between sleep and waking, but she couldn't do either, and she couldn't stop the nightmares.

She remembered every single time her father beat her. Half the time she hadn't cleaned well enough, there was a speck of imaginary dust somewhere in the room he was in and he was so angry about it, he went to her and beat her senseless. The pain didn't lessen each time and she wasn't allowed to defend herself, it would only get worse. It always got worse, no matter what she did.

When she was young, she hadn't been a good cook, but she was expected to cook him every meal. She had never understood why he made a five year old girl cook for him, but he had. She had burned herself on the stove several times, but would never bring her to the hospital. She was too small to carry the heavy pots and would often get boiling water all over herself, but she was never treated. He would only tell her that she had to get better and fast.

In those early days, he didn't like what she made. A lot of the time she would end up with the hot food all over her because he threw it at her face and he would make her clean everything up after, watching her closely. If she didn't do it exactly how he wanted it, he would kick her to the ground and beat her black and blue, leaving her there to pick herself up and clean her body off before bed. There was always a sick look of pleasure in his eyes while he did, gaining satisfaction from beating his daughter to the brink of death. She thought it was something she did and just had to be better for him, but it never ended. There was nothing she could ever do to make him happy.

He would break dirty plates over her head if she didn't do the dishes fast enough and would throw the rest at her. She had been speared by knives and forks, shards of glass and porcelain were probably still under her skin somewhere even after all these years later. He would yell at her the entire time.

"Why can't you do anything right, no one will ever want you as their wife!"

"Why didn't you have dinner ready for me on time?"

"Why isn't this place clean? You're so useless!"

The memories swirled around in her head until she retracted further into her mind, hiding herself in a corner. All of a sudden, she was five years old again, hiding and crying in a closet while her father looked for her. She knew he would come, he always did. He always found her. He would beat her once she woke up and the knowledge of that was tearing her apart. She squeezed her eyes shut and thrust her hands over her ears, trying to block out all the terrible memories. They were always there, though, beating against her walls and trying to get in. They always managed to get past and she cried, but she couldn't make herself emit any noise. She wanted to wake up, but the nightmares wouldn't let her. She was stuck.

She heard a soft sound coming her way, feeling so much different than the noises and memories around her. It was a soft baritone voice singing. She couldn't make out the words, but didn't really care. The soft voice made the memories leave her alone and turned her eyes dry. It filled her with warmth and she was able to feel calm for the first time since she entered this dark place. She closed her eyes and found that she could actually rest. She knew when the singing stopped the memories would be back, but that's okay. The few minutes of relief she had now were more than she could ask for.

* * *

They were decorating the house for Mikoto a few days early because she was just trying to keep them busy. They didn't really mind, but it really did feel like busywork and knew what she was trying to do. They couldn't be too angry, at least she was coming up with something for them to do, but they just wanted to sit down and talk about Sakura.

There were six trees in all and Itachi was currently pruning them like he always did, Sasuke and Shisui just putting up thousands of lights around the house, Naruto outside in the cold doing the garden. No one ever liked doing the garden, so they usually made Naruto do it. Sasuke was up on that old rickety ladder again, wondering why his mother didn't just buy a new one and Shisui held it from the bottom, feeling so tired and worn out.

Itachi came in, a tree in his grasp, kicking a stand in front of him. He had two more to do after this. It annoyed him to do such mundane things when all he wanted to do was go and see Sakura, but he wasn't allowed and it was making him angrier and angrier while he thought about it. Why wasn't he allowed to see her? Why were they keeping him from her? He didn't understand and those questions were fueling his anger, making it harder to answer his family members without lashing out.

Sasuke didn't try to talk to him and Shisui was still stuck in his own little world, trying to keep himself from tearing himself apart from the inside out. He only held the ladder and stared blankly at the wall, berating himself. That's just how he felt. Guilt was eating him, but he kept his silence in favor of keeping Itachi's anger off him. If he told him that he knew, that he could do something about it, Itachi would blow up and blame him just as much as he was blaming himself. He knew this, understood it, and knew he had to live with the guilt and the anger at himself.

Sasuke got down from the ladder and watched Itachi walk out the door. He knew Shisui was battling something within his own mind and had been right in assuming he wouldn't be of much help in this matter. He'd known and saw it. "I'm going to go talk to Itachi," he said, laying his hand on Shisui's shoulder for a moment. Shisui only nodded. He watched Sasuke walk out the door after his brother and collapsed on the couch, staring at the ceiling. There wasn't anything he could do right now, not with the way his brain was attacking itself.

Sasuke stood behind Itachi, leaning on a car in the garage while he watched him. There was a long few minutes of silence, waiting for him to talk before saying something. Sasuke knew Itachi needed to ask, just needed to calm down slightly before he could. Finally, after ten minutes or so, Itachi finally spoke.

"What happened?" he was straining to keep his voice calm and Sasuke could hear it. Sasuke looked at his hands, but Itachi wasn't going to look at him either. He was far too upset to do so.

"She tried to kill herself. He cut her wrists and lost a lot of blood and hit her head when she passed out. Her father found her and brought her in," he explained, slowly. He wanted the words to be able to soak into Itachi's head so he wouldn't have to ask again. Itachi snipped a branch a little too hard and he was silent for a minute.

"Why did she try to kill herself?" he asked, a slight bit of anger filtering into his voice. He had lost his cool, his calm. He was far too upset and Sasuke knew this. He couldn't do anything to calm him down right now, though. When Itachi thought he was justified in his anger, there was nothing he could do to calm him down. There wasn't anything anybody could really do.

"We read the chart. She had a lot of injuries. She had a couple fractured ribs, a broken ankle, a sprained wrist and her collarbone was fractured too. Her face was black and blue a few days ago, but it's getting better and she had deep lacerations all over her body, especially over her stomach and lower back. Some of them were new and some weren't. There was also evidence of her being raped." Sasuke just listed off all the things he knew, letting Itachi draw his own conclusions.

"Why didn't she tell us?" Itachi asked no one in particular. His voice was quiet, strained. He was hurting and didn't want anyone to know. He really wanted everyone to think he was a stoic ice cube that didn't feel anything, especially pain like this. Sasuke still didn't reach out to his brother. He wasn't a touchy person and wouldn't take it from him although he knew Sasuke was just trying to make him feel better.

"It's Sakura. Perhaps she didn't think it was important enough to tell us," Sasuke shrugged. "You heard what she said all the time. Her father needed her. She believed, wholeheartedly, that he needed her and couldn't live without her. With what happened, perhaps she couldn't leave because he had beaten her into thinking she couldn't."

"It's a form of Stockholm syndrome," Sasuke turned at the voice. Shisui was walking towards them, hands in his sweatshirt and looking at the floor. Itachi turned to look at his cousin in his surprise as well. They were silent, waiting for Shisui to continue talking. "She believes he loves her and wants the best for her. He got her into college, although her church doesn't allow it. He's done things here and there that made her think he loved her. He made her think he needed her because he would never cook and clean on his own. It was a big, twisted lie to control her."

"Is that why she always went back?" Sasuke asked, interested now. He had never heard of such a thing, but Shisui would know. He had lived through it. He knew things that they could only guess at, including things about Sakura.

"Yes," Shisui said, leaning beside Sasuke on the car. "Because she thought he needed her and did those things for her, she should always go back and show him that she loved him too. That's just how it works with abusers and their victims. I'm not letting her go back after she wakes up though," Shisui's eyes turned dark and he glared at the floor. No, he wouldn't let her go back. The next time she ended up in the hospital could be the last and he couldn't quite deal with it. He had already failed once for her, he wouldn't fail again.

"I agree," Itachi said just as darkly. He would help Shisui to keep her away from that terrible man and make sure he never came near her again. "I just want to see her," he said, breaking in front of his brother and cousin. They watched him, knowing this hardly ever happened. He never showed much emotion, but hearing he wanted to see her was something he would rarely ever say.

"Soon, cousin. If she gets worse or if she wakes up, we'll let you see her then," Shisui said. He knew. Itachi had not left his bed when he ended up in the hospital. It had been a week and a half with him beside his bed, watching him and wishing for him to just wake up. He had pictures and Mikoto would never let him forget it. He and Itachi were so close just because of that.

"I don't want to see her in a casket," he said, going back to the tree. He didn't. He didn't think he could live through it if he were to see her in a casket. He had had her in his arms and held her all night just a couple weeks ago and she smiled and laughed with him. He couldn't see her in a casket when he cared so much for her, he didn't think his mind could take it.

"I know, cousin," Shisui brought him in for a hug and he allowed it. Shisui knew his cousin had more feelings for the girl than he let on. He saw it and understood it. He was controlling himself, though, and for that Shisui was glad and proud. Itachi had great control over his emotions, but he was still allowing himself to feel it and that was the most important part. He released his cousin.

"Guys! Guys, I found you!" Naruto was running down the garage to them, out of the breath. He had clearly run through the whole house looking for them and he held his phone up like a beacon. Sasuke glared at him and Shisui and Itachi just looked at him, wondering what he was doing. He was out of breath by the time he reached them and he bent over, catching his breath before continuing. "Sakura's been taken off the ventilator, guys!"

Itachi's world froze for a moment. She was on a ventilator? She was so bad that she needed things to help her breathe? He hadn't known that and his world came crashing down. How had he not seen that she'd been beaten and hurt all the time? How had he allowed it to get this far? Now he was berating himself just like Shisui was. Shisui narrowed his eyes at him, knowing that he was beating himself up.

"That's great, Naruto," Shisui was the first one to talk. Someone had to and Sasuke didn't seem to want to say anything and, from the look in his eyes, Itachi wasn't in a place to answer either. Naruto was exuberant and excited about the fact Sakura had been taken off the ventilator, but no one else felt the happiness. She wasn't awake yet. Until she woke, there would be little happiness.

"Yeah," Naruto looked down at his phone and didn't say anything else. He didn't have anything to really say anything else. No one did. It was quiet in the garage now and no one knew what to say. Sasuke sighed.

"Come on, Shisui, we have to go and finish the decorating inside. We'll help you with the trees later, Itachi," Sasuke said, pulling his cousin by the arm. Itachi only nodded, but he didn't seem like he really heard his brother. He was too deep in thought and didn't really have anything to say.

"Itachi." He had forgotten Naruto was behind him. He didn't turn around to say anything, merely grunted to let him know he was listening. "I'm sorry," was all he could say. There was nothing else to say. He knew Itachi cared about Sakura immensely, just like he and Sasuke did. He knew they shouldn't have kept this from him and had felt quite terrible about it, but didn't want to anger Sasuke and Mikoto by attempting to tell him on his own.

"Everyone's just trying to deal with this in their own way," Itachi said quietly. He didn't really have anything else to say but the truth. Naruto could only nod along with his words. He left then, with nothing else to say. That was the first time Itachi didn't just shrug him off and he kind of felt good about it, but didn't feel any happiness from it. Perhaps he could actually like Itachi after this.

That night, after Itachi got into bed, he let his mind wander. He wondered if Sakura would ever wake up, if she'd been out for the better part of a week. Those days could turn into weeks and Sakura could be asleep forever, never to wake up. Apparently, her brain still had a lot of activity if she was breathing on her own, but Itachi couldn't help but feel drained. He blamed himself, for he missed all the small things she said and did that he should have noticed. He blamed himself, much as Shisui did, because he knew he should have done something, anything to keep this from happening. He berated himself for hours, staring at the ceiling and bringing up more and more anger. He couldn't help it, there was just so much regret. He didn't get much sleep that night.

* * *

She was going insane in her own mind. She had retreated to the darkest corner she could find and tried to block the nightmares from getting the best of her. The singing was long gone by now and, just as she had guessed, the memories had come back to haunt her almost immediately after. There were cracks in her foundation, and they always got to her after a while. The memories hunted her down and forced her to remember every last single detail of her horrid life.

The day he'd come back from prison, she had spent all day cleaning and making sure everything was perfect before he was set to come home. She waited patiently at the bottom of the stairs when he came in. He demanded a meal, bashing the prison food all the while. Of course, like a good little daughter, she made it for him and sat silently while he ate.

"This isn't much better than that prison slop!" he 'd yelled, throwing it in her face. He stood from the table and grabbed her by the hair, throwing her to the ground. He kicked her in the stomach, over and over, until she vomited on the floor, unable to keep it down.

"You're so disgusting," he had said, picking her head up by her hair again and pushing her face into the vomit. "How do you live with yourself?" he kicked her again, once, twice, and she though he would leave her alone after that. He grabbed a fistful of her hair again and lifted her so he could whisper in her ear. "You're a useless girl. I wish you were dead," he threw her head back down and stomped away, up the stairs and slamming the door to his room.

She hadn't cried, she didn't allow herself to cry. She lifted herself slowly from the floor, feeling tender, and cleaned everything up before walking slowly up the stairs and cleaning herself off in the shower. She had been so sore the following day and her muscles screamed every time she moved but, in fear of another beating, did everything she was supposed to anyways.

The memory swirled away and another came up just as it left. This is what happened here in this dark place. Just as one memory left, another filled it's place. It always did. Sakura held no hope in finding a way out and resigned herself to the memory.

She was in the bathtub as a little girl, right after her mother had left, and her father was giving her a bath. He wasn't gentle, at all, and kept getting soap in her eyes. She squirmed and moved around, trying to dodge his hands. She certainly didn't make it easy for him.

He became angrier and angrier, which made his movements rougher, and she squirmed more the more frustrated he became. He pushed her harshly and she hit her head on the edge of the tub, falling down into the water. She tried to get up, she really did, but her father's hand was on top of her head, holding her down. She held her breath as long as she could, but couldn't anymore. She struggled, trying her hardest to reach the air, but couldn't. Just as she was about to pass out, he let her up. She coughed and spluttered, tears springing to her eyes.

"Be nice, or I won't let you up next time," he'd said gruffly. She didn't move at all until he told her to get out of the bathtub and threw a towel over her, telling her to clean up the water she'd gotten everywhere. She did as she was told and didn't cry until she got into bed that night, her lungs and throat still hurting from the unwanted water that had invaded them.

The memory flew away and she folded in on herself, squeezing her eyes tighter. She wanted to shout at the nightmares to go away, leave her alone, stop making her relive every terrible day that befell her, but she couldn't find her voice. Another entered her mind.

Her pastor had come over to give them great news. She was standing at the bottom of the stairs, staring at the floor, when her pastor told her father that she had been chosen to be a 'golden maid.' She knew the implications of this. It was right after her father had talked him into allowing her to go to college and now there was this.

A golden maid, in her church, was a girl that had surpassed all of the other girls in her age group. She was smarter or more beautiful, something of the like. It meant most boys from the church couldn't just ask for her hand, they had to court her. She would have to go through special classes to know what to expect and how to make her husband happy. She would be married off to an older, very prominent member of her church when she finished her schooling.

She hated those classes, held in the church basement with her pastor and her father. She blocked out the memories and so they appeared fuzzy, but she could still remember every little thing they did to her and how she hurt afterwards. She had never said anything to her friends, though. "This is a great honor and you should be happy," her father said. She had only nodded and dealt with the pain.

The singing had not come back and so she was subjected to her memories, over and over. They beat at her, not letting her attention waver. She had to pay attention; she had to relive all those terrible days and horrible nights. There was no way around it. She cried and cried, but no one came to wake her up. She was lost in the dark peril of her own mind, her own memories, and was being slowly tortured into insanity. All she wanted was to wake up. "Please," she begged soundlessly, "Please, just let me wake up."

* * *

Mikoto was getting ready for her party, but was thinking while she cooked. The boys didn't seem like they were in a party mood and she didn't want to make them be there when they weren't going to enjoy themselves. She was going to have another party tomorrow and for New Year's anyways, so why make them be here if they didn't want to be? Itachi was sitting at the island, soundlessly watching her. She placed a plate in front of him, but he only picked at it.

She made up her mind and bustled up the stairs, hoping it seemed as though she was going to get something from the hall closet at the top of the stairs. Instead, she went straight to Sasuke's room and found who she looking for. Sasuke and Naruto were talking in hushed voices, but stopped when she knocked on the door.

"What were you talking about?" she asked, feigning a smile. Sasuke and Naruto shrugged.

"Just talking," he answered quietly. They'd been talking about Sakura again, Mikoto knew it. It made her slightly happy because that's what she'd come up here to talk about. She shooed Naruto out of Sasuke's desk chair and he sat beside Sasuke, watching her. Sasuke's eyes were suspicious, but Naruto didn't seem to know anything was up.

"I want you to take Itachi to see her," Mikoto said softly, looking at the floor. "I don't expect any of you to be here tonight, not with this going on, and I wouldn't want Itachi to finally explode around our family members. No one will miss you," she finished, looking hopefully at Sasuke. Sasuke only nodded.

"That's what we were talking about," he said simply. "We were debating who should take him and we decided it should be Shisui and I." Naruto wasn't the best person to go with Itachi and someone needed to go with him or he wouldn't be back for days.

"Right, call Shisui then," Mikoto stood and left the room to let them finish talking. Itachi didn't notice when she walked into the kitchen. He hadn't missed her much. It hurt her to know that her boys were hurting, but she was in pain. Even her husband was feeling the tense atmosphere that followed their sons and Naruto around. He didn't show it outright, but his face was a little tenser, the line of his lips a little tighter. He was spearheading Sakura's case, but they needed her to wake up. His stress rose every day that she didn't.

It was a long while before Sasuke came down the stairs. He threw a coat over Itachi. "Come on, brother," he said quietly, heading for the garage. Itachi looked after him, eyes unreadable.

"What?" he asked no one in particular, but Mikoto was still in the room.

"Go see Sakura, Itachi. You don't have to be here tonight," she repeated what she'd said to the other two boys. She smiled sadly and the beginnings of tears were evident in her eyes. Itachi, eyes widening a slight fraction, rose quickly and walked to the door. He was gone in a moment and Mikoto allowed the few tears in her eyes to fall. No doubt Itachi would be much worse when he came back.

"Hey there, little cousin," Shisui was leaning against Sasuke's car and gave Itachi a wide smile. Yes, he was still upset about Sakura, but knew better than to show it right now. His smile fell quickly, though, when he saw the look in Itachi's eyes. Itachi's mood couldn't be lightened. He knew it and had rushed over here when Sasuke had called him. He had to be here for this.

"Why are you here?" Itachi's voice wasn't unkind, just hard. He was steeling himself against the world, hiding behind walls made of concrete and steel. He was shutting himself off from the world so he wouldn't seem like he was hurting, though they all knew he was. No matter what extreme lengths he went to, they all knew he wasn't acting himself.

"I'm going with my cousins to the hospital, of course," Shisui said without his smile this time. Itachi had the slightest trace of gratitude in his eyes as he nodded, finally moving to the car. Shisui slid in the back seat and stretched out for the ride. It took about half an hour and he wasn't about to be uncomfortable that entire time.

The air was tense and quiet while they were on the way to the hospital. Shisui didn't want to try and lighten the mood, knowing it would probably cause Itachi to become tenser and Sasuke to retract in on himself, too. His black eyes that so mirrored his cousins' watched the scenery fly by as they made their way into the city.

The walk up to her room was silent as well and Sasuke stopped in the waiting room. Itachi stopped too and looked to his brother. He wanted him with him, but Sasuke held up a hand. "Aren't you coming?" he still asked. Sasuke shook his head. His brother didn't need him right now, he needed Shisui. Shisui, who better understood the feelings his brother had and could help him much better than he. Shisui only pressed a hand to Itachi's shoulder and pushed him gently across the floor, towards Sakura's room.

They stood on the threshold of her room for a few long minutes. Itachi couldn't make himself move into the room and Shisui was trying to give him strength, his hand still on his shoulder. "Come on, little cousin," he gave him a shaky reassuring smile and nudged him gently into the room. He led him to her bed, hoping he would do something, anything. Of course he didn't. He could only stare at her, watching her too pale face and her too small body in the bed.

"I can't," Itachi's voice was quiet, it was almost a murmur. He didn't want to look at her for too long; a gut wrenching feeling was growing in his body, but he couldn't look away. This made everything so real. She wasn't ignoring him or avoiding him. She was laying in a hospital bed, holding on to a thread of life, and in serious danger of losing her grip.

"You can," Shisui said, just as softly, "You did it for me. Remember what the nurse said all those years ago?" He was answered with a shrug and a noncommittal grunt. "You and I both know her mind is giving up and she doesn't want to wake up. Remember when that happened to me and the nurse said to talk to me? You never know if the person can hear you, but it's worth a try."

Itachi didn't do anything. He stood there, staring at him, and didn't even give any indication that he'd heard his cousin. Shisui sighed.

"Touch her, cousin," he took his hand and guided him out to touch her. Itachi had a look of fear hidden within his eyes, but he touched her after a couple long minutes. He fell in a chair that Shisui brought up and stared at her face. His hand was over hers, squeezing as tightly as Shisui did when he held it. He was begging her to wake up, he knew. He had pictures to prove Itachi did the same for him in the hospital. "Talk, say her name, say something."

"I can't."

"Sure you can, you did for me little cousin," Shisui ruffled his hair affectionately and quietly left the room. He would return eventually, but Itachi needed to be left alone for this. The man was extremely self conscious and didn't want to talk to her when he was in the room. It was embarrassing and it felt weird, Shisui could attest to that. He often sang to her when he was alone with her and it had been awkward the first few times he'd tried.

Itachi sat by her bedside for a long while just staring at her face. She looked thin. She looked tired. She looked like, although she had been stuck in a coma for days, she hadn't slept. He wondered what horrors were going on in her mind to keep her from waking. He didn't want to talk to her, he felt silly. He suddenly thought of that day all those years ago, the one that Shisui had been alluding to. The nurse _had_ told him to talk to him, that maybe Shisui would hear him and come back. Itachi had believed her then, being a stupid little child, and had thought it worked when Shisui had woken up and smiled at him.

"Sakura," his voice sounded far braver than he felt. He felt dumb, he really did, but he did it out of the hope it would work. "Don't give up, not yet Sakura," he kept saying her name, feeling tears in his eyes. He had never been one to cry, more the one to hide his emotions behind a wall and pretend everything was fine. "Please, Sakura," was the last thing he said before he stood, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. He held her hand as he had stood and he stared at her face, thinking that this could be the last time he would see her when she had a pulse. He didn't want to think that, he really didn't, but couldn't help it. It was all he'd been thinking this entire time.

Shisui and Sasuke were standing at the doorway a few minutes later, watching. Itachi seemed like he was saying goodbye. He looked and sounded like he would never see her again, but they knew it could happen. They knew she could never wake up and would be put into the ground. Sasuke wanted to reach out and touch Itachi's shoulder, but held himself back. He didn't want to interrupt the quiet moment Itachi was having. He was just trying to say his goodbyes so it wouldn't hurt as much later, he could respect that.

Itachi looked up at them in the next moment, looking quite surprised. He couldn't talk for a few minutes and Shisui took it upon himself to ask, "What, Itachi?" he had moved slightly into the room, waiting for the younger man to break down.

"She moved." Sasuke was in the room now, on the other side of the bed, looking down at her and Shisui was beside him, watching him.

"What?" How?" he couldn't quite make his head comprehend the entire thing. Sakura had moved? This was news that corrupted his thinking process and made it difficult to wrap his head around. He had a few moments to work through it before Itachi spoke again.

"Her hand, her fingers, they…moved," was all he could get out. It was a struggle for him to find the words to say. Shisui wanted to be sarcastic and congratulate him for his eloquence on the matter, but kept his mouth shut. He and Sasuke watched the small girl for a few long minutes before they saw her hand move again. Sasuke ran to the nurses' station.

* * *

The last memory she was subjected to before falling into complete darkness was the worst one.

She had come home from school. Her father's car was there and she idly wondered why. She went through her routine before padding up the stairs to finish her homework. She thought nothing amiss until her father came to her room, obviously drunk. He held a bottle of whiskey in his hands and his unfocused eyes settled on her. She shrank back in her seat and regarded him with fear.

"It's time to take what I want," he'd said gruffly, shoving his way into the room and grabbing her hair. He pulled her from her chair and threw her to the ground, she felt her ankle twist at an odd angle and she tried to break her fall with her hands, her right wrist hurting after she fell. She wanted to scream, wanted to, but he had her throat in his hand, choking her. Nothing but the smallest amount of breath escaped her. He began tearing at her clothes, turning them into scraps that he threw around the room. Tears invaded her eyes as he did so.

He didn't try to prepare, didn't care really as she thought. He held her arms down so she couldn't try and get away and shoved into her, hand over her mouth so her shriek of pain was muffled. He rutted into her, again and again, her tears and his grunting the only sound in the room. She wanted it to be over. She wished it would be. He was gripping her so hard, she knew she would have bruises she'd have to lie about and there was so much pain between her legs she knew she'd have trouble walking.

When he finally finished, he kicked her a few times harshly in the ribs, feeling the bones crack and left without caring what he'd done. He hit the bottle of whiskey on the way out and it fell to the floor, breaking into a hundred pieces. He didn't seem to care and just left, knowing she would clean it.

Sakura couldn't move. Her tears leaked into the carpet and she laid there for hours, feeling the shame of unwanted violation. She cried and cried until she had nothing left. Bitterness moved through her and despair followed soon behind. She felt like she was in so much pain and she couldn't stand it any longer. The bitterness and despair swallowed her up and she decided it was time to end it.

She pulled herself up, injuries screaming at her while she moved. She ignored it and reached for a shard of bottle near her. Without thinking about it, she cut into her wrists again and again until her vision grew fuzzy and her mind grew dim. She fell to the floor, barely feeling her head hit the corner of the desk on the way down, entering the darkness and leaving herself vulnerable to the nightmares.

The last memory swirled away and she was finally left alone. She felt herself falling. Falling and falling beneath waves of bitterness and sadness, rage and resentment. She couldn't pull herself out of the rising waves she'd wound up to and she found that she didn't really want to try. She didn't want to fight. She had given up her fight when she had gone for the shard of bottle. She was done.

But then she heard a voice. A voice sunk beneath the waves and reached her. It wasn't the voice that had sung to her, but she knew that voice and, right now, it sounded like hers. It sounded like it was breaking, like the owner was going through so much pain and suffering.

 _Sakura_.

Her eyes shot open in her dark world. She searched for where the voice came from, the voice that promised warmth and comfort, safety and happiness. She heard the voice and it gave her something she had gone so long without. She had been lost and alone, afraid, but someone had found her. She knew the voice belonged to _him_ and she couldn't give up on him.

 _Don't give up._

 _Not yet._

 _Please, Sakura._

She could hear her name on his tongue and the emotions that mirrored hers. She found the direction of the voice and reached towards it. She fought through the waves of her bitterness and despair. Her rage and resentment were fueling her, helping her get out of the darkness.

Memories began swirling around her, but they weren't the ones that tortured her. She saw the first time she'd met Sasuke and Naruto. She remembered the feeling of happiness when she had finally allowed Naruto hug her. She remembered how nice it felt to spend the night at the Uchiha house, away from all her pain and stress. She felt the warmth of Mikoto's welcoming hug and her smile. She remembered Itachi holding her all night, whispering words he didn't quite know in her ear. She felt his calm, warm embrace and the happiness she always felt when he gave her his attention. She remembered Shisui's smile and the way he comforted her though he hardly knew her. She remembered all the nice memories that had been pushed to the side in the darkness of her mind. It gave her hope and she was filled with the warmth she'd gone so long without.

Her fight stopped when she reached the field of warm memories. She fell among them, their light filling her with the happiness, hope, and warmth she hadn't had in the darkness. She could see the waking world; it was just beyond this field. It would only take a few steps, but she was so tired. She could lie in her world of light and happiness for a few moments before returning to the waking world, surely.

And so she stayed, letting her happy memories swirl around her and block out the dark memories that haunted her for so long. She needed to let them for a moment; she didn't want this to end. She knew it had to, though, and when she was ready, she pulled herself up. She felt light as a feather and had no problems taking the short few steps to the world that waited for her.

* * *

 **My shoulder hurts bro. I've written so many words in the past two days.**

 **I'm still not removing them. I like to read them when I need a giggle.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Okay, you should read this.**

 **Shhh. I know. I know it's gonna sound like it's turning into a Shisui and Sakura story.**

 **Shhhh, it's not.**

 **Believe in me as a hopeless romantic. If I 'splained errthang it wouldn't be fun to write.**

 **Things need drama, my angel faces. That's all I'm setting up for.**

 **So shhhh, it'll all turn out okay. Okay?**

* * *

"Hey there, cream puff," Shisui was walking into her room, a smile lighting up his face when he saw one on hers. She wasn't speaking much, not to anyone, and hadn't said a word since she woke. He would guess that she didn't want to talk about what happened and therefore wouldn't talk at all, but that was just his guess without being able to really ask. "How are you doing today?"

She shrugged and patted a space on the bed, inviting him to sit. He brushed his hand along hers and sat, wondering why she was still so cold. She was always cold recently, as he'd seen. Her ribs were getting better and her collarbone was soon behind. The sprains had long since healed, but she was still here. They couldn't discharge her without a psych evaluation and she wouldn't speak, so they couldn't give her one.

"Don't you want to get out of here?" he asked. He'd been trying to get her to speak for weeks and Itachi had been trying to as well, but he hadn't had much luck either. Sakura shrugged again. She looked at the bed covers and seemed to be thinking. She just couldn't. She didn't want to. She knew everyone else wanted her to and she thought perhaps that put her off a little more. It bothered her slightly. Couldn't she just be left alone for a little while? "Hey, you're not allowed to do that."

She shot him a look that clearly asked him 'do what?' He laughed.

"You're not allowed to fold in on yourself, cream puff. If you fold in on yourself, you won't ever get better." He put his hand gently over hers. "Don't worry, how about I get you a computer and you can type all your answers out instead of staying here?" Sakura only shrugged. She hadn't really agreed to any other type of communication. She didn't want to communicate. She wanted to hide in her hospital room and never come out. "Come on, cream puff, you can't stay here forever. Itachi wants you to come home."

Shisui was getting frustrated that she wouldn't talk. He wanted her to. He didn't like having a one sided conversation and it was getting more and more annoying to try and get her to talk. He'd been trying just about every day to get her to talk and his patience was wearing thin. He had an uncanny amount of patience, given his major, but she wasn't giving him anything.

"Here," he pulled out his laptop and turned it on, opening a text document. He set it in her lap and sat beside her, watching her. She didn't do anything for a few long moments, merely staring at the screen. "Come on," he said gently, placing her hand on the keyboard. She stared at the keys for a long minute, as if she didn't quite remember how to use it. He waited and waited, hoping she would do something. Finally, she pressed two letters. A simple 'hi.' He couldn't help the swell of relief inside him.

"Do you want to go home?" he asked, hoping she would give him an honest answer. She looked at him and tilted her head. "Just answer the question, cream puff," he sighed. She closed her eyes briefly before typing quickly and turning the laptop to him.

'No. I don't like my home.' Shisui didn't know what to do now. She didn't want to go home? Perhaps that's why she didn't want to leave the hospital. She was typing again and he leaned over her shoulder to read as she typed. 'My father is there. I don't want to go home.'

"Why don't you ask Mikoto if she'd give you a room in her house? You know she would. I know she would. She did that for me after I got out of the hospital," he said gently. Sakura shook her head, typing again. He viewed this as a breakthrough. He hadn't thought this would get this far, but he was glad she was actually trying to communicate with him now.

'That's asking too much.' There was another reason, but she didn't want to tell him that. She didn't want to live in the same house as Itachi. She felt like she had let him down and didn't want to see the disappointment in his eyes. She had either feigned sleep or stared at a wall when he came to visit and she felt bad about that, too, but she just couldn't face him. Not now and probably not ever.

"Then would you want to come and stay with me?" Shisui was giving a last ditch effort here. Her insurance wasn't going to pay for many more days in the hospital and she didn't even seem to want to be around his other family members. She had been giving Itachi the cold shoulder and Naruto and Sasuke couldn't even get anywhere with her, which was saying something. He thought those two could get anywhere and everywhere with her. He didn't want to just forget about her and everyone else was worried; she seemed to be the only one that didn't want to do anything. Maybe she hadn't wanted to wake up?

'I couldn't ask that of you, either.' Her fingers were pretty much flying across the keyboard at this point and he was slightly entranced by it. He sighed after reading what she wrote.

"I offered. You won't let anyone else be there for you, so let me annoy the crap out of you until you feel better, cream puff," he smiled at her. Sakura only stared at the computer screen. "Look, I know what you're going to say. You don't have a job or clothes or anything that you could put into your room. It's fine. I'll ask Mikoto and Naruto's girlfriend for some old clothes and my place has an extra bed already. My work stuff is in there, but that's pretty easily moved to the living room. I'd rather have you with me than let you wander the streets," Shisui felt slightly out of breath after he'd said all he needed to. He just wanted Sakura out of here and had come on the request of Itachi. Itachi hadn't made any headway with her and so had turned to him.

Sakura only gave a short nod in response to him. She didn't have to type her answer.

"All right," he stood and pulled his bag up to his shoulder. "I'm going to get you discharged, then." Sakura looked slightly fearful. She had felt safe here and wasn't exactly ready to go. "Don't worry, cream puff, I'm not going to leave you alone," he pressed his hand to her shoulder briefly. "There's someone else that has to do your psych eval, but they'll release you to me when I show them the meager credentials I do have," he grinned and she didn't look at him, opting for the window instead.

He was back an hour later, pulling sweatpants and a tank top out of his bag. He hadn't wanted to bring anything that would be too difficult for her to put on. He closed the door and laid the clothes at the end of her bed.

"Come on, time to change." She could only nod as she slowly shifted herself out of the bed, carefully laying his laptop off to the side. He watched her try to pull the sweatpants on, but she flinched and a soft cry flew from her lips. She felt pain in her ribs and she dropped the clothing to wrap her arms around her stomach. Shisui sighed. She wasn't feeling too well still. He picked the sweatpants up and helped her into them. He felt slightly foolish, but didn't really mind all that much.

She turned around to put the tank top on and he watched her in mild curiosity. He had never seen someone with a broken collarbone attempt to put on a shirt and couldn't help but be interested. She got it over head first and left the straps hanging. He was glad he brought something that could stretch, because she pushed it down to her waist before pulling the straps over her shoulders. He helped her into the heavy jacket he'd brought for her and she put the shoes on easily. He'd thought to bring something she could just slip on. She sat tiredly back on the bed.

"I'll be back with a nurse and the paperwork," Shisui said, "There are just a few things you have to sign." She nodded, staring at the floor. He left the room and went back to the nurses' station, finding her nurse rather easily. The woman seemed rather happy that Sakura was going home and produced the paperwork for her quickly.

"I'm so happy you're going home, Sakura," the nurse said when he followed her into the room. "It must be exciting for you." Sakura only shrugged, refusing to look at the woman. She didn't like her. She had made her eat when she didn't feel like it and had made her bathe when she had been hurting too much to move. The nurse only smiled and put the clipboard in her lap.

"Sign here, here, and here," she pointed and Sakura signed off on each line. The nurse produced a couple orange bottles from her person and handed them to Shisui. "These are powerful painkillers for her," she smiled, "If she's hurting, give them to her." Shisui only nodded and tucked the bottles and his laptop into his bag. "Alright," she took the clipboard back from Sakura, "I'll go and get your wheelchair."

Sakura sat silently, staring at her hands. She was surprised when Shisui touched her again and she looked up at him, confused. He smiled at her and leaned down, pressing a kiss to her head. "Don't worry, you'll be okay," he said gently, stepping away from her just as the door opened. Sakura didn't react much.

"Alright, come on, in the wheelchair," the nurse was at her side, helping her up though she didn't really need it. She put her into the chair and began pushing her down the hallway, Shisui following closely. It was a long walk to the front entrance and Shisui left to get his car. He came back to see Sakura was still sitting there staring at the ground while the nurse talked animatedly.

He pulled himself out of the car and opened the passenger side door, offering his arm to Sakura. She ignored it and pushed herself up, seating herself carefully in the car. She didn't say a word to the nurse and Shisui only smiled helplessly at her while she did the same, turning back to the hospital. He had a feeling the nurse wouldn't miss Sakura very much.

"Ready?" he asked, not expecting an answer. She only stared out of the window. He sighed and started the car, trying to remember how to get out of this massive parking lot.

Sakura kept her silence on the ride to his apartment, which wasn't far from the hospital. She kept her mouth shut while he opened her door and offered her his hand, which she took this time. She was silent as they made their way slowly up the stairs and he sat her on the couch, turning on the television for her.

"I'm going to go see Mikoto, alright?" he asked. She didn't really respond, he didn't expect her to, and so he just turned around. He had to stop when her small hand grasped his sleeve and pulled. It wasn't a harsh pull and it was obvious she didn't have a lot of strength, but he still turned back to her. She blinked and just shook her head. She wanted to tell him no, don't leave her alone right now. Please stay. She was afraid to be alone, but she couldn't make her tongue work.

"What's up, cream puff?" he tried. He could see that she was struggling, but he didn't know what was wrong. Gently, he pulled her hand off his sleeve. "I'm just getting a pen and paper," he said, going to the other room. He'd have to move his desk out at some point tonight and he was glad it wasn't too heavy. He found some paper and a pen that worked before returning to her and placing it on her lap.

'I don't want to be alone,' her scribble read. She looked up at him, wishing he would stay. He only sat beside her and pulled out his phone.

"Fine, then," he said easily. He texted Mikoto instead. "You know, you haven't given me a hug yet," he was trying to lighten the mood. Sakura didn't really react, but she did move close to him and press her face into his shoulder. He just wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tightly; trying to make sure he didn't anger her injuries. He let her go, but she didn't pull away.

She hadn't really received a hug for a long while and she'd forgotten how nice it felt. He was so warm and his arms wrapped tightly around her made her feel slightly better. She had forgotten how nice it felt and didn't want to leave his embrace. He was still for a moment before resting a hand lightly in the middle of her back. He had obviously given in to her.

"Does it feel like a dream?" he asked pensively, staring at the ceiling. Sakura reached for the paper that had fallen on the floor and scribbled a 'what?' before showing him. He shrugged. "I don't know. When I woke up in the hospital and finally got to go home, it didn't feel real. It felt like a dream. I didn't have to deal with my father anymore and there were people around me that cared. It was weird." He brushed his fingers through her hair. Two people caught in the same situation, though his was far behind him. He felt a certain sense of camaraderie with her, one that connected him strongly. He wanted to let her know it was okay to feel what she was feeling because he understood it. He didn't want her to be alone in this, like he'd had to be.

'It hurts too much to be a dream,' was her scribbled answer. She didn't know what he wanted from her, couldn't really tell. She could feel his eyes on her, watching her closely, and she couldn't really figure out why. She pressed her face into his shoulder and closed her eyes. He tightened his arm around her in a slight hug.

"Sorry, cream puff, I just know it's hard." He couldn't stop calling her that, he found. She hadn't said anything against it. She, meanwhile, didn't really know what to say or how to feel. He was pretty similar to Itachi in the physical sense, but he had all the right words to say when his cousin didn't. She didn't feel nearly as warm and comforted in his hold as she did with Itachi, but it was nice enough that she found she didn't want to move.

She laid there with him for a long while, thoughts blundering through her head. She stared, unseeing, at the program and the thoughts were starting to anger her. How could he smile? How could he go through life, happy and carefree? She didn't know. She couldn't see the end of her anger and sadness at this point and it was threatening to swallow her whole and drag her back down to that place she didn't want to be.

"How are you so happy?" she found herself blurting out. Funny, when she didn't think about it, her mouth blurted what she wanted to say. It was odd and she surprised herself with her voice. Shisui seemed rather surprised too. He had stiffened and looked down at her in speechlessness for a long moment. His speechlessness was making her more frustrated though, and she pulled away from him. "How do you forget everything?" she was on a rampage now, her frustration letting her voice work for once. She twisted and showed her back to him. "How do you forget when you have _this_ all over you, reminding you every moment of your life? And this," she turned and showed him her wrists. "How do you forget that you did _this_ to yourself in an attempt to escape?" She was hurting far more than he thought.

He grabbed her good shoulder and pulled her towards his chest. He hugged her tightly, nose in her hair. Her good arm slowly lifted to wrap around his middle and he heard soft whimpers when she started to cry. How did he get himself into these situations? If Itachi were to walk in he'd be a dead man.

"Shh, cream puff," he cooed gently, running his hand down her back. "I never forgot, you know. It hurts every day. I see the scars that were left behind and it makes me so, so angry. I see my futile attempt at suicide every day and it throws me into that hole I was stuck in for a long time. It rustles up old feelings of bitterness and despair. It's so very hard, but if I can do it, so can you." He gently brushed her hair out of her face so it didn't stick to her tears.

She whimpered, her motivation for speech lost again. She wouldn't look him; her face was firmly planted in his chest. He only continued running his hand through her hair and down her back, over and over, hoping that he was quelling her tears. He decided to continue talking to try and ease her mind a little more.

"It'll be easier after a while, little Sakura. The memories will fade to the back of your mind and what's left in the spaces will be new and better memories. You just have to believe me and stick it out." His voice was gentle, filled with the knowledge of having been there. She was grateful for his soft actions and knowing words. She felt just a little more comfortable in his embrace and her feelings felt quite a bit more validated in her feelings. She slowly closed her eyes and found she couldn't really open them again.

Shisui was surprised when he realized her breathing had evened out. She must have tired herself out from the crying, but he was happy she was comfortable enough to sleep. He hugged her and took the chance to check his phone. Mikoto had long since been on the way and had told him Itachi wanted to come and was following her at this point because he hadn't answered. He found he only had a couple minutes before they showed up at the door and didn't want to be caught in this compromising position.

Slowly and carefully, he pulled himself out from under Sakura and pulled a blanket over her, trying to make sure her injuries weren't in an odd position. He didn't want her to be in pain. Hopefully he could keep Itachi from waking her up. He would be disappointed if she wouldn't talk to him again. He knew her outburst was just because she had been bursting to say it and her mouth had worked faster than her mind.

There was a soft knock on the door and Shisui rushed to open it. He cast a quick glance at Sakura, seeing that she hadn't stirred, and opened the door. Mikoto stood, smiling, and Itachi was stone faced, obviously in a bad mood. Shisui stepped to the side and let them in.

"What's up, family members?" he asked brightly, though softly in an attempt to keep Sakura asleep. Itachi glared at him and he was surprised his cousin would partake in such an open display of hostility. He wondered for a moment why he was so upset.

"I brought clothes for Sakura, like you asked, Shisui," Mikoto smiled and held up two large garbage bags. Shisui took them, a smile on his face.

"Thanks," he said. He left them for a moment to put the bags in Sakura's room. She could look through them later when she was awake. Hopefully she would like what Mikoto gave her, though Mikoto had a good eye for clothes so he didn't think she'd hate much of it.

"Where is she?" Itachi's words were out of his mouth the moment he came back to the kitchen. Shisui wanted to sigh. He would have to navigate this carefully and make sure he didn't say anything that would anger his cousin more. He would probably be so angry that she decided to come here instead of the mansion, but Shisui couldn't even tell him why she decided as such.

"On the couch, sleeping," Shisui said easily. He busied himself with a few glasses of water. Mikoto took hers gratefully and Itachi merely glared at the one meant for him. Shisui only sighed and put it back on the counter. "I don't understand the animosity, cousin. I don't know why she decided to come here. I really don't. She still isn't talking, either, so don't expect an answer from her." He decided to keep her outburst to himself. There was no way in hell Itachi would take that well.

"How did you get her to answer you, then?" he asked, eyes narrowing. Shisui shrugged.

"There was a lot of nodding and shrugging," Shisui lied easily. "Listen, cousin, at least she's here instead of her house or out in the streets, accept it. It is better. I can help her in ways you know you can't." They had pretty much forgotten that Mikoto was standing there, watching the entire conversation.

"I can be unhappy about it," Itachi said sharply. She should be with him. He loved her and thought she shared the same feelings. She hadn't even looked at him when he'd been in the same room as her and wanted to know why. He wanted to know why she was ignoring him and why she didn't want to be in his presence. He wanted to know, but couldn't ask her when she was being guarded and looked after by Shisui. He just wanted to talk to her, have her alone with him for a couple minutes, but that wasn't happening, neither in the hospital or here. It was certainly frustrating.

"You can be unhappy about it, but she'll come to you when she'd ready," Shisui shrugged. "She's hurting, both physically and mentally. She probably can't bear to face you for some reason or another. I don't know what that reason is. You just have to be patient." Itachi was a patient man, Shisui knew, but the man's patience would definitely be tested at this point.

"Itachi, let's go. It's almost time for dinner," Mikoto said, a stern command under her pleasant tone. Itachi narrowed his eyes and Shisui almost thought he was going to say no and stay, but he turned and walked silently out the door. "He'll be okay, Shisui, it'll just take a while. When Sakura starts to talk to him again, it'll get better," she tried to lighten her nephew's mood, but he didn't seem to care much for her words.

"I already know that, Mikoto. It's just going to be difficult as all hell," Shisui sighed, brushing a hand through his hair. "Oh well, she's here which is a step in the right direction. Once I can get her to break her silent tongue, she has to go for a psych evaluation. I can sit in on it, but it'll still be difficult."

"Don't forget she has to give a statement to the police and press charges. Fugaku isn't going to let her back out of that, either," Mikoto said, biting her lip. There was a lot ahead for the young woman and she didn't really want to be around to watch, but knew she would have to. Sakura needed some support and help.

"Well, I don't think she'll allow Itachi or the other two near her right now, so I'll be doing my best," Shisui sighed again. "I'll see you later," he turned back to the couch and the girl hidden underneath the heavy blanket. He heard Mikoto leave quietly, the door shut gently behind her. He crossed to the small woman and stared down at her for a long minute.

"Why didn't you come over and visit?" he asked gently, leaning down. Her green eyes watched him and she reached for the pen and paper again. So she had just burst out in frustration earlier. She handed the paper to him.

'I don't know what to do.' He nodded. She didn't know what to say or what to do, not right now. He needed to just focus on getting her to talk easily again and then he could delve deeper into her psyche. She was severely damaged by what happened to her and it would be a long road back to what was before. He hoped she would be better than before, at least. She reached for him and he smiled easily at her.

She moved over and pulled at his hand to join her. He did so, fitting his body easily into the space she'd made. He didn't think anything of this. It had all started with him asking for a hug, so he couldn't say no to her now. She needed comfort and didn't know much about it other than physical contact, so he didn't have an issue giving it to her. She had never tried to do anything so he couldn't think anything. He was just here to make her feel better and get her to talk about her experience. He knew he would be opening his old wounds at this point, but he didn't care.

* * *

He woke in the middle of the night to piercing shrieks. He had gone to bed not long ago and wasn't too happy with being woken up. Seriously, who was having loud ass sex at three am? He woke more when he heard more screaming and realized it was coming from his apartment, from his living room, where he had left Sakura on the couch to sleep.

"Jesus Christ," he muttered, throwing his blankets back and rushing to the living room. Sakura was simply thrashing on the couch and he didn't think that would be good for her injuries. Before waking her, he rushed to his bag to get the orange bottles and a bottle of water. He placed them on the coffee table before grasping her good shoulder and giving her a rough shake.

"Sakura, you're alright," Shisui said when her eyes slowly opened. She stared at him blearily, tears in her eyes. She tried to move to him, wrap her arms around him, but she stopped when pain coursed through her body and a soft cry left her. "Here," he helped her into a sitting position and sat next to her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. He reached for the bottles and water, handing them to her. She took one of each and he watched her swallow them down.

It took about half an hour, but she was calming down.

"Was it a nightmare?" he asked. Itachi had told him that she had them and he would guess she'd have them anyways after what had happened. She only nodded in answer to his question. "Was it about way before the hospital or what happened right before it?" Sakura held up two fingers to indicate the second choice. He nodded and pushed her head into his shoulder. He pressed the paper and pen into her lap. "What did they do in the hospital to keep you from angering your injuries?"

'Strapped me down,' she scribbled. 'They didn't know why I was having them since I wouldn't tell them.' She looked at him and he gave her a curious look. She knew he wanted to know why she had them and she sighed deeply. 'I've always had nightmares. The old ones don't bother me too much anymore, just this one. About what happened,' she didn't know how to say it without saying it, but she knew she got her point across.

"Well, I won't strap you down," he smiled at her. She didn't really react, just looked at the floor. She was remembering something and he didn't like that. She was just a bundle of nerves and fucked up memories right now and he didn't know how to make her feel better right at this moment. He kissed the top of her head and wrapped his arm tightly around her waist. She closed her eyes and there was a small smile on her face as she leaned into his side.

"I have to go to work in the morning, missy, I have to get back to sleep." It was now four in the morning and he would be slightly late, but he didn't mind. He pushed himself off the couch and was about to go back to his room when he felt her pressing the paper to his hand. He took it from her and read it.

'If you leave, I won't be able to sleep.'

"Then you have two choices," he smiled down at her. He would get so much shit for this if Itachi ever found out. "You can stay on the couch and watch television until you have another nightmare, or you can come to bed with me." Sakura flushed, but held her hand out to him. He helped her up and led her to his room. He helped her into the side of the bed he'd been sleeping on and climbed in on the other side. He would feel awkward if he were to hold her and so didn't really know what to do. This would be fine on the couch, but this felt quite a bit more intimate.

Sakura's hand was nudging his and he grasped it with his own. This was okay. This wouldn't cause unwanted feelings. Holding her hand while they slept was way less intimate than holding her, her body pressed to his. He could be okay with this. It was better than running to her every two hours or so when she woke screaming.

The next morning, she was awake first. When he woke, she was staring at him silently, a grateful look in her eye. He smiled at that look and rolled over, intending on getting up. "Here," he pulled a laptop out from underneath his bed. He had three of these of varying quality. He had one for work, one for home, and this one that hid underneath his bed for unknown reasons. He hadn't gotten rid of it, simple as that.

"There's no password, put one on if you want. I won't try and look," he smiled at her. She took it from him and nodded in thanks. "And here," he tossed a remote at her and pointed to the top of the dresser where a TV sat. "I hope this'll keep you entertained while I'm gone." She nodded, pulling herself into a sitting position. She looked so tiny in his huge bed; he couldn't help but think it was cute.

"I'll come say goodbye before I go," he smiled. He left the room, clothes in hand, and jumped in the shower. He was out not even five minutes later thinking that he should make something for breakfast. He didn't know the last time she'd eaten. He scrambled some eggs and toasted some bread, bringing it to her in his room. He didn't usually eat in his room, but he was making an exception.

"Here we go," he said pleasantly, placing her plate in her lap. She looked at it as though she didn't know what it was. He couldn't help laughing. "What's that look for?" she just shrugged. She slowly picked up her fork, digging in. He was surprised with the speed with which she ate. She was done before him and waited until he was done to give him her plate. "That hospital food wasn't very good was it?" he grinned. She only smiled and shook her head. He checked his phone. "Shit, I'm going to be late. I'll see you later," he was up in a second, his bag over his shoulder and plates in one hand. He grabbed Sakura's arm for a second and kissed the top of her head. "Bye, cream puff."

She only waved as he shut the door behind him.

* * *

She looked at herself in the mirror, passing a hand over her healing collarbone and ribs. They still hurt, but not much with the medication the hospital had given her. She glared at herself, staring at her lips. She opened her mouth, willing sound to come out, but she didn't know what to say. She felt silly. She didn't want to talk to herself.

She stood there for hours, just glaring and trying to force herself to talk. She had just blurted something out yesterday, why couldn't she blurt something out now? She didn't understand it and it was so frustrating. She wanted to talk to Shisui. Shisui was the only reason she wasn't in the hospital anymore and she at least owed him her voice. It was annoying and frustrating and made her so upset just staring at herself. What was wrong with her? She had never had this type of reaction to anything before and it was more than slightly off putting. She hated it.

There was a soft knock on the front of the door, but she ignored it. Whoever it was, she didn't want to know. It wasn't like she could say a word to them anyways and they were probably just looking for Shisui. This was Shisui's apartment after all. She still stood in front of the mirror, glaring at herself and willing her voice to come forth. She had plenty of thoughts in her head, why couldn't she make her voice work?

The person knocked again, but this time it was accompanied by a voice. "Sakura? It's Mikoto. I brought lunch for you." Sakura didn't want to answer the door even more so now than before. What if Itachi was with her? She couldn't even look at Itachi. She was so ashamed about everything that led up to this and she couldn't bear to look at him let alone be in the same room as him. She stood on the threshold of Shisui's room and sent a mistrustful look towards the door. "It's just me, Sakura." The woman's voice was soft, tender, trying to lure Sakura out into the open. Sakura took the bait and walked slowly to the door, peering through the peephole. True to her word, it was only Mikoto. Sakura slowly unlocked the door and opened it.

"There you are," the older woman smiled at her. "I didn't tell any of them that I was coming so they couldn't tag along with me," she winked at her. Sakura was taken aback by the energy the woman brought with her and so took a step back. The woman bustled into the kitchen. "I brought some lunch and some bathroom things for you," she held out a shopping bag and a reusable container. Sakura took both from her and smiled warily, placing both on the counter.

"Are you doing alright here with Shisui?" Sakura nodded. She knew Mikoto, loved Mikoto, and thought she could say pretty much anything to her, but the voice just wouldn't come. She was so frustrated about this. Mikoto didn't miss a beat. "Well, I just came to drop that off. I'll see you later, okay?" Mikoto smiled and Sakura managed a halfhearted one in return. She didn't want Mikoto to go, wanted her to stay here. She didn't want to be alone, but Mikoto was already closing the door behind her. Sakura only sighed and put the shopping bag in the bathroom and slowly ate the lunch of beef stew the elder woman had brought.

Then, she returned to the mirror and stood in front of it again. She stared at herself, analyzing her face and her body. She was looking a little better nourished than before any of this had happened. She was looking a little better rested and the bags under her eyes were much less prominent. It was just her inability to speak to someone else, not even Itachi. It was just so frustrating. She stared at her mouth again, trying to make some words come out of her mouth, but all she could muster was a small, thin whine. She hated this and everything about it. She wished this hadn't happened to her and she still had the ability to speak to those around her without being extremely frustrated.

She was still in front of the mirror when Shisui came home. She heard him, but didn't move. He found her and stood in the doorway, staring. She pretended she didn't notice him and just stared at herself in the mirror. They stood there like that, in a standoff, for several long minutes until Shisui put his bag down and crossed to her. She looked up at him in the mirror while he placed his hand on her shoulder.

"It'll come, little cream puff, don't try and force it." She was surprised. How had he guessed what she was trying to do? She gave him a quizzical stare. "I know that speaking is what you're worrying about, silly. I know you don't like not being able to talk to me and Itachi, but it won't last forever," Shisui smiled down at her. "I wouldn't worry about it, not yet." He couldn't help the 'oomph' he emitted as she turned and burrowed her face in his chest, her good arm wrapped tightly around his middle. She was crying again. "Jesus, cream puff, why are you crying again?" he laughed nervously while resting his hands on her waist.

She shook her head, but no whimpers or sobs escaped her. He was so understanding and knew what was going on in her head. She couldn't help her tears. They weren't tears of anger or sadness. She supposed, since she couldn't make herself speak, she was trying to express her words through extreme emotion and body language.

"Did you just stand in front of the mirror all day?" he asked, worrying. She nodded. "What did you see?" She shrugged. She wasn't ready to let go of him, not yet, so he'd have to wait for her to be ready to step away from him. He waited patiently, a hand running repeatedly down her back. She didn't move for a long, long while, until her tears had stopped and she was ready to back away from his comforting embrace. She reached for the laptop and typed quickly before handing it to him.

He read through her words quickly enough before staring down at her, a bright smile on his face. "That's good. Your body's healing; we just have to work on your mental health." She nodded, pulling the laptop towards her again. He read her words and smiled. "I'm glad I'm helping, cream puff. Is there anything you want to do tonight?" Instead of reaching for the laptop again, she just shrugged and shook her head. There wasn't really anything she wanted to do.

"Alright," he knocked her knees out from under her and caught her easily, laying her in the bed. "Chilling in bed it is," he grinned and flopped down next to her, turning on the television. He had given up, slightly, trying to get her away from him. She needed to be around someone and that someone just had to be him. He didn't really mind all that much, though it still felt slightly awkward. He pulled his laptop towards him, hers already in her lap, and went to crawl through all of his work for his doctorate. Sakura was looking over his shoulder, curious. "It's my doctoral dissertation. I'm working on it, but I really don't know what to do it about," he was frustrated about it.

She typed quickly and showed him her screen. 'Why wouldn't you just do it about me and you? It's all sorts of fucked up.' She looked at him and he seemed to be thinking, so she pulled it back and typed quickly, showing it to him after a moment. 'We were in similar situations and we both dealt with it differently. There's a difference between us and you know it. You can document how you help me.'

"That's actually a great idea. I could call it 'abuse and the different way people react.'" Now that he thought about it, he was starting to love it. He had been lost about what the hell to do this huge ass paper on, but with Sakura's offer of using her for it, it made him feel better about it. He was smiling now and Sakura was staring at him with warmth in her eyes. She was happy she could do something to help him after he'd done so much for her.

"I guess I'll have to wait a while until you can speak again, though. I'll have to make sure I document that, too. I think this'll actually be a little more confusing than I thought," he was laughing now. "I have to ask you about everything, I hope you don't mind." Sakura laughed and shook her head. That stopped his rambling for a moment. That was the happiest noise he'd heard from her over the past two days. It made him stop for a moment just because he thought it was surprising. "Are you alright with everything?" he asked, wanting to make sure.

She smiled, a big glowing smile, and nodded. He couldn't help but to wrap and arm around her and draw her in for a hug, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. He didn't know why he had started to do that, but he couldn't stop now. It was like when he started calling her 'cream puff.' He liked doing it and couldn't stop now. The smiles he got from her when he pulled away were quite worth doing it, though. He always thought she needed to smile more.

She yawned and stretched her good arm above her head before rubbing her bad side. It was aching and she couldn't remember the last time she took her pain medications. "Why don't you wear a sling for your arm?" Shisui asked, curious. He was wondering why she wouldn't if her collarbone was broken. She couldn't get a cast there, obviously, but he didn't understand why she wouldn't keep her arm in a sling to keep it from moving and agitating her injury. She typed quickly and showed him the screen.

'All it does is keep my arm at my side. It's annoying and uncomfortable. I just can't raise my upper arm, so I opted out of it,' she shrugged when he looked at her. 'It's just annoying because it's my right side and that's my dominant side.' She huffed. She didn't like not being able to use her right arm, but it didn't matter much. It would be completely healed in another month or so, it wasn't that long.

"Ah. Well, I hope it gets better soon," he smiled at her. "Are your ribs okay?" she nodded, though grimaced when she shifted slightly. She pointed to the little orange bottles on his side of the room and he nodded, pulling it off his nightstand and handing them to her. She took them and leaned back into the pillows. She didn't like pills, not at all, but she didn't like pain too much either.

"Come here," he offered his arm to her and she happily entered his embrace. "Jesus, cream puff, if you keep coming to me so easily I might fall in love with you," he joked. He didn't feel that way, couldn't do that to his cousin, but she blushed and he liked seeing it. He didn't mind her head on his shoulder too much either. She seemed happy right now. "So, what are you going to do about my little cousin, cream puff?" She was very aware of who he was talking about. She sighed and hid her face in his shoulder. "Why don't you want to see him?" She let out a high pitched whine and pressed her face harshly into his shoulder. "Come on, type it out. Close your eyes while I read it, I don't care. I need to know, little cream puff," he brushed his hand through her hair, trying to get her to agree to it. She lifted her face from his shoulder and reached for the laptop near him. He passed it to her and watched her type one handed.

'I feel like I let him down. I feel like I shouldn't have let it come to this and I'm so ashamed and I can't bear to see what's in his eyes. I know you'll say he's just worried about me and wants the best for me, but I just can't see it. I'm not ready to face him. When he finds out what happened, he'll flip and he won't be very happy with me. I'm just putting it off I guess." She had hid her face in his shoulder again while he read it and he didn't quite know how to feel.

"Why don't you think I'll be angry with you when you finally have the courage to tell me?" he asked curiously. She emitted another high pitched whine and pulled his laptop back to her, typing quickly again. He was taken aback for a moment at how fast she was able to type one handed. How the hell did she do that? All too soon, she was pushing it back at him, but didn't hide her face in his shoulder again.

'You've been through it. You can't be angry with me. If you were angry with me, I've lost all hope.' He sighed and brushed his fingers through her hair. She reached to type, grimacing at the pain in her shoulder, but ignored it. 'You're my saving grace right now.' He sighed again. He heard a soft whisper near his ear and he hugged her a little tighter, feeling a little sadder. "Thanks, Shisui," were her soft, soft words. He couldn't help the smile.

"I could never be angry with you, cream puff," he said softly, moving the laptop to pull her on top of him so he could really hug her. "I could never be angry because I know. You thought he needed you and couldn't do anything without you. He made you think that. He made you think you were worthless and the only one that would take you was some man that would want you, some man that would do the same thing to you that your father did. He did something you thought he would never do because he made you think he loved you, but he didn't. He just wanted you to be his punching bag for things that are far out of your control." Tears were slipping down his cheeks now and he felt a small hand on his cheek. He looked down to see Sakura, crying as well, wiping his tears away gently.

"You're not allowed to cry right now," he said gently, brushing hers away. She was so sweet and small and he couldn't help but feel bad he'd made her cry again. She was crying so much lately and he didn't like it at all. She should be smiling. He got his wish when she flashed him a watery smile and buried her head in his chest. Her good arm was wrapped tightly around his middle and she pressed her body harshly against his.

How did he get here? Two formerly abused kids comforting each other in their shared experience. He wasn't supposed to be crying. His past was supposed to be far behind him, but sometimes it felt like he had just gotten out of the hospital that morning. He wasn't supposed to be sad, he was supposed to be the one that had lived through it and was offering the broken girl strength. How did that flip? He couldn't figure it out.

"Shisui," he barely heard her mumble. She was slowly starting to say those words now and he thought it was because she was so comfortable around him. His thoughts were proved wrong. She was upset, so upset that she'd made him cry, she wanted to say she was sorry. The need to apologize for making him cry bubbled up within her and she found her mouth working before her mind again. "I'm sorry, Shisui," her voice was so thin and wavering from her tears. "I didn't mean to make you cry, please don't cry." Shisui knew she was upset now. She wouldn't say so much if she wasn't upset, he already knew that.

"Shh, Cream puff," he couldn't help the soft laugh that bubbled up his throat. "You didn't make me cry, sweetheart," he wasn't supposed to call her that. It felt so wrong, but he just couldn't help himself. He didn't want her crying over him either. "You could never make me cry. I just got so angry and some things make me sad I suppose. It's got nothing to do with you, there's no need to say sorry."

She only nodded and he knew his words had calmed her if she was being all but silent again. She sighed and rested a little more comfortably in his embrace. She was comfortable with him, very much so, and didn't know why she was so uncomfortable around him before. He, meanwhile, couldn't get out of his head how very wrong this was and how his cousin should be here instead. He couldn't help it. He just couldn't. Sakura reached over and typed on his computer again.

"What?" he asked when she turned it to him. She sighed and just pointed to the screen.

'Stop fidgeting. You're fine.' He blinked. He laughed and shook his head at her.

"Alright, alright," he laughed. How did she know what he was feeling? He couldn't help but wonder it. He rested his hand on the middle of her back and leaned his head back on the pillows, watching the program he'd put on so long ago. His stomach rumbled and he wondered if Sakura was hungry, too. "You hungry, cream puff?" he asked gently. She nodded slowly and he knew she was sleepy. He sighed, laughing inwardly. She was so tired she probably wasn't going to get up and eat. "Alright, I'll be right back." He waited for her to roll off of him, but she didn't. "You okay?"

'It's hard to get up with my shoulder,' she showed him the screen. He wanted to laugh and pulled himself into a sitting position, giving her his hand to help her push herself up. She struggled slightly; unable to put her weight on her other arm and she fell back against him. This was totally his fault and he couldn't help but laugh. She shot a glare at him.

"Oh hush, I just couldn't help it," he said, a few more chuckles escaping him. He lifted her easily by the waist and rolled her over via her good shoulder. She got out of bed easily then and followed him as though a shadow to the kitchen. She sat at the breakfast bar that doubled as a countertop and leaned her chin on the surface, watching him. "What do you want?" she shrugged.

He smiled and went through his fridge. He had some beef. He could make some meatballs or some hamburgers and told her as such. She held her forefinger up for pasta. He smiled again and got to cooking. She was up at one point and joined him on the other side. She held her hand out for the beef and he surrendered it, giving her a confused look. She only shrugged and got out a mixing bowl, dumping the beef in. She went to the fridge and found some bell pepper and onion, deciding to throw that in. He watched her for a moment before putting on a pot of water to boil. He leaned over to watch her and, quite soon, she was putting meatballs on a cookie sheet and tossing them into the oven she'd preheated.

"I've never seen meatballs made that way," he said conversationally as he hopped up on the counter to wait. She leaned her back against his legs and shrugged. He wondered why she did this in the kitchen. Did she just want his physical touch all the time? He couldn't guess. He didn't understand what she was doing or why. He supposed he just had to accept it. He reached into the fridge next to him and grabbed a couple beers offering her one. She shook her head.

"I know, I know," he laughed. "I know you're eighteen, but its fine. It isn't like you're leaving tonight." He offered it to her again and she took it this time. He took the cap off for her and she took a sip. "Have you drunk before?" she nodded, shrugging. It wasn't anything exciting and nothing really happened. She supposed this beer was just going to make her very tired because of the meds she was on. She didn't mind. As long as she didn't drink more than this, it wouldn't matter much.

The meatballs were done and she pushed herself away from him to open the oven, pulling the meatballs out. They smelled amazing and he told her so, to which she smiled. The pasta was just about done, so he just got the sauce out of the fridge. Sakura couldn't lift the pot and so stood back and watched him drain it. He poured the sauce in and pulled out a couple plates. She looked at her arm helplessly when he tried offering it to her.

"Go sit down, cream puff," he laughed. She nodded and took her seat. He set her plate in front of her before sitting beside her. He felt bad. She was having trouble eating with her left hand and he thought it quite funny, but didn't want to laugh. She would glare at him if he were to laugh. "Do you want help?" She shook her head, focusing on her left hand. "Would it be easier to have it in your lap?" She flushed as she nodded. "Then do what you need."

Slightly embarrassed, she took the plate off the high surface and put it on her lap. She was able to use her right hand if it was down here, not so much on the table, though she needed to bend over to get it to her mouth. She knew how embarrassing she looked and therefore ate as quickly as she could. She put the plate back on the counter when she was finished.

"Why do you eat so quickly now?" Shisui asked, finishing. She only shrugged and he sighed, picking up the plates to wash them. Sakura didn't move until he turned around and then she was looking rather fearful. "What are you scared of?" Shisui asked, leaning against the counter. She shrugged and looked towards his bedroom. Shisui sighed. He didn't know what she was trying to hint at. He got the forgotten pen and paper from the night before and put it in front of her. She scribbled on it before handing it to him, keeping her face hidden while he read it.

"I'm not going to make you sleep on the couch," he laughed. "You can still sleep with me. I won't shove you out until you're ready." Sakura looked rather relieved and had the smallest smile imaginable on her face. She was glad. She didn't think he would want her in his bed another night when he felt so uncomfortable holding her. She had noticed before and that was why she had told him to quit fidgeting. Just holding his hand while she slept helped, though, and she knew he wasn't uncomfortable with that.

"Do you want to go to bed now?" he asked, offering her his hand. She nodded and he helped her get off the high stool. She followed him back to his room and he let her get into her side of the bed first. He grabbed some pajamas from his dresser and went to the bathroom to change. He saw that she'd taken a shower earlier; some of her clothes were in his hamper. At least she knew to leave them in the hamper instead of the floor, like Sasuke and Naruto. He hated how messy those two were. He changed quickly and went back to his room.

Sakura was hiding in his pillows. He only knew she was there because of her long pink hair poking out.

"What are you doing?" he laughed, pulling the blankets back. She blinked up at him and pulled the blanket back over her head. "Hey!" he laughed again and dug underneath the covers, finding her body fairly easily. He tried to pull her out, but she struggled away from him. Was she playing? He laughed again and jumped on the bed, trying to find her body again. She was laughing as he reached for her waist and she jumped again, trying to struggle away from him.

"Are you ticklish?" he asked when she got away from him. He heard a soft whine and he knew she was. He laughed and bounced near her, chasing her across the bed, reaching for her waist. When he got her, he wasn't letting her go again. He got on top of her and began tickling her, hearing her laugh. She tried to smack him away, but he was still tickling her and she was struggling underneath him, giggling like crazy.

"Do you give up now?" he laughed, putting his hands to rest. She flushed and nodded. He only rolled his eyes at her and rolled off of her, tuning into the program on the forgotten TV. He hadn't turned it off earlier. Sakura rested her cheek on his shoulder and smiled luminously at him when he looked to her. He only scoffed and grinned, turning back to the TV.

She was attacking his sides now and he hated it as he laughed, but he didn't try too hard to overpower her. He didn't want to hurt her and she seemed to be enjoying herself. He lightly tried to push her hands away, but didn't really try too hard. She was laughing and finally stopped, resting her forehead on his shoulder.

"Thanks, cream puff," he smiled at her. He hadn't laughed like that in a long while and it made him feel a little better. "What, did you need a laugh?" She shook her head. She pulled a laptop, he forgot which belonged to who at this point, and typed for him.

'I wanted one.' He smiled at her.

"Well, use me any time you want a laugh," he said easily. He checked the time and sighed. He really needed to get to sleep for work tomorrow. "Time for sleep now, though, no more tickling." She laughed and nodded, turning onto her back. He turned the lights off, but left the TV on just in case she wasn't feeling tired yet. He rolled on his side to face her and found her looking for his hand soon after. He grasped her hand tightly. "No nightmares tonight, right?"

She shook her head, muttering a soft 'no,' and smiled at him, which he returned. She closed her eyes, looking happy for once. He thought she was doing well. He thought she would get better sooner rather than later. He could sleep easily that night knowing she was close and safe.


	6. Chapter 6

**I KNOW BUT IT'S FLUFF AND I LOVE IT.**

* * *

Sakura woke slowly, finding herself wrapped up in Shisui's arms. She blushed when she realized, but didn't try to push away. He had a habit of pulling her closer when she tried to push away. She only returned her head to his chest. It must have been particularly cold the night before if he had pulled her to him. He didn't often unless he was particularly cold.

"Good morning," she heard his soft voice. She peered up at him from his chest and smiled, finding his hand with hers. She still wasn't talking much, unless she really, really needed to. Her injuries had long since healed. "Do you remember what we're doing today?" he asked. Her smile fell and she hide her face in his chest.

"I don't want to go," she whined softly. They had to go to the police today. She had gotten through the psych evaluation, Shisui at her side, a few weeks ago, but now she had to go to the police. She still hadn't seen Itachi, but had started texting him with an old phone Shisui had given her. He was happy that she was finally communicating with him and she was happy too. She missed him and the others quite a bit, but still couldn't bring herself to see him.

"I know, but I'll be with you every second, Sakura," he said softly, pressing a kiss to her head. He had begun to enjoy her body against him and couldn't help drawing her close when the nights were cold. He had found he would pull her close when the nights weren't so cold. It was beginning to bother him with how much he liked her close. He convinced himself it was just his physical reaction.

"Thanks," she said softly, face still hidden in his chest. He sighed and patted her waist.

"Come on, we should get up," he said. She sighed and rolled off of him, shivering when the cold sheets on the other side of the bed hit her. Shisui only laughed and wrapped her up in a hug again. He liked having her around. He liked having her in his bed and having someone to hold. He wasn't going to like when he had to give that up.

"It's cold," she whined. She curled into his embrace and wanted to stay there for a great deal longer. He laughed.

"I know, there's a sweatshirt right there, if you can reach it," Shisui said, pointing. Sakura pulled it over the edge of the bed and shrugged it on, letting it warm before she finally got out of bed. She felt Shisui press another kiss to the top of her head before hopping out of bed. "You can have the shower first, cream puff."

"What are you going to do?" she asked as she finally lifted herself out of bed. Taking a shower meant she had to go through the bags still in the other room to find something nice. She left quickly to do just that. She rifled through clothes for long minutes before finding something she liked. She gathered it up into her arms and went to the bathroom.

Shisui was just finishing breakfast when she got out. She sat at the breakfast bar as he placed an egg sandwich in front of her. She dug in quickly while he sat next to her with his own. She was always so hungry lately and she was getting her weight to where it should be. He was happy. She was healing and that was definitely good. He just hoped her progress wouldn't take a step back after today.

"Why don't you go watch something for a little while?" he asked, patting her shoulder. She only nodded and pulled herself up, watching him go to the bathroom. He was about to take a shower now, too. She went to flop back down into bed, knowing she wouldn't want to get back up when she got too warm.

"You are so silly," Shisui found her buried into the blankets. "Come on, time to go, cream puff." Sakura groaned and buried deeper into the blankets. He only laughed and shook his head, pushing his hands underneath her to lift her up. "Come on, you," he said. She whined again. He pulled her into his arms and she shivered at the cold, pressing close to his warm chest. He laughed.

"I don't want to go," she whined. He shook his head and set her on her feet, handing her a jacket. She shrugged it on, a pout on her face.

"Too bad, cream puff. You've put this off long enough," a month to be exact. She was able to wriggle out of it for so long because Shisui had a soft spot for her, but her time was running out and he wasn't about to let her father get off scot free. She sighed.

"Fine, fine," she sighed. "Let's go." She slid her feet into some flats and waited by the door for him. He put on his own shoes before grasping her elbow and guiding her out of the bedroom. She hadn't been out of the apartment in the month and a half that she'd been here. It was February now and she hadn't even thought of going back to school, either. She couldn't. There was just too much going on right now.

"You'll be okay," Shisui said softly. "I'll be with you every second and you won't even see your father. It'll all be alright." Sakura was still not in the mood. She didn't want to speak about that night or anything that had led up to it. She had finally told Shisui not even a week ago and he had held her for long, long hours while she cried. She didn't want to cry again.

"I know you'll be with me," she sighed. "It's just hard having to remember everything." Shisui brushed his hand over her arm, trying to calm her. They had gotten to the door of his apartment building and she was hesitating, hand on the door. She was always hesitating. "There's still snow," she said softly, happily. She hadn't even looked out the window lately to see there was still snow everywhere.

"There is. It's going to snow tonight, too," Shisui said, fondly remembering the snowstorm a couple weeks ago. There had been a lot of snow and the roads had been closed. He'd been shut in with Sakura for three days playing board games and talking about anything and everything. It had been a total bonding experience.

"Oh," she breathed. She was still hesitating. He grasped her hand, squeezing it tightly for a long moment, and pushed open the door. Sakura followed him closely to his car and was shivering while he turned it on and waited for it to warm up. She shivered violently and held her knees to her chest, trying to conserve warmth.

"For someone that likes snow so much, you sure seem to get cold easily," Shisui laughed. Sakura only shrugged. She didn't care much. The car finally warmed up and she allowed her legs to fall. He pulled out of the parking lot and made his way to the police station. Sakura was silent as she stared out the window and he knew she was worrying. He grasped her hand. "You'll be okay, cream puff."

"I like it when you call me that," she said softly as she stared out the window. He smiled. "Don't stop calling me that, ever," she sighed. He stroked the back of her hand and squeezed gently. She was still worrying and he knew it. He didn't quite have the words to calm her worrying because he had never been in that situation.

He parked in the police station's parking lot. "Come on, Sakura," he said gently, pulling her hand in an attempt to get her to move. She bit her lip and stared down at her legs. "Hey, it'll be okay." He wrapped an arm around her shoulder and pressed a kiss to her head. "Come on, you know you're safe with me," he smiled down at her, but she still looked scared. She sighed and nodded. He got out first and went to her side, opening the door for her. She reached for his hand and he helped her out of the car, though he knew she didn't need it anymore. She did it out of need to know he was still there for her without the words.

"Promise you won't leave my side," she said softly as they walked to the door.

"I don't need to promise," he smiled down at her, "I would never leave your side anyways." She flushed and nodded. She walked close to his side and had a death grip on his hand as he opened the door and led her in. He could feel her face pressed to the back of his shoulder as they walked. She was so shy and scared. It bothered him slightly. Was this how she was before? He didn't quite know.

"Is Fugaku around?" he asked at the front desk. The woman behind it nodded and went to find him, knowing exactly who Shisui was. Shisui tightened his hold on Sakura's hand and kept her close to his side, knowing she was scared. She seemed to calm minimally at being pulled close to him. Fugaku was walking towards them, looking slightly surprised at the head of pink hair only just visible behind him, but Shisui only smiled.

"Hello, Uncle. You said you wanted to talk to Sakura. I've brought her," he said with a smile, though didn't bring Sakura out from behind him. "Want to go to an interview room now?" he was trying to be pleasant and make this as comfortable for Sakura as possibly, but she was horribly tense.

"Of course, just follow me," Fugaku didn't smile, but he wasn't being unpleasant either. He led them to his office, though, instead of an interview room. Obviously he was trying to keep Sakura comfortable as well. He opened the door and let them in first. "I have to get the psychiatrist." Sakura tensed and gripped his hand tighter. Shisui only smiled and nodded at his uncle.

He led her to sit and held her hands in his. "Don't worry about the other psychiatrist, cream puff," he said softly. "He's just here to write a report. I can't do that. I'm not leaving you, Sakura," he aimed for a kiss on her head, but she went for a hug and he ended up kissing her cheek instead. She flushed crimson and backed away from him.

"Sorry," she said softly, watching him with large eyes. He only laughed and held her head still to kiss her cheek again.

"You're okay. It wasn't what I was aiming for, but it has the same effect," he laughed again, trailing his fingertips down her arm before sitting in the chair beside hers. She had her hand in his again, gripping tightly. She flinched when she heard the door open and watched the two men walk in warily, watching them with terrified eyes. Shisui tightened his hold on her hand.

"We have to record this conversation to bring up later in the court," Fugaku said shortly, pulling out a tape recorder. Sakura was terrified, Shisui could already tell. He didn't know what he could do in this situation to make her feel better. They were usually alone and comfort came easily then. It didn't come easily when there were people she was frightened of around. She finally jerkily nodded in answer to Fugaku, far later than she should have.

"So, Sakura, can you explain what your early life was like?" Fugaku asked. He could see she was uncomfortable. He could see that she didn't want to open her mouth. He looked to Shisui, willing him to do something. Shisui was looking at her, but didn't want to do anything in front of the other two men, but he knew he had to. He could see Sakura folding back into herself. She was beginning to hide herself behind her walls and barricade herself. It wasn't good in this settling.

"Sakura," Shisui pulled her close to him and into his lap. She flushed. She hadn't thought he would do something like this, much less in front of the others. He held her face between his hands and stared into her eyes. "Pretend I'm the only one here and you're telling this to me," she had told him everything before. She darted her eyes to the side and he brushed his hand over the side of her face, guiding her vision. "Close your eyes. Pretend it's just me and you on my couch." The psychiatrist with Fugaku was watching them, interested. He knew what Shisui was doing and found it intriguing.

Sakura submitted to Shisui and closed her eyes, concentrating on his hands. Once she closed her eyes, he wrapped an arm around her waist and the other was in her hair, his chin on her head. This was how he had comforted her when she had finally told him and she felt calm in his embrace now. Her tenseness was melting away and she felt a hundred times more comfortable when being pressed close to him.

"He didn't start beating me until I was five, when my mother left," she started after a shaky breath. She focused only on Shisui's calm breathing and his hand brushing through her hair rhythmically. "He blamed me for her leaving and beat me almost every night for it. He told me I was worthless and that no one would ever want me, especially for my hair. He made me start cooking then, too. There were so many times I burned myself or got an entire pot of hot water on myself. He would beat me every time I screwed up."

Shisui warned his uncle with his eyes not to try and ask her anything. Fugaku slid a sheet of paper towards him and he read it over quickly. The questions he needed to ask her. He waited a few moments, wondering if she was done, but she didn't open her mouth yet.

"What do you mean by that? How did you screw up, cream puff?" he asked softly, brushing her hair from her face. Her eyes were open now, but they were focused on his face and her hands were clenched in his shirt. He was certain she only had eyes for him and was completely focused on him now. "You can answer, you know it," he softly gave her support and she bit her lip, staring at him. He took a chance and kissed the top of her head. It calmed her enough to speak again.

"If the food wasn't good, he'd throw it at me. I wasn't a very good cook in the beginning, so he would throw hot food at me a lot. I suffered a lot of burns and I still have the scars. When I wasn't cleaning up after meals quickly enough, he'd come in the kitchen and break the dirty dishes over my head," her voice was getting shakier and shakier with every sentence. She was about to start crying, he was sure. "When I cleaned and he checked it, he would find some imaginary speck of dust and beat me over it until I vomited. He would shove my face in it and make me clean everything up after," she was crying now and he was quick to brush away her tears. The psychiatrist tried to give him tissues, but he shot him a warning look. Sakura wasn't one to use tissues, she rather just cry.

"So that was the normal beatings?" he asked softly, lifting her face to look him in the eyes. She nodded, sniffling. "I need you to say yes, little cream puff." She said yes, though watery and small. He smiled gently and brushed away her tears again. "What about other things that happened? Can you tell me about that?"

Just like before, she hesitated. He gathered her close to his chest again and pressed another kiss to her head. Her face hidden in her chest, she felt safe and could speak again. Shisui was keeping her safe and helping her ignore everyone else in the room. He waited patiently for her to speak again, just as he had those couple of weeks ago. This was a patience ordeal.

"I guess it started because I got older and prettier," she said, voice a little louder than she meant it to be in the quiet room. The tape recorder was in the back of her mind, though, so she knew she had to be loud. "His friends would come over almost every weekend and he would call me down. He'd let them fondle me and would make me undress in front of them. I would have to…" she gagged before she could continue and the tears were quick to return. She pressed her face into Shisui's neck before continuing, though her voice was still loud enough to clearly hear. "I would have to service them with my mouth at first and, when I got older, he made me bend over and take them." Her voice sounded as though she hated herself and Shisui clenched his teeth, his hand stopping for a moment in her hair. She hadn't told him that. He remembered he had to keep her calm, though, so he started running his fingers through her hair again.

"What else?" he asked quietly, voice barely constrained. He was angry, she could tell, and she pulled back to stare at his face, brushing her fingertips over his cheek. He calmed at her touch and gave her a soft smile. "It's okay, Sakura, just keep going," he said softly, hugging her tightly.

"When I was sixteen, I was expected to be married," she said thinly, her voice on the verge of breaking. "I applied to go to college instead and it was granted to me because of how smart I am. Because of this, I was chosen to be a 'golden maid' in my church, a beautiful girl that exceeds expectations of all the other girls in the age group." She had to stop for a moment. She took a steadying breath and looked at Shisui. "Can I have some water?" that would help, definitely. He smiled warmly and reached for the pitcher on the table. She didn't take her eyes off him and he handed her a glass.

She gulped it down and handed it back to him so he could put it on the table. He wrapped his arms tightly around her and pressed her close to his chest. "So what did that mean, cream puff?" he asked, needing to know both for himself and his uncle. Sakura was having trouble with this, he knew, but was having an easier time with him. It was good the other two weren't talking at all.

"I had to go to special classes with the pastor," she said, looking at the ground. This was humiliating and mortifying. She didn't want to tell Shisui about this, there was no doubt he would look differently at her. He only brushed his fingers through her hair and pressed another kiss to her head, telling her to go on. "My father would be present too. In the rectory, I would be made to do my duties in front of them. If I didn't do it well enough, I would be whipped and made to do it again. If I screwed up enough, I was made to perform sexual favors to both of them, usually orally," she said, her hand tightening in his shirt as she spoke. He quietly disentangled her fingers and let her grip the life out of his hand.

"Was that all they did?" he asked, trying to soothe her while he did.

"No," she muttered. "There would be group sessions where we would all have to perform on each other's fathers and have sex with them. The pastor would watch and tell us what we were doing wrong, whipping us if we didn't correct it." She sounded like she hated herself and he couldn't blame her. That was certainly a rough time. He cradled her and hugged her tightly, hoping she wasn't about to fold in on herself. "If we missed a class, he would strap us into a contraption and whip us. He would film it sometimes." She shuddered at the memory. "The classes are still going on. They go on until the golden maiden is married."

Fugaku wrote that down, eyes narrowed.

"Where was your church, cream puff?" Shisui asked, knowing his uncle wanted to write it down. Sakura gritted her teeth.

"Why do you want to know?" she asked, voice hard. She really had forgotten about the others in the room. He brushed her angry tears away and smiled.

"Please just tell me, little cream puff." She softened at his words and told him, Fugaku scribbling away. When he was finished, he nodded to Shisui to continue. Shisui smiled down at Sakura again, brushing a kiss to her forehead. She was really loving the attention she was receiving and wasn't really thinking about why she was getting it. She knew why, was just putting it out of her head. "So why were you put into the hospital?" he asked gently, knowing this was the topic that was the hardest for her.

"My father got arrested for assault and when he came home he demanded something to eat. I made it for him and he didn't like it, so he threw it in my face, and then beat me. That was at the beginning of the week. The week after, I was waiting for him to say goodnight and allow me to go to bed when he came in my room drunk. He told me he came to get what was his and he threw me to the ground, hurting my ankle and my wrist," Sakura was trying to say it all as quickly as possible so she could get it out. Shisui knew this and didn't want to try to stop her. "He tore my clothes off and held my arms so I couldn't fight and choked me so I couldn't make a sound," she was crying now, staring at Shisui's chest, "He raped me and left, breaking the bottle on the way out. He kicked me and kicked me and I heard my ribs crack and my shoulder hurt like nothing else when he left."

She was crying and he was brushing her tears away as quickly as they came. She was cradled so closely to his chest and her legs were hanging over the side. She sobbed and held her hands close to her chest. She was hurting and pulled his hand from her face, gripping it tightly and pushing her face into his chest. He tightened his arm around her waist and held her tightly.

"I took a broken piece of bottle," she continued on, voice thick with her tears, "I cut myself again and again until I passed out. I woke up in the hospital all bandaged up and that's it," she finished, head falling to Shisui's shoulder while she cried and sobbed. He brushed his fingers down her back, trying to soothe her, just as he'd been trying to this entire time.

"Shh, cream puff," he said softly, weaving his fingers through her hair, kissing her forehead again. She was grateful for his tight hold on her body and that he didn't mind her face pressed so harshly into his chest. He looked to his uncle, wondering if he needed anything else. He did, but this wasn't the moment. Sakura had to calm down first. Shisui went back to comforting her, hushing her and brushing his fingers through her hair.

"You're not in that nightmare anymore," he said softly, gently, near her ear. "You're here with me, cream puff, its okay." Sakura looked up at him and flung her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. Her sobs were already fading away and he only hugged her, brushing his hand down her back again and again. She calmed down a little more quickly after that. "You ready to talk to my uncle now?" he asked after a long minute. She nodded slowly and pulled back from him, looking to the calm man behind the desk. She was sure she wasn't looking pretty right now, but he didn't care.

"Why didn't you run away from home, Sakura?" Fugaku asked, watching her quizzically.

"My father needed me. He didn't know how to cook and couldn't clean up after himself," she said quietly, repeating the same story she'd been telling for years. "He loved me, I'm sure," she said, staring at the floor. "He got the pastor to allow me to go to college after all and I always had a roof over my head and anything and everything I needed. He just got drunk a lot and didn't know what he was doing. I thought that until he raped me." Shisui was hugging her waist, his chest pressed to her back, giving her strength.

"And you believe that?" Fugaku didn't sound condescending. Sakura knew she had to ask this.

"Yes," she said.

"Why did you try and commit suicide?" Sakura stopped for a moment. Shisui brushed fingers through her hair. He knew this was hard and she'd been crying so much. She would be very tired tonight.

"I felt hopeless," she said. "I felt like there was no way out of my situation and the only way was to take my own life," she didn't sound motivated about life at this moment, anyways, but she had a strong voice. Fugaku only nodded.

"Do you know that you will have to appear in court?" Sakura tensed. She wouldn't be able to sit in Shisui's lap at a court proceeding. Her breath quickened and he wrapped his arms tight around her, pulling her against his chest.

"You can do it, cream puff," he said softly, in her ear so no one else could hear.

"I understand," her voice was shaking. Fugaku only nodded and Shisui released her from his tight hold.

"We may have to call you in later, but for now you can leave," he said. She only nodded and gingerly pulled herself off Shisui's lap. He rose right behind her and wrapped her hand in his.

"I'll see you soon, uncle," he said, giving him a strained smile. Fugaku only nodded and Shisui led Sakura out of the room. He knew what the psychiatrist was going to say. He would say Sakura wasn't able to be in a courtroom with her father, that she was unable of speaking of the events unless she had someone she trusted with her. It would do well for the case against her father, but not well for Sakura come time for her to be in a courtroom. She would never hold up against the lawyer for her father.

"Shisui," she stopped him just as they left the station. She was looking miserable, more tears slipping past her eyes. "Shisui," she said when he didn't turn to her. "Please look at me," she felt like she was breaking and she just wanted him to look at her, but the time between her words was much shorter than she realized. He turned to look at her, worried. "Do you hate me, Shisui?" she asked.

"Sakura, let's get you warm in the car, alright?" he asked gently, leading her easily to the car. He got in and started it, noticing that she was shivering again. He waited for it to warm up before speaking. "Why do you think I hate you, cream puff?" he asked softly, reaching over to grasp her hand. She wouldn't look at him and he didn't like it.

She didn't answer so he just drove home. She didn't get out of the car for a long while and he just turned it off, picking her up when she still didn't get out. He carried her easily up the stairs and into his apartment. He went straight to his room and climbed into bed with her, lying on his side. She was still crying and her tears slid into his pillows.

"I don't hate you, cream puff," he said quietly. "I honestly don't know why you think I would."

"Because of all the things I've done!" she said loudly. "There are so many things I've done, things that I'm not proud of, and I hate it! I hate it so much! I'm so dirty and I'm not good for anything. Why should you like me? Why wouldn't you hate me?"She cried, letting her face fall into his pillows. He wanted to laugh at her actions, but knew better than that.

"Nah, cream puff," he said softly, pushing his arms underneath her to pull her to him. She curled into his body and pressed her face into his neck. "You didn't do those things because you wanted to, sweetheart," he was trying to calm her down and she seemed to be taking it. "I don't hate you, okay? I do think you need a nap though. I need one too," he said. He really needed a nap. This morning was hard on both of them, really, but she was safe here with him and he could rest a little easier now.

"I think I need a nap too," she said, sounding far better than she had a few moments prior. He smiled and settled close to her, a hand on her head and the other on her waist. She was comfortable and happy in his embrace and he was glad for it. It made it so much easier to calm her down and keep her calm.

"Go to sleep then, cream puff," he said gently. She nodded slowly and closed her eyes. He was doing the same as well. Fuck, he was tired. He made sure she was asleep before allowing himself to sleep as well.

Dd

When he woke, she wasn't in his arms anymore. He reached out with closed eyes, trying to find her, but she wasn't on the cold side of the bed either. Sighing, he finally opened his eyes to the dark room, but she was nowhere to be found. He blinked and pulled himself up to walk through the apartment, but didn't see her anywhere until he looked to the balcony outside the living room. She was standing out there, sans coat, and he thought she might be pretty cold.

Grabbing a heavy sweatshirt for her, he pulled on his shoes and his own coat before quietly sliding the door open and joining her on the balcony. She didn't give him any notice and he leaned against the railing next to her. He laid the sweatshirt over her shoulders.

"I could jump," she said softly, peering over the railing. "I could jump and I wouldn't wake up tomorrow." Shisui grasped her shoulders and spun her around. Her cheeks were red with the cold and snowflakes stuck to her hair and her eyelashes. She looked so beautiful and it broke his heart. How can she look so beautiful and sad, all in the same moment?

"How can you say that, Sakura?" he asked, anger making its way to the forefront of his mind. "I have spent too much time and I've broke my back trying to make sure you feel better and that you aren't sad anymore! Was that all for nothing, Sakura? Why do you just want to throw it all away?" She didn't react much to him, didn't show much emotion.

"I don't want to live." His heart sunk and he wanted to shake her. He was so annoyed.

"Why? Everything's better now, why do you want to kill yourself now? You're safe here, with me. Stay with me, why can't you just do that?" he asked, tears almost falling, but he tried his hardest to keep them from doing so. He wasn't the one who was supposed to be crying, she was. She was always crying and he had to be strong for her.

"I'm trash. No one would want me. I'm tainted," she said, staring at his chest. He did the only thing he could think of. He wrapped his arms around her waist, tugging her harshly to him as he connected his mouth with hers. He wanted her. He liked her. He wanted her to be around, but knew she wouldn't believe him unless he did something drastic like this.

"Stay here, with me," he said softly. "You're safe here and I want you. I'll always want you, cream puff." She sighed, tears slipping from her eyes. She hadn't expected that. She didn't know he would want her, either. She didn't know what to feel about Shisui now. She loved Itachi, didn't she? Why was she letting Shisui kiss her? She didn't know. Perhaps it was because she loved him, too? She couldn't love two people at once, that wasn't how it worked. Now she felt guilty and she didn't want to look at him. She didn't know what to say.

Then, he was kissing her again, holding her tightly to his body. Her fingers were clenching his shirt and she was returning the kiss without completely realizing why she did. She loved these two in completely different ways. She had never kissed Itachi and he had never kissed her, but she was completely engrossed in Shisui. Warmth blossomed in her chest, the type of warmth she'd only felt around Itachi. This was too confusing, but she was still kissing him and his hands were pressing her as harshly as he could into his body.

"Stay here with me," he repeated, leaning his forehead against hers. She finally nodded and he hugged her tightly. As long as she would stay with him, she was safe and that's all that mattered. He would be there for all her sleepless nights and all her bouts of depression and flings with suicide. He would be there and that was all that mattered. He could keep her safe and alive while she was here and that's all he wanted. He had fallen for her so easily and hadn't realized when it had happened, but now she was one of the most important people in his life.

"Come on," he finally said, "Let's get out of the cold," he continued, gently pulling her back to the apartment. She shrugged off the sweatshirt once inside and he looked at her worriedly. He brushed his fingers along her exposed skin, thinking her skin was cold to the touch. He pulled her to his warm body and rubbed any skin he could get to.

"What are you doing?" she asked, staring at his face. There was a worried look in his eyes and she couldn't understand why.

"You're cold," he said, focusing on warming her up. She was shaking slightly and he was sure she didn't notice.

"I didn't realize," she said, looking down at herself. She had grown numb to the cold after standing outside for so long. Shisui sighed and pulled her into the bedroom, pressing her into the sheets. He pulled off his shirt.

"Take your clothes off. Keep your underwear on if you want, but you're freezing and we need to warm you up," he said quickly. Sakura moved slowly as she took her clothes off, doing her best to keep herself hidden from him. She was finally starting to feel the cold he was going on about and was shivering now. How had she not noticed? He was beside her in the next moment, pulling her body against his and wrapping himself around her.

"You're too warm," she complained, trying to get a little space between them. He was scorching and she was so cold she could barely stand it. He wasn't letting her go; though, only pressing her closer. "Please, you're way too warm," she whined, trying to get him off her.

"No, Sakura," he said, quietly but sternly. "You're too cold. I know I'm too warm to you, but wait a few minutes and it'll get better." He brushed his fingers down her back. She stopped fighting him at least and he turned the TV on, hoping it would distract her enough to stop fighting him so hard.

"Hey Shisui?" she asked for his attention after a few minutes. He had been right. He was still a little too warm, but she was getting a little more used to it now. He looked down at her. "Can I kiss you?" she asked, voice tiny. He wanted to laugh. She didn't have to ask for his kisses, she merely had to take them. He leaned down and kissed her.

She pulled him on top of her with a strength he didn't know she had. She wrapped her arms around his neck and held him to her, kissing him harshly. He was surprised at her roughness, but didn't mind it. She finally released him and pressed his head into her shoulder.

"What was that about?" he asked, though he couldn't help but grin. He hadn't expected that. She was so cute, too. He didn't try to move from on top of her, face in her shoulder. She didn't seem to want him to.

"It was the simplest way to get you on top of me," she laughed. "I was still cold as all hell and wanted you on top of me so I could warm up faster. I just wanted to have a little fun with it." He couldn't help but laugh either. She had just wanted him on top of her? Why didn't she just ask? Did she really just want to kiss him for a few moments?

"You could have just asked," he teased her lightly.

"I wanted to kiss you again," she admitted shyly. "I've never been kissed before and I really like kissing you," she was so quiet and her voice was so shy. He thought she was being adorable and couldn't help it, not in the least. He turned his face to her and pressed a kiss to her cheek. He was glad he kissed her, though he knew he was definitely going to be dead when Itachi found out about this. How in the hell did he managed to fall in love with the same girl as his cousin?

Just as he thought that, there was a knock on his door. "Shit," he breathed, pulling away from Sakura. She watched him go, upset, and he threw his clothes back on. "Get your clothes on, cream puff, it seems like my darling family is here to annoy us," he pouted. He finally got to kiss her; got her to kiss him, and his lovely night of keeping her warm and half naked in his bed was ruined.

"Alright," she was up in a moment, throwing her clothes back on. She didn't even care that Shisui saw her in her under things. Just as she was throwing on a thick sweatshirt of his, he was crossing the apartment to the door. She went to the living room and grabbed the book off the coffee table to read. This was normal. They didn't want Shisui's family to catch them together in his bed so they had this all planned out to the last detail. No one thought anything was weird, so they were doing it very well.

"Hello, darling family members," Shisui said, the sarcasm in his voice heavy. He didn't really want to deal with them, not right now, but it didn't seem like he was getting out of it. Itachi and Sasuke were in his house, a plastic bag presumably full of dinner from Mikoto in Sasuke's hand. Shisui closed the door behind him and turned on the kitchen light.

"Where's Sakura?" Itachi asked immediately.

"Couch," Shisui pointed. He wasn't happy Itachi was here and wanted to hate himself for it, but couldn't bring himself to it. He was a rival to his little cousin now and he could feel disdain that he was here, trying to move in on his territory.

"The fuck is up with you?" Sasuke whispered angrily, thrusting the plastic bag into his hands.

"I was woken up. You know I hate it when that happens, cousin," Shisui said. Sasuke narrowed his eyes at him, but took it. He certainly did seem grumpy and was prone to taking people's heads off if he was woken earlier than expected.

"How are you doing?" Itachi was asking Sakura, his eyes worried. His hand was over hers and she was staring at him. He missed her luminous eyes on him and he reached to her to bring her into his embrace. She came easily enough and he was breathing a little easier now that she was comfortably in his arms. It had been so long since he'd gotten to hold her and he missed her dearly.

"I'm fine," she said softly. "Shisui took me to the police station earlier and I gave him a little scare out on the balcony earlier, but he talked me down from it." Itachi knew what she was talking about. She had told him she was having dark thoughts lately and it bothered him that he couldn't hold her while she had those thoughts.

"I'm glad Shisui is here for you," true to his words, he did sound relieved. Sakura melted into his embrace, enjoying his warmth. She was still a little cold from the balcony and so welcomed his overwhelming warmth. "Sasuke and I brought dinner from our mother," he said, voice even once again. He would let emotion into his voice more often than not around Sakura, and he knew it, but his voice would go back to the same even tone when he was done with that.

"Is it beef stew?" Sakura said, raising her face to him. She stopped. His face was very close to hers and she lowered her face, embarrassed. What she had done with Shisui flashed through her mind and she felt guilty again. She definitely loved Itachi, but she also definitely felt something for Shisui. God, why did this have to be so confusing?

"Yes, it is," his voice was amused. He knew it was her favorite from his mother, hence why he brought it. "Would you like to eat, Sakura?" he asked, loosening his hold around her. She only nodded. He grasped her hand and brought her to the kitchen, where Sasuke was heating up the leftovers. He and Sasuke hadn't eaten yet, choosing to accompany Shisui and Sakura. He was putting it into bowls before handing one to the three people around him. They ate, standing there, and Itachi didn't leave Sakura's side. This was the first time he'd seen her since she'd woken up and he couldn't help but hold himself close to her. She looked a lot better now.

Shisui, meanwhile, felt the unfamiliar feeling of jealousy in his body. Oh, he knew what it was, but didn't have much experience with the feeling. He wanted to shove Itachi out of the way and stand beside her instead, hold her close as he had been over the last month and a half. He calmed himself, though. He didn't have anything exclusive with her. His little cousin had the right to try his best too, even if he didn't know he was in competition with him.

"Would you like to come over tomorrow?" Itachi asked. "Naruto misses you and I'd like to have you around for a little while," he said, allowing himself to hope it would work on her. Before she answered, she looked to Shisui.

"You'll be fine, cream puff," he said from the sink. "No one's going to hurt you there." This was the usual line he'd give her when they were going anywhere and she was scared about it. It was his way of saying it was okay to go. He had to work anyways and he would rather she start reconnecting with her best friends.

"Alright," she said softly. Itachi narrowed his eyes at his cousin. "Oh, stop it, 'Tachi," she berated him gently. "I wasn't asking him for permission," she swatted him gently on the arm and he looked down at her in surprise. "I just need to be validated about some things," she said, pouting. Sometimes she wasn't so sure if she could do something, if she was up to it. She looked to Shisui to tell her that she was. That's why his words were like code words. He was assuring her that she could.

"Okay," he said a slight tone of amusement underneath his voice. She smiled up at him.

"You two need to go, though," she said, pointing to the clock. "If you want me to be up at a reasonable time, that is," she laughed. It was well past ten at night and she wondered why they were over so late.

"We would have been over earlier, but neither of you were answering your phones," Sasuke complained loudly. He had been annoyed and he knew Itachi had been too. There was a certain twitch in the corner of his mouth when he was annoyed. That twitch had been prominent all afternoon. "We just decided to come by.

"Sorry, I needed to sleep after going to the police station," Sakura laughed. Shisui only shrugged.

"I forgot my phone here when I went to the office," he lied easily. "When I got home I just fell into bed. I was tired as fuck after all that shit." Itachi hadn't been at the office today, it was a Saturday. Shisui tended to take two days off during the week so he didn't have Itachi breathing down his neck. It was an easy way to lie to him about his whereabouts during the weekend if he took an extra day off.

"Ah." Itachi believed him.

"We'll be going, then," Sasuke shrugged. "See you tomorrow, Sakura." Sakura waved in goodbye and received a hug from both of them before they left, Itachi holding on far longer than his brother. She and Shisui cleaned the kitchen quickly and turned all the lights off before going to his room. She was just about to climb into bed when his hand on her arm stopped her.

"What?" she asked softly, looking up at him.

"Can I ask you to take your clothes off again?" he asked, staring at her. There was a crimson blush on her face and she slowly shook her head. He laughed. "I didn't mean that in a 'I want to sex you up way,' cream puff. I mean that in a 'I like the feeling of your almost naked body against mine and it was torn away from me before I was ready to let go' way."

"Are you going to try anything?" she asked suspiciously. She wasn't the type to just take her clothes off around anyone and everyone, and she wasn't too trusting of what he was thinking at this moment. He only laughed again.

"I might try to kiss you, but only if you want me to," he said, brushing his fingers through her hair. "I just want to keep you warm," he said honestly. He knew it would take a little convincing for her to take her clothes off again, but he was sincerely hoping it was working on her.

"Promise?" she said, biting her lip as she looked up at him. He leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to her lips.

"Promise, cream puff," he said gently. She turned her back to him and began pulling her shirt over her head. He grinned and began taking off his own shirt. She was under the blankets by the time he joined her and she drew close to him. Damn, he was still scorching. How was he still this hot? He wrapped his arms tightly around her and squeezed her.

"You're still so warm," she said, pouting. He only laughed.

"You'll get used to it," he said, pressing a kiss to her head. "Just give it a little time, little cream puff. He was enjoying her skin against his, he wasn't about to let her go just yet. Though he was a little too warm and it was a little uncomfortable, she buried her face into his chest and folded her arms tightly to her chest as she pressed against him. It was nice to be with him here, like this.

"I'm not very tired," she murmured. He chuckled.

"I figured. Here," he rolled onto his back, her small body on top of his. "The TV's on, go ahead and watch until you want to sleep." He was able to fall asleep anytime, anywhere, no matter if he was tired or not. He was asleep a few minutes later, but she was watching TV for a long time afterwards. Sighing, seeing that it was well past midnight, she decided she needed to sleep. She rested her head on Shisui's chest and closed her eyes, making herself listen to his calm breathing and heartbeat. She lulled herself into a slumber after a while of listening to him.

* * *

She was still mostly naked and still pressed to his body, he found when he woke. God, this was definitely heaven. An adorable girl was lying half naked and completely comfortable on his chest. His arms were wrapped tightly around that adorable girl and she still hadn't stirred from her slumber. He sat up gingerly and pulled her up so he could kiss her. She woke slowly with his kiss and flashed a warm smile when he pulled away.

"What was that for?" she asked, voice thick with sleep. She laid her head back on his chest, not wanting to move. She was wonderfully warm and had a pleasant surprise upon waking. She wasn't ready to move yet. His fingers were in her hair and stroking, making her feel like she could go back to sleep. "What if I cut my hair?" she asked, watching her hand. His movements stopped.

He liked her hair. He thought it was beautiful and so much fun to run his fingers through. She loved it when he did that too. He wondered why she would want to cut her hair anyways, but he couldn't just tell her not to. He didn't want her to cut her hair, but he couldn't say that. She was getting fidgety from his silence.

"It's your hair, cream puff. I'll love it no matter what you do to it," he said, brushing his fingers through her hair again. She smiled and rubbed her cheek on his chest. She was so happy about his answer and he could see that. He was glad he gave her the right answer, but he could be unhappy about her decision to cut it.

"What time is it?" she asked, looking over to his alarm clock. "Shisui, you're going to be late!" she pushed herself off of him and rolled off the bed. He only laughed and grabbed her hand, pulling her down. "No, Shisui, you have to get up," she had a smile on her face, though. He only grinned and tugged her down to meet his lips.

"Are you going to make breakfast for me, cream puff?" he asked, smiling as he pulled away. Sakura flushed and nodded. "Alright," he released her and pulled himself out of bed, grabbing clothes to change into. He didn't pass a glance over her as he went to the bathroom to take a shower.

When he came out of the shower to see what she was cooking in the kitchen, he had to stop for a moment. She had only pulled on a sweater of his that had been sitting on top of the dresser. It was far too big for her and hung to the middle of her thighs. She reached for something over her head and he froze, watching the fabric tighten over her backside. To top it off, her hair was piled into a messy bun on top of her head, something he never thought he'd get to see. Fuck, how could she be this unknowingly sexy?

"Hey," he said, crossing the space to stand behind her. His hands were on her hips and she froze, flushing. "You know, you shouldn't wear something like this, cream puff," he said close to her ear. She made a soft sound and flushed again, staring at the cooking eggs. She couldn't breathe with him this close and her brain was going blank.

"Why not?" she asked finally, breathlessly; hand shaking when she went to get the spatula. He brushed his lips along her neck, loving when she tensed and fidgeted, trying to keep focused. She didn't want to burn breakfast.

"You look so hot," he said, pressing his lips to her neck. She took a sharp intake of breath. "I can't help but touch you when you look so good," his voice was so soft and slightly rough. It made her shiver, but she forced herself to focus on breakfast. She reached for their plates and piled the eggs on, Shisui turning off the stove for her. He didn't let her escape the cage of his arms and she turned to try and push him back. He just kissed her, his fingers sliding into her hair.

Sakura didn't know how she was supposed to react. She was just flushing, fingers clenched in his shirt, trying to make herself push him away so she could make him eat. That was proving difficult, though; he was distracting her and making it way too tough to think. He finally pulled away, allowing her to breathe.

"Come on," she was breathless and he couldn't help but smile at her, "We should eat and get going." He only grinned and nodded, reaching past her to get his plate. She joined him at the breakfast bar and would only stare at the plate, too flushed to look at him. "Why'd you do that?" she asked softly. It wasn't that she didn't like it. She liked it, a lot. She liked the way her heart accelerated when his lips connected with her neck and the way he held her against his body when he kissed her. She just wanted to know why he thought to do it.

"I couldn't help myself, cream puff," he said cheerily, looking down at her. Damn, she looked good from this angle too. "See, the things you wear have an effect on me. Though I prefer you without clothes, I couldn't help it when I saw you. Do you know how cute you look in a sweater that's way too big for you? And do you know how that sweater doesn't reach too far down your legs and tightens when you reach over your head?"

"Um, no," she flushed, staring at her food while she ate. She bit into her toast and he thought her quite adorable.

"Don't do it around anyone else, how about that?" he said. He wanted to keep this vision for himself. He didn't want his little cousin to see her like this. They were in a competition, that was true, but he didn't have to make it easy for him. She only nodded. "And you should do it more," she looked up at him, flushing and he winked at her. The blush only grew brighter and hotter. He liked that he could make her blush so much.

The rest of breakfast was quiet, though Sakura didn't stop blushing. He ushered her off to get changed while he cleaned the kitchen and couldn't help but smile when he saw her again. She was wearing a sweater dress, dark grey, though it didn't reach too far down her legs. She had pulled on leggings to keep herself warm and was pulling on her coat and a thick scarf.

"You look cute in that too," he smiled, going to get his coat and shoes. She was blushing again. She liked it when he said those things to her. He grabbed his bag and reached for her before going out the door. He kissed her again. Jesus, he really liked kissing her. He had to stop doing these things. Once he started, he just didn't want to stop. She was starting to get better at it too and he couldn't help the warmth that started growing in his stomach. It was getting to the point where he had to control himself around her.

"Come on, we have to go," she laughed when he pulled away. He rolled his eyes and nodded, letting her take him by the hand and pull him out the door. They were in the car and she was staring at her legs for a long moment while he began driving. "Do you like this?" she looked down at what she wore. She was wearing things she never had before. This was shorter and tighter than anything she'd ever worn and it was wreaking havoc on her self esteem.

"I like it quite a lot. I like kissing you when you look like that. Well, I like kissing you anyways, but I like seeing you in something like that anyways," he smiled at her. "It reminds me of when I get your clothes off," he joked.

"What?" she blushed.

"I can see some of your curves, silly," he laughed. "It reminds me that I got to see you almost naked twice now. It's a good reminder." Sakura flushed bright red. It wasn't that she didn't like his words; she just had never thought he would say such a thing. "You know, you've come a long way in the past two months or so," he smiled at her.

"How do you mean?" she asked softly.

"You're talking again, that's a big one," he laughed. "You're far more comfortable around me and you speak your mind. That never happened before. You're speaking while you eat now and you clean, but only when you want to. Otherwise, I don't mind taking care of it. You look a lot better and you don't seem so stressed or sad. Does that cut it?"

"Oh. Is that good?" she was a little afraid it wasn't. Did he want her to be shy and meek? Did he want her to clean up after him like a good little church girl or did he want her to keep her silence while she ate and wait for him to speak to her? She didn't know anymore. Had she gotten too comfortable around him?

"That's great, cream puff. I like the way you are now, silly. I like kissing you and hugging you and having you in my bed every night." Sakura seemed visibly calmed now and he smiled at the windshield. They were almost to his cousins' house and he wasn't happy that he had to let her get away from him. He wanted to be around her every minute of the day, just to see her blush and be around her soft personality. He didn't even mind validating her feelings all the time. He kind of liked doing it.

"I don't want to go without you," she pouted. Shisui laughed as he parked the car. "I like it when you're with me," the pout was still in her voice and he thought her quite cute.

"I'll be back to get you later after work, cream puff, don't you worry," he smiled. Sakura darted her eyes around the empty garage before she quickly shot forward and pressed a chaste kiss to his lips. He didn't really have time to react, but he didn't really need to. She had a smile and a blush on her cheeks. It was good enough for her.

"I'll see you later, Shisui," she said softly before jumping out of the car. She waited until Shisui had pulled away and was out of sight before she went to the door. She just went in, knowing she could. They wouldn't yell at her for it. The house was very warm when she walked in and she hung her coat up, sliding on her slippers afterwards. She didn't really do this anymore, but she liked being comfortable.

"Sakura! I didn't know you were coming by today." Sakura had found Mikoto in the kitchen and she was struck into silence when the older woman said this. She flushed as the woman rushed over and enveloped her in a hug. Sakura wrapped her own arms around Mikoto and she was surprised. Sakura had never returned one of her hugs before. She had definitely changed.

"I thought Itachi and Sasuke would tell you," Sakura said quietly. "Shisui dropped me off before going to work. I didn't mean to drop by unexpectedly." She felt bad now. She hadn't thought she had to inform Mikoto that she was coming; she thought that Sasuke and Itachi would take care of that. She was uncomfortable now.

"No, no, it's okay. I guess they just forgot," Mikoto said, a smile on her face. She was just making some cookies because she wanted to. It got boring during the day when she didn't have much to do and so cooked and baked a lot. Whatever she had left over she would bring to shelters and such. She just liked to cook. "You want a cookie? The boys are still upstairs, probably sleeping."

"Thanks," Sakura said when she had a cookie shoved into her hands. "I don't want to wake them up," she said softly, looking to the stairs. She and Shisui were often up very early. He liked going to work early, usually while she was still sleeping, just so he could get back to her early. She'd been doing it for so long she had forgotten others wouldn't often be up this early.

"Do you want to go shopping with me then?" Mikoto asked, eyes lighting up in excitement. She didn't have a girl she could dress up and shop for, so this was an exciting thing to do. Sakura flushed.

"I don't have any money, so I don't think it'll be very fruitful," she said quietly.

"Oh, hush, I don't have any daughters, so you'll have to do," Mikoto stuck her tongue out at her and Sakura flushed. "Anyways, my old clothes probably don't fit you very well," she walked to her and tugged at the dress she was wearing. "See? It's a bit loose. I know you don't think so because you aren't used to wearing it, but it's definitely a size too big."

"I couldn't ask for that," Sakura said, crimson staining her face. She didn't want to ask Mikoto for anything and she didn't really mind the old clothes. Even if they were a size too big, they did well enough.

"Oh, hush," Mikoto said again, "Think of it as your Christmas present. I didn't get you anything because you weren't awake to enjoy it, so a shopping trip is exactly what's happening. You have to deal with it," she winked at her. Mikoto certainly was exuberant. Was this where Shisui got it from? It's a wonder Itachi and Sasuke didn't have some of the same personality.

"Fine, fine," she sighed. It didn't seem like she was going to get out of it. By the look of Mikoto's eyes, she knew she definitely wasn't getting out of it. Mikoto smiled and turned to the oven, pulling out the last of the cookies. She shoved a couple more into Sakura's hands and she gladly ate them.

"I'll be right back, Sakura," Mikoto said, heading for the stairs. "I'm just going to change." Sakura nodded and sat at the island, going to eat the rest of her cookies. No one else came down and Sakura found herself a little upset with her friends. They knew she was coming, so why were they still sleeping? She slightly wanted to go and wake them up, but thought better of it. Mikoto really wanted to go shopping with her and the boys would bring it down a bit.

"Look who I found," Mikoto said as she came down the stairs. Naruto was behind her, smiling, already dressed in clothes appropriate for the cold weather.

"Sakura!" Naruto yelled as he bounded down the last couple of stairs and barreled towards her. He caught her in a giant bear hug, holding her tightly, and couldn't help the stupid grin on his face when he felt her hands move to his middle, hugging him back. It was a pleasant surprise and he pulled back. "What are you doing right now?"

"Mikoto is making me go with her," Sakura had a pout in her voice and Mikoto laughed.

"We're going shopping, Naruto. She needs clothes that actually fit her. You're welcome to come with us, but it'll be quite boring for you." Mikoto wasn't going to say no to Naruto if he wanted to tag along, but knew he would be quite bored if he did. Naruto only laughed.

"It'll be boring, but I'll call Hinata to join us," he said easily. "It'll be less boring with her around and I've wanted her to meet you for a while, Sakura. I just didn't think you were up for it just yet." Naruto had been waiting for Sakura to show up sooner or later. He missed her, tremendously so, but knew she would come when she was ready. It was the other two he had to calm down and explain this to. That was definitely a first. They usually were explaining things to him.

"Oh, so you're finally dating her?" Sakura asked as they made their way to the garage. Mikoto led them to her car and Naruto ushered her into the front seat.

"I've been dating her for about a month now. She knows all about you because you'll always be my first love," Naruto joked. Sakura rolled her eyes. She knew it was partly true, at least. Naruto had always had a huge soft spot for her and had asked her out once or twice. She knew he wasn't completely joking.

"Alright, well, call Hinata and tell her to meet us in the mall in the city. Or would you rather we pick her up?" Mikoto didn't mind picking anyone up. She didn't mind Hinata, either. She was soft spoken girl with a heart of gold.

"She'll probably need to be picked up," Naruto said, shrugging. He dialed the number and she answered quickly. She said yes, of course, anything to spend a little time with him, and Naruto was directing Mikoto to her house soon after. Sakura wasn't paying much attention. She was staring out the window, thinking of her morning. There was a light blush on her cheeks when she remembered Shisui's warmth and the way he kissed her.

"What are you thinking about over there, Sakura?" Mikoto asked while they were sitting and waiting for Hinata.

"Nothing, just my morning," Sakura said softly. Mikoto watched her closely. She was blushing and her hands were tight in her lap. Whatever had happened, it wasn't bad. She seemed to like remembering it. She only smiled to herself. Sakura wasn't about to tell her what was going on in her head. It was definitely private.

"Found her!" Naruto said as he slid back into the car, Hinata on the other side. "Hinata, the girl in the front seat with the pink hair is Sakura. I told you about her, remember?" Naruto was smiling brightly and had to tap Sakura to get her attention.

"Sorry, what?" Sakura said, shaking her head and turning around.

"This is Hinata, Sakura," Naruto said, a grumble in his voice. "Remember I told you about her?" he was annoyed, that was for sure. Sakura didn't usually have her head in the clouds and he was slightly worried something was up with her. That didn't stop him from being annoyed for her not listening, though.

"Hi, Hinata," Sakura smiled, reaching her hand back to shake hers. Naruto was surprised now. Sakura didn't usually touch other people, shied away from their touch when she didn't know who they were. She was openly shaking Hinata's hand now, smiling. The moment was over a little too quickly for him and she turned back to the front, back to staring out the window and thinking again.

Hinata knew, from Naruto, that Sakura was a quiet little thing, but was surprised she held her hand out to her. She hadn't expected the other girl to be here, but didn't mind. She had Naruto with her, so it'd be okay. She just hoped Sakura wouldn't take too much of his attention. Her good mood at being with him would definitely be dampened.

"Come on, kiddies, we're here," Mikoto said as she pulled herself gracefully out of the car. Hinata watched Naruto open the door for Sakura, but the pink haired girl waved him off and got herself out of the car.

"I'm not that girl anymore, Naruto," she said lowly before walking to catch up with Mikoto. Naruto watched, a little confused. She didn't need him anymore, is that was she was saying? She didn't need him to protect her? She had changed, a lot, and Naruto was being blindsided by it. When had this happened? When had she turned into this girl?

Hinata knew he was in a bad mood now and didn't know what to say. The words she couldn't hear were lost on her and she didn't understand what was wrong. "You okay, Naruto?" she asked softly as they entered the mall. Naruto just shook her head.

"Sorry, I just haven't seen her in a long time," he said, trying to laugh off his insecurities. "She's just really different and it caught me off guard. I guess whatever Shisui is doing to her is good." He still wasn't quite sure. He wanted the old Sakura back. The Sakura that hid behind Naruto and Sasuke and always needed them around to make her smile. "She doesn't need me like she did and it's just catching me off guard."

"How did she need you before?" Mikoto was in a store with Sakura, holding things up to her body. The girl was blushing and looking uncomfortable, but wasn't really minding it. Hinata didn't think she seemed odd. A little quiet and out of her mind, perhaps, but not odd. She identified with her, if anything.

"Her father beat her up a lot and she wouldn't tell us. He did a lot of things that made her really shy and scared of other people. Sasuke and I were her buffer to the rest of the world and we got her to smile when she really didn't want to. We could see when she was getting to that place Sasuke goes sometimes and we could do something about it. I guess she doesn't need that anymore." Naruto was looking sad and Hinata didn't quite know what to say to make him feel better. Sakura was smiling at Mikoto, shaking her head at something.

"I'm sure she still needs you, Naruto." This wasn't something she wanted to say to him. It felt like she was helping him win over another girl. She knew, though, that Sakura had no interest in him and so took little comfort in that. "It's just in a different way now. I'm sure she still needs you to be her friend, just not in the same way."

"Well, yeah, but she hugged me back today. It felt really weird. It felt like she doesn't need comfort anymore and is able to show it to others instead." Naruto shook his head. "Sorry, Hinata, why don't we go get a smoothie while those two are distracted?" he smiled. Hinata's eyes lit up and she nodded enthusiastically.

* * *

They were back at the Uchiha house now and Sakura was wandering the halls, looking for Itachi. She was exhausted after Mikoto dragged her to five different stores and had her carry an endless amount of bags. She hadn't thought Mikoto would buy her so much but here she was. That was just an obnoxious amount, but Mikoto just shut her up with a look.

"Itachi!" Sakura was faced with him just outside his door. She'd just been about to knock, but he opened the door right before she could. He stood there, surprised and therefore speechless, and she took the initiative to rush into his arms, hugging him tightly around the neck. She was a few inches off the ground, he was very tall after all, but she found it a little easier to hold on when he wrapped his arms around her waist, giving her a little support.

"Hello," he finally said. "I didn't think you'd actually come today." Sakura pulled away from him, which he wasn't too happy about, and pouted.

"Why not, silly 'Tachi?" she asked, her arms by her side. Fuck, he said the wrong thing. She was no longer pressed against him and her arms weren't around him anymore. It was slightly annoying. "Why don't you think I would come when you ask me to?" she didn't seem about to cry, but definitely looked disappointed.

"Sakura," he said, pulling her arms back up to rest around his neck. "I just didn't think you wanted to come see me, that's all. You have been pretty scarce for a while you know," he pulled her back into the hug and she didn't try to pull away this time. She enjoyed his embrace; she hadn't been able to enjoy it in a long while.

He pulled her into his room and sat her on the bed, taking his customary place next to her. Sakura was happy she was in his presence, but suddenly thought of Shisui. Great, now she felt terribly guilty again. She had let him kiss her, initiated kisses with him, and had continued letting him kiss her. She had taken off her clothes and felt his skin against hers the night before, too! She felt mortified and like she was doing something terribly wrong to Itachi.

"What's up?" Itachi had noticed her shift in mood. She wasn't very comfortable anymore and she was fidgeting. She was looking at the floor and wouldn't look at him. Was she ashamed about something? He couldn't tell. It was definitely bothering him. She smiled uneasily and just pulled at his hand, beckoning him to lie down.

She was wrapped up in his arms and the noise of the TV filtered through the room. She should feel happy and safe, but that seed of guilt was growing inside of her, bothering her to no end. She felt terrible that she had kissed Shisui, continued to kiss him, wanted to keep kissing him, but didn't know how to say it to him. She liked him too and honestly wouldn't mind kissing him either, but that would feel like she were betraying Shisui, then.

Itachi didn't seem to think anything was wrong. She was usually pretty quiet and he just took the chance to brush his fingers through her hair, enjoying her presence. It had been a long while since he had the opportunity to lie here like this and he didn't want to miss it. He didn't want to close his eyes and miss a single moment with her.

"'Tachi," she said, voice small. "You're squeezing me too tight." He loosened his hold on her, but pressed her just a little closer to his chest.

"Sorry," he said softly, pressing a kiss to her head. She smiled, somewhat sadly and he was concerned. "What's wrong, Sakura?"

"I just missed this," she lied, though she was really feeling extremely guilt ridden. She was just so confused. She'd had feelings for Itachi for so long, but what she had with Shisui was new and exciting. It was just so confusing and she couldn't choose between them, not really. She definitely liked both of them for entirely different reasons. She just had to keep her turmoil to herself before she could make a decision.

"Do you know when your father's going to court?" Itachi asked, staring at the TV. His father had told him how she hadn't been able to speak about it without Shisui doing some psychiatric shit and made her pretend it was just the two of them. Sakura had told Shisui everything, he knew that now, and he wished she would tell him. He still didn't know why she wouldn't.

"The court date is set for a few months from now," Sakura shrugged. "I'm not sure what I'll do, honestly, but the prosecutor said she's going to work with me and prepare me for court so I don't say the wrong thing so my father's lawyer can attack me. I don't know how well it's going to go."

"Do you want me to be there for you on that day?" he asked. He wanted her permission. She still hadn't told him what had occurred and he didn't know if she would want him to find out that way. She thought for a long moment, staring at his chest. He waited patiently for her to answer and it took a few long minutes.

"Sure," she said softly. She would tell him soon. She would have to, now. This was just a way to give her motivation to do so. She didn't want him to find out in that courtroom, so she'd have to tell him. Itachi only nodded and brushed his long fingers through her hair again. She relaxed in his embrace, feeling a little calmer.

"Why didn't you want to see me for so long?" he asked, mainly out of curiosity. Sakura sighed and looked away from him, hiding her face. He thought, perhaps, she needed to, and let her do what she needed.

"It's the same reason why I'm having so many problems telling you," she said softly. "You're going to be angry with me and I don't think I could take it." Wasn't it enough that she was here with him now? Why was he asking all these difficult questions? She didn't understand. He couldn't just let things lie for now and enjoy her company, could he? He just had to ask her everything right now.

"I wouldn't be angry with you," he said quietly. Sakura was out of his arms and standing now. He blinked at the rate of which she moved and slowly sat up, confused. "Are you okay?" he asked. It was about to burst out of her, she could feel it. The words were bubbling up her throat and she was about to let them out. She'd been having problems with just blurting things out, ever since she had the problem with talking. The only way she'd been able to was when she was feeling extreme and that had kept up throughout the months. She couldn't help it now.

"He raped me!" she shouted, tears slipping past her eyes. "He raped me and I didn't call you. I just reached for the first thing I could reach that would hurt me. I was being selfish and thinking of myself and I hurt myself so badly I almost died. Why don't you hate me for that?!" she was angry and not understanding and tears were running rampant down her face. She wanted Shisui. She wanted him so badly right now because he wouldn't just be sitting there, watching her cry and hurt.

"You were sad," Itachi didn't quite know what he was saying, just knew he had to say something to calm her down. He slowly rose from the bed and stepped towards her, holding out his arms. She backed away from him, hugging herself. "You were sad and you didn't know what you were doing until it was too late," he was backing her into a corner, but that meant he could get his arms around her.

"I should have thought about it!" Why wasn't he saying these words? Why was he being so calm and trying to hug her? He should be upset, like she was. He should be yelling at her and saying the things she was. She hugged herself tighter and took another step back, hitting the wall. "I should have thought about it and called you, Naruto, Sasuke, someone! But I tried to take my own life instead of thinking about it!"

"Sakura, it's alright." Itachi was recycling these words. They weren't his own. This is what he had heard Shisui say to Sasuke once upon a time and he had stored the knowledge for later. He had never thought he would need it, but here he was. He was glad he had listened all those years ago and had remembered his words. "You weren't yourself. You're better now." He finally got his arms around her.

Sakura broke down into his arms and sobbed loudly, her face pushed into his chest by his hand. He shushed her and dragged his fingers through her hair and down her back, repeating those words. It was still a long road, he could tell, but she was here and crying in his arms. This was a bigger step than he could have asked for.

"I'm not angry with you, Sakura," he said softly. These were his own words now. "I was worried." She only nodded. He hugged her tightly and picked her up easily, bringing her back to his bed. She needed to sleep after all that crying, he knew that much. "When is Shisui coming to pick you up?"

"Three," she said softly, looking at her phone. It was about two-thirty now. She had another hour with Itachi and then Shisui would be back to whisk her away. Half of her couldn't wait to see his smiling face again, but the other half of her didn't want to leave. It wanted to say here with Itachi, in his arms. The time seemed to go by too quickly for her and her phone was ringing too soon.

"Hey, Shisui," she said, sitting up. "Yep, okay," she turned off the call. "He's here and doesn't sound very happy, so I have to run," she sighed. Shisui wasn't usually stressed, but if he was asking her to come down to him instead of going to find her, something was wrong. Itachi only nodded, knowing full well what she meant. "Walk me down?" she asked, a soft look in her eyes.

"Of course," Itachi pulled himself up. Sakura reached for his hand and he couldn't help the small smile cross his lips. He led her, like all the times before, down the hallway and stairs. She didn't let go of him until he stood by the door, watching her get her shoes and coat on.

"Tell Sasuke I'm sorry I didn't get to see him today," Sakura said as she zipped up her coat and grabbed her scarf. Sasuke had been scarce today, but she hadn't meant to spend so much time with Itachi. She had been slightly silly thinking that. She should have known she wouldn't leave Itachi's side when she went to see him.

"Alright. Come again soon so you can," Itachi said, giving her a tight hug. "I'm glad you came by today," he let the tiniest amount of happiness in his voice and she smiled, obviously hearing it. She only nodded and drew away from him after a few long moments. She waved just before she shut the door behind her and crossed to Shisui's car that was sitting at the entrance of the garage. She slid into the front seat and passed a glance over him. His lips were set in a thin, straight line.

"I heard Mikoto dragged you off on a shopping trip," he was trying his best to be cheery for her, she could tell. "She brought the bags out. I knew my aunt was a bit exuberant, but that's a little obnoxious," he forced a laugh. He felt Sakura's tiny hand on his and he looked to her.

"Don't worry, Shisui," she said softly, staring at his hand. "You don't have to be happy for me," she said sweetly. Shisui shook his head. Of course he had to be happy for her. She wasn't going to like the news he had to tell her, the reason for his stress. He turned his hand over and held hers tightly, squeezing so hard he knew she was probably losing feeling in her fingertips. "I'll make you feel better," she said softly as they drove.

"I don't think you can," he struggled to make his voice calm, but she didn't seem to mind at all. She passed the fingertips of her other hand over the back of his. She was gentle and worried about him, but he was prematurely worrying about her. This wasn't good and he wasn't sure she'd want to leave his apartment after he told her. He was sure he would have a hard time getting her to let him leave as well. She would be stuck to his side like glue.

"Shisui, what's wrong?" Sakura turned her body towards him, completely worried. "Please tell me." Dread grew in her stomach, turning it into a pit that she was having a problem getting out of. Her worry was turning into dread and she hated the feeling. She just wanted to know what was wrong and he was being way too silent right now.

"Your father posted bail," he said, voice strained. "He doesn't know where you are and there's a restraining order against him, but I don't know him as well as you do. Will he come after you? Will he be able to figure out where you are?" he couldn't help but ask all these things and he could see that she was bothered now. She wasn't looking at him and her jaw was clenched.

"I don't know." There was so much fear in her voice and he wished he had made it home before letting it spill. He wanted to hold her, make her feel better, but he couldn't while he was driving. "I've never run away from him before, but I don't think he'll give up too easily on me," she looked out the window pensively.

"What will you do?" it was only ten minutes before he got home, but it felt like forever. He wanted to get her there and get her comfortable. He thought this was annoying and terrible and he hated it. Why did they have to give him such a low bail? Why didn't they see he was a danger to Sakura and couldn't be let out on the street? This was bothering him and he couldn't quite get it out of his head.

"I don't know," she whispered hoarsely. Her entire world was crashing down around her and she couldn't find a way to look past it at this point. She wanted to cry, but tried to hold her tears back. She didn't want to cry, she cried too much. Shisui passed a glance over her and drove just a little bit faster. The air was tense and she didn't want to get out of the car at this point. She didn't know where she wanted to be, and she was getting frustrated. Those dark feelings were coming back again.

"Come on, cream puff," he said softly when he opened her door. She reached up to him and he sighed, reaching down to pick her up. At least she was reaching for him. He shut the door behind her and carried her easily up the stairs. He had gotten used to this and it wasn't too difficult to do anymore. She wrapped her arms tightly around his neck and held on.

He brought her to the bedroom and she tumbled out of his arms to the bed. He had to get changed before joining her and she watched him from her place on the bed. He just changed in front of her at this point. She had seen him in just his boxers, it was fine now. Sakura reached her hand out to him and he took it, falling in bed beside her.

"Don't be upset over me," she said softly, pressing a hand to her face. Her eyes were glowing and she wasn't even crying. Oh, she wanted to, but it was time to be strong for Shisui instead. He was upset over this and it was her turn to calm him down and put a smile on his face instead. He closed his eyes and leaned his cheek into her hand.

"I'm just worried. I want you to be safe from him," he said quietly.

"Between you and Itachi, I'm sure nothing will happen," she said, smiling. He opened his eyes to see it and realized she was getting closer. He was surprised when she pressed her lips to his. She kissed him because it had made her feel better out on the balcony. It would make him feel better too, right? By the way his arms tightened around her waist, dragging her close to him, she'd been right.

He wasn't pulling away, though. He was attacking her mouth hungrily, greedily, and she didn't stop him. He had been so jealous when he found out Sakura had been upstairs with Itachi. He wanted to wipe him from her mind, replacing the memory with the way he kissed her and held her so tightly. Her arms were tight around his neck and she was on top of him. One of his hands was in her hair, tugging lightly, and the other was on her lower back. He pulled her head gently to the side and he attacked her neck, kissing and gently biting.

"What's gotten into you, Shisui?" she asked breathlessly through her hazy mind. He had never really tried this before and it was causing her mind to go haywire. Sure, he had gone after her in the morning, but this was a little different. She could tell the mood was a little different. He pulled back and she couldn't say she was happy about it.

"I don't know, I'm sorry. I guess I just got a little away from myself," he said, smiling. Her kiss had been so surprising and he couldn't help but go after her, the image of that morning in his mind. He wanted to get her clothes off. He didn't really know where that feeling came from. He didn't even really know why he was so immersed with her. Why he liked her so much. He just had been spending so much time with her and watching her and realizing she was probably the cutest thing on the planet.

"I didn't tell you to stop," she said, a pout in her voice while she dropped her chin to his chest. She was enjoying his attention that much was true, and couldn't help but be a little disappointed when he stopped. She liked kissing him and hadn't wanted him to stop.

She let out a little squeak when she was suddenly turned over and his lips were back on her neck, his hand on her waist. Her hands were on his shoulders, nails digging into his shirt. She was pretty new to attention like this and there was an unfamiliar feeling coursing through her. She liked it, immensely so.

He moved back to her mouth and kissed her, his lips prying hers open and he slid his tongue into her mouth. A soft noise of surprise left the back of her throat and she tightened her hold on his shoulders. One of his hands, she wasn't sure which, was in her hair, angling her head just the way he wanted. He was between her legs and she wanted to lean her body into his, but didn't. She stayed still, kissing him back, hands on his shoulders.

"Is that what you wanted?" he gave her a devilish grin when he pulled away. She flushed at the look in his eyes. She knew that look, but she wasn't afraid. He wasn't her father, or her pastor, or any of the countless men she had been forced onto. She wasn't scared of him because he would never hurt her and he'd been kissing her so nicely. She thought that was validation for what she felt right now. No one else had ever kissed her.

"I'm not sure what I wanted," she said softly, a smile on her face, "I'm just glad I got it," she grinned and he returned it, leaning down to press another kiss to her lips.

"Are you hungry, cream puff?" he asked, rolling off of her. He wasn't about to try anything. She gave no indication that she wanted to go farther and he wasn't going to work himself to the point he was going to lose control. He didn't want to. It certainly was a weird feeling.

"A little," she only turned her head to him and he thought her glorious. She was lying where he left her, one hand by her side and the other by her side, her legs crossed over one another. Her eyes were slightly hazy and lips bruised from his hungry kisses. He had to take a deep breath so he didn't crawl back on top of her and attack her lips and her neck again.

"What do you want?" he asked, pulling himself off the bed. He averted his eyes from her form. Her dress was pulled up to her waist, giving him a teasing glance of her skin before the leggings started. How he wished he could get all those clothes off. He blinked, trying to get those thoughts out of his head. He was going crazy, that's for sure.

"Why don't we get some burgers?" she asked, pulling herself off the bed and finally fixing her clothes, much to Shisui's relief. It was getting so hard to control himself around her and he could tell her control was wearing thin as well. He could feel how she wanted to continue, but she hadn't actually made the move. He had backed off just in case.

"Sure," he finally answered her smile. "Come on, cream puff," he reached his hand to her and she grabbed it. He wasn't so worried anymore. She wasn't, after all. He was surprised for a moment. He watched her as she got on her shoes and coat. When had she started being able to calm him with a few words and a kiss? He didn't know how this happened. Sakura was getting better, growing up a bit and it was just because of him. He had followed her to psychiatrist appointments and held her during the night. He had talked her down from the ledge several times and had found himself in love with her and kissing her easily, wanting to steal her away from his cousin. This was wrong and he just didn't care. He wanted her, he loved her.

Somewhere along the line, she didn't need him so much anymore, but she still wanted him around. That meant more to him than she realized, though she probably barely realized it herself. She grabbed his hand on the way out the door and gave him a luminous smile. He couldn't help but smile back and wrap his arm around her waist instead.

* * *

 **Spoiler alert! this one's really long. Well, that's not a spoiler alert after you've already read it. Anyways, I started this last night and when that happens and I fall asleep and then continue it the next day, it tends to come out longer than what you wanted. Deal with it.**


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